INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY.
A young woman in a smart suit and horn-rimmed glasses is bustling around a control board on the exterior of the booth, getting everything set up for the upcoming segment. Inside the booth, a large dark-haired young man is slumped over the desk. A PRODUCER holding a coffee mug approaches the exterior control booth and watches the young woman work for a few seconds. He then glances inside the recording booth and calmly takes a sip of his Sanka™.
PRODUCER: What’s he doing, taking a nap?
CORYNNE, THE UNDERPAID ASSISTANT: [busily flipping switches] He’s drunk.
PRODUCER: He can’t be drunk, it’s eleven o’clock in the morning.
CORYNNE: Well, he is. He tried to kiss me.
PRODUCER: [raises eyebrows]…and…?
CORYNNE: And what?
PRODUCER: …did you…?
CORYNNE: [scoffs] Ugh. No.
PRODUCER: Are you kidding? Half the women in New York would push you in front of the A train to get a chance to sit on his lap for two minutes.
CORYNNE: He smells like a Crown Royal distillery.
PRODUCER: Well, you’d better wake him up. We’ll be on the air in two minutes.
CORYNNE: Do you have a broom I can poke him with or something?
— [consciousness flies open] —
JOE NAMATH: Whazzissaathhmmmm?
PRODUCER: [via the talkback microphone] Joe? JOE.
JOE NAMATH: [groggily] Who said that?
PRODUCER: Over here, Joe.
JOE NAMATH: [blinks his bleary eyes, spots the PRODUCER] Oh, hey, Doc.
PRODUCER: Actually, Joe, I’m a radio producer. You with us?
JOE NAMATH: Sure, sure. I got my bell rung pretty good at practice yesterday, that’s all. Forgot that Doc Parnell already checked me out and said I’m fine.
PRODUCER: That was yesterday?
JOE NAMATH: [takes a flask out of his breast pocket] I think so. Head still hurt this morning, so I figured I should medicate a li’l bit, you know? [knocks back a belt]
PRODUCER: Okay…
JOE NAMATH: So whazza game plan, coach?
PRODUCER: So this show is something new the station is trying out. It’s called “Request Line”. We’re going to take phone calls out here, and feed them in to you in the booth, and then you’ll take requests from the callers and we’ll play the records for them. So all you’ve got to do is chat with the listeners a little bit and we’ll…
As the PRODUCER has been speaking, JOE NAMATH’s eyes have gotten more heavy-lidded and he starts to fade.
PRODUCER: …take care of the rest. Joe? JOE.
JOE NAMATH: [eyes blink open for a fraction of a second] Just gotta get…some…
PRODUCER: We just need a theme for the week’s songs. Joe? You got a theme for us?
JOE NAMATH: …sleep…
—
Okay, you heard Broadway Joe, folks! This week’s theme is songs about SLEEP! I’ll get us started with a DOUBLE SHOT from the Beatles.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L9Wnh0V4HMM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBkiPtOm1V0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amJNTsfl8MU
I like math rock probably a little too much.
“ME TOO! Oh, wait, I thought you said something else…” – Ryan Leaf
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iuJr1-4u3XQ
Matt Cameron’s drumming is just so on point in this song.
Still miss you, Chris.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qj8ocvPEz2o
And when you come to from a bad dream, you’ll need a DOUBLE SHOT.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5vR1-PyXHfI
You brought this on yourself:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k0BWlvnBmIE
Yeah, I’ll give a half apology for the song, BUT NOT THE VIDEO.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wk3XSV6H6w0
Presumably Jake was sleeping:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8fI0JrZZzf0
And a DOUBLE SHOT looking for a bed:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sjCw3-YTffo
It’s always disappointed me that this isn’t Arrieta’s walk-out song.
In case this song list wasn’t white enough yet:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OQbokAE7DSA
DOUBLE SHOT (since he mentions a dream)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0klQIU2jtfo
a long nap?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2eBZqmL8ehg
sorry
/ not sorry
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8_cY1eUit7Q
Wow, that might be the worst thing I’ve ever heard, and I click on the songs Seamus posts.
does that make me better or worse than Seamus? lol
not sure if my posting privileges haven been revoked, or if I’m now on probation
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=td3bX6RF0lI
DOUBLE SHOT
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RumHTFUV7bA
Thanks for sending me down a productivity-killing Smashing Pumpkins rabbithole
How can anyone get any sleep in these conditions?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejorQVy3m8E
Quit making shit up
It’s not a good song per se, but it’s a definite member berry for me.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kmmPFrkuPq0
Make it a double shot:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j3QLFFVFpp0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TQ4dnJ8st2s
Apu singing this while washing his car is a favorite random Simpsons moment.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OPemyipJzAM
“Eh….spray the boy.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uqOrM_VkhtY
Don’t want Susanna Hoffs to get jealous, but I love Chrissie Hynde.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4HSmvcKSQ00
There is a LOT to work with here.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U2-Y9HJPSM0
Sometimes a DOUBLE SHOT just won’t do…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wauzrPn0cfg
And you gotta make it a TRIPLE.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w211KOQ5BMI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mgiCechWNCo
Had no idea Dan Hartman was deceased, let alone 23 years ago, let alone from an AIDS-related brain tumor. Damn.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=621Nk3Ubz4A
Yeah, you’re probably out of the woods by now, but I’d recommend that you get tested. Just to be safe.
If I remember my sex ed class, I don’t think the pitcher can get AIDS, so I should be good.
Not a song per se, but anyone with kids will appreciate this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Udj-o2m39NA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MetvfzyGBfY
OZZY DOUBLE SHOT
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vjWhOoT2h7w
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_rLXnvkOadY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N0Q9JWcxd_4
DOUBLE SHOT
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNycp5xIoWI
TRIPLE SHOT of Dr. Dog
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ox1nzBll2Jc
QUAD SHOT!
The Original-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vmQXmqbZ3Pc
A double, this time some clear rum-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MSDyiUBrUSk
Let’s make it a triple, but moonshine now-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YvNavReXi7U
Now I need something to smoke-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iN03URiSIrg
And if you guys don’t like what I’ve given you before, I’ll give you a smack-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZm96PKwtHc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tbU3zdAgiX8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KbuGWgYLqWk
These three ladies could sing the phone book and it would be wonderful.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=94h2L9oBOHM
Ooh, nice one.
I got to see Gillian Welch open for Norah Jones in ’03. I was hard for a week after.
“Hodor!”
– Andrew Luck
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IjObRFiJHOw
Some of the greatest bass work ever.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zuTaM5eTVeo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l9-NOIalUYU
I Guess I Should Go To Sleep – Jack White
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mr-NXf5id0I
Synth ZZ Top is proof that everyone in the 80s did a shitload of coke.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TKJymx2KDWo
There are so many.
Radiohead – Go To Sleep
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fe6X9fLLp0Y
I’m anticipating a decent number of new visitors popping down after Drew’s interview – so I thought I’d go with a rich topic. The other one under consideration was “crippling alcoholism”.
That could be Namath part deux
Was thinking Aldon Smith.
When is that interview running?
Sunday morning in my usual Sunday Gravy spot. Plus this gives me a week off from cooking. I’m grilling shit this weekend!
Too many cooks and all that, but might I suggest meat or vegetables instead?
SUPER DEPRESSING DOUBLE SHOT: Exit Music (For a Film) – Radiohead
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8051Hipbmmw
To Lay Me Down – Grateful Dead
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xcvng9u7REE
DOUBLE SHOT: Grateful Dead – Cumberland Blues
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zO-JEcuHrU4
Let’s make it a triple
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ti6bqCd58pI
You missed one: Beatles – I’m so tired
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bFwEcRqHJnA
“I’m so tired…”
– Albert Hayneworth, three seconds after the ball has been snapped.
Norwegian Wood fits too.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VPsEYpvnnRA
Phish – Sleep
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nnqSbvaLMTk
Sleep with the Phishes……
My Chemical Romance is good. Shut up. YOU’RE an emo.
/wipes tear, stains cheek with eyeliner
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RSAoJJzVXYY
Meanwhile, little Suzy Kolber has no idea what’s gonna happen in about 30 years or so…
FUCK! I should have named the intern “Sandra”.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SO1QUy-HTHQ
CANDY COLORED CLOWN!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TPqZs7Vl_xg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UNZbP3ZVem4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g73YPFDZuiw
Ok, I’ll take my last obvious one and show myself out:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_LBmUwi6mEo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=07Y0cy-nvAg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1pP5wRXkrgQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JBmpuWT7xjY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mcXYz0gtJeM
And the original:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=blI2dXHyBj0
“Texas. I mean, we crossed over into Oklahoma at around 4 a.m., but mostly Texas.”
– “Boxcar” Jim Tomsula
For what it’s worth, songs about dreams are on the board too.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z53HGc1_ea0
Feels obligatory:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F3WIHtOmkBg
Which sets up for the DOUBLE SHOT of Metallica
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CD-E-LDc384
This might put you to sleep, but it’s more because sometimes I take things too literally:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mW8Dyp-E7HQ