Darkest Timeline Zack Morris
DTZM escaped his dark timeline through a wormhole created by Lord Screech, after he destroyed Bayside for never allowing him to mate with Lisa Turtle. Zach now lives a quiet life in St. Louis with his wife, Darkest Timeline Kelly Kapowski. They have no children, but do have the world's cutest dogs.
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WCS

Cripes, this game is going to go 17 innings, and end with a 16-15 score.

Brick Meathook
Sill Bimmons

Tough luck LA except not so much HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Sill Bimmons

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Sill Bimmons

JUNG HO KANGOGI

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Sill Bimmons

oh yes

Sill Bimmons
Sill Bimmons

Oh HELLS YEAH!!!

Horatio Cornblower

I root for the Yankees but I could watch McCutcheon play baseball every day.

And now that they’re not a total shitstorm I almost can!

IronAvenger6491

Same

mclamb86

All right, all right, all right, time to Rivebrog!

Oh…………….

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Sill Bimmons

FUCKIN’ A CUTCH WOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Beastmode Ate My Baby
Horatio Cornblower

You might say we’re the Pele of rivebrogging.

Horatio Cornblower

Jesus Pirates stop hitting them, the Dodgers are already dead!

Horatio Cornblower

Signing off for the night folks. Great getting back at this, especially given the demise of KSK. Once again big thanks to DTZM for making it possible.

Sill Bimmons

HE REALLY KNOCKED THE CRAP OUT OF THAT ONE WOOOOOOOOO

IronAvenger6491

Congrats DTZM, i think it was a success.

Horatio Cornblower

Agreed, big props to DTZM.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Big time. DTZM saved us all from becoming a reclusive band of shut-ins and miscreants.

laserguru

/nods head

//cracks open beer

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Off to find food-like substance. Great to rivebrog with you guys, and huge thanks to DTZM for making this all possible!

http://lazysundaymag.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/Archer6.gif

Sill Bimmons

Come on Starling…….

Horatio Cornblower

Well he didn’t exactly hit the shit out of it, but that’ll do nicely.

laserguru

He’s on my fantasy team!

Covalent Blonde

Nicely done, DTZM! Nicely done. Great work on the rivebrog!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Rick and Morty rivebrog?

Horatio Cornblower

I can’t live blog that; you miss too much. At least I do because my fat fingers don’t type too well.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Not volunteering, but I will share this link to last week’s song: http://www.avclub.com/article/listen-goodbye-moonmen-rick-and-morty-its-entirety-223518

IronAvenger6491

I’m making my way through the last Deadpool series by Posehn and Duggan. It’s pretty fun.

KidFlash

My library has the first two TPBs of Posehn’s run. My inner 12-year old thought it was spectacular. Like Police Squad with violence and gore.

Sill Bimmons
laserguru

I’m watching this shit.

What’s really strange is I live in L.A. and I can never see the Dodgers. They have this stupid dick measuring contest with ComCast and as a Directv subscriber they block out every Dodger game except the national feeds.

I almost forgot they were there.

I will be there live in person when my Cubbies come out to visit in a couple of weeks.
We’re seeing two games and maybe all three.
That “W” flag’s gotta fly!

laserguru

Nobody. The Comcast viewership is small and they are betting that this big dollar drop to be the Dodger exclusive is going to pay. So far L.A. is saying fuck off. We are so goddamn taxed out here most people are fed up.

My biggest complaint is I don’t get to hear the dulcet tones of Vin Scully.
Fuck Comcast.

ballsofsteelandfury

There’s always radio…

WCS

Six-run inning for the Pirates?

http://i.imgur.com/OfYGY.gif

WCS

How about those Battlin’ Buccos?!

/ducks thrown office furniture

Horatio Cornblower

Couldn’t have gone with “DODGES thrown office furniture” and go for the horrible pun too.

Also Puig is a moron.

Covalent Blonde

Well, I feel denied a frog stomping…
http://cdn3.vox-cdn.com/assets/4982364/karatesteeler.0.gif

WCS

I get knocked down
I don’t get up again
You know they’re always gonna keep me down

IronAvenger6491

Never Forget

IronAvenger6491

Oh man, they should ask Dungy what he thought about the gays being allowed to marry.

Sill Bimmons

They asked.

The result was in the negative.

Curse of Marino

It was fun kommenting with you all once again.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Absolutely.

Brick Meathook
IronAvenger6491

Wait…when did Ape leave KsK?

Horatio Cornblower

7/31. Black Friday II.

Most of the other writers quit the same day, but the good news is Johnny Sugar stuck around.

laserguru

I was thinking about an Argentinian Malbec. Glass of Red.

Anybody need a glass?

Horatio Cornblower

I’m not that fancy; we can share the straw.

IronAvenger6491

Why is it that they always put teams that don’t have any current future hall of famers out during the Hall of Fame game.

Also, better yet, it should be the old timers fighting to the death for a spot in the real HoF.

KidFlash

In the past, the two teams were quite literally pulled out of a hat. I’ve got a preview magazine from 1981 that had the future matchups through 1987, I think.

Nowadays, they should announce the pairing on the same day of the HOF inductees. Pick two of the teams represented by that year’s class and go from there.

Defensive Back Mike Wallace
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Hamburger bun or beef curtain style?

Either is fine for me.

ballsofsteelandfury

Both

King Hippo

Per Covalent’s point on the prior page, good songs I have counted on NBC’s cutaways:

“Fever” by The Black Keys
“Ain’t Gonna Fight No More” by Alabama Shakes (from Philip Rivers’ hometown!)
“Greek Tragedy” by The Wombats

Covalent Blonde

Look at the evolution of homophobia there!

Sill Bimmons

DATA

The word isn’t pronounced “DAH-tah.”

It’s pronounced “DAY-tah.”

The plural of “DAY-tum.”

Curse of Marino

what about da cum?

laserguru

You are absolutely 100% goddamn correct.
And thank you for pointing this out.

Always stuck in my craw from a programmers point.

See kids! You learned something!

Curse of Marino

Al Michaels cracks a joke about short term memory IMMEDIATELY after explaining that Tinglehoff suffers from it. Perfect. Too perfect.

Covalent Blonde

We have basketball, golf, and hunting. What sports am I missing that Cris has mumbled through outside of football?

IronAvenger6491

I have no idea who that is.

Horatio Cornblower

That makes two of us. Pretty sure she wouldn’t recognize me either.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

The bartender just told me that they have a loyalty program here where if you come to the bar 240 times, then you can bring in any mug up to 40 ounces, and they’ll keep it for you to fill up for the same price as a pint. Challenge accepted.

Horatio Cornblower

240 times in all or 240 times in one night? This seems like an important question.

laserguru

I like this place

Covalent Blonde

I’m not sure I’ve been anywhere 240 times.

Horatio Cornblower

I’m a regular at the brew pub downtown, (i.e., I’m an alcoholic, but classy), and they have Stein Night on Sundays. If I don’t have to work Mondays I’ll go down for a couple. 22 oz. is the supposed fill lines but they’ll fill mine 3/4, and it’s a genuine Munich Oktoberfest stein. That I stole from my brother.

The lesson, kids, is tip your servers well.

laserguru

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NehZl_X3hjQ

Of course rock and roll could use a saxophone.

Hesh you down.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NehZl_X3hjQ

Curse of Marino

“He waited 37 years to get in the Hall of Fame….Because the Voters are assholes”

laserguru

Damn right.

Damn right.

Mick was the man.

KidFlash

Says something about the state of American soccer at the time that TNT had him do color commentary for their 1990 World Cup coverage.

(I swear he was a color guy for WLAF telecasts as well.)

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Steelers comin’ to the CLink this year.

http://i.imgur.com/ySWKq.gif

laserguru
Brick Meathook

Is Tony Dungy going to be in the booth for the rest of the season or just this game? I never usually listen to halftime shows so I never really appreciated how awful he is.

Horatio Cornblower

He’ll probably be in the booth all season because Tony is never gonna come out of a closet-like space.

IronAvenger6491

Holy fuck, Fantastic Four bombed so hard.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Kate Mara as…well…anyone?

Horatio Cornblower

You say what you want about Fantastic Four sir, but not one word about Kate Mara. She is delightful!

http://www.strangecelebrities.com/images/content/141722.jpg

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Ehhhhh…kind of an awful actress.

Like bad. Really, really bad.

IronAvenger6491

The only good that will come from this, is Fox giving the rights back to Marvel.

I want to see Galactus throws hands with Thanos.

Also Silver Surfer and maybe Secret Invasion.

KidFlash

I’ll go to bat for the earlier films’ use of the Surfer. Hell, if they want to bring back Doug Jones and Laurence Fishburne, I’m game for it.

Galactus… not so much. Although I have no idea how to make the character not look ridiculous onscreen.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

That may happen, but…Fox is so incredibly “fuck you” toward Marvel these days that they may just hang on to the rights out of spite.

KidFlash

Thing is, the movie bombed so badly and the press is so toxic right now that Fox may figure selling the rights back would make more than any potential future FF adaptation.

That, and they could dangle the rights for the ability to make an X-Men TV series, which was mentioned this week.

KidFlash

Indeed.

Random question: how do we fix the timestamp so that it lines up with our time zone? Can that be done?

KidFlash

Gotcha.

Horatio Cornblower

KSK live blog had 43 comments. 5 were from the moderator fighting with commenters, (I retired the k).

We’re at 416.

Ladies. Gentlemen, Well done.

King Hippo

Res ipsa loquitor muthafuckas

IronAvenger6491

Does it deserve a viking funeral?

Horatio Cornblower

Valhalla motherfucker.

Horatio Cornblower

Maybe it’s the three years in law school but I don’t feel bad at all.

One reaps what one sows.

King Hippo

Karma is a bitch.

Curse of Marino

“and then you gotta flip the switch”

*Camera pans to Adrian Peterson.*

Really?

Curse of Marino

So this may be the booze but, I’d bang Sydney Seau.

IronAvenger6491

Sweet, new Rick and Morty tonight.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

My fantasy team this year is called the Turbulent Juicers.

KidFlash

I went with Mitchell’s Marauders. The pic I used was of Joe Don Baker.

Horatio Cornblower

So we still doing this thing?

Reaction to ‘True Detective’ tomorrow will be…interesting.

aceg

Bully Pulpit for Love… I give you your new fantasy football name. Yes.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Bully Pulpit for Love: Brought to You by James Dungy

burritobongo

Watching the Steelers brings me back to the moment I feel in love with you gutter snipes. http://uproxx.com/ksk/2011/01/haters-guide-to-the-postseason-pittsburgh-steelers-afc-2nd-seed/
Of course Uproxx has omitted the huge anus close-up background that made me lmao.

ballsofsteelandfury

I really wanted to use that for my Steelers preview, but I could not find it anywhere.

KidFlash

So, uh, any of you have anything to do with the renaming of the author of that post? Or was it a shot by Ape walking out the door with his finest Stone Cold Salute?

Sill Bimmons

All over but the crying foar teh Bucs tonight:

http://gifl.ink/dawson.gif

King Hippo

Genuflect before thine Cardinals jorts-wearing overlords!