A Selection Of Phrases From Recent Posts That Would Make Good Excerpts From Snooty Wine Tasting Notes

“…arbitrary and sanctimonius…”

“…a long way down from the unrelenting quality of…”

“…this two-year vet that’s just aching to blossom…”

“…its transient, opaque identity…”

“…the juggernaut that was the 1994…”

“…sometimes, geography was the science…”

“…dark, foreboding, and imposing…”

“…ranked really, really, high, and I can’t quite figure out why…”

“…scorched brussels sprouts…”

“…outright olfactory torture…”

“…the final round brought plenty of unexpected surprises…”

“…just a taste of what you’ll be seeing this year…”

“…significant change in seasonal weather extremes…”

“…I was nostalgically transported back to a more innocent time in my life…”

“…a rich panoply of reds…”

“…needs to get their legion of young players out of the cellar…”

“…you need to pace yourself and keep track of your consumption, because you could easily destroy this entire thing singlehandedly and live to regret it…”

WhyEaglesWhy

Do you like football? Do you like nachos? Well, why don’t you come over and watch the game with Why Eagles Why and we’ll have some nachos, then some beer.
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UDFAMartintheeWeeBabySeamusMarc Trestmans Windowless Vanballsofsteelandfury Recent comment authors
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ballsofsteelandfury

Late Night Open Thread post is up! More pics there!

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

This comment meant to have a sad half where it hugged my puppy

(NSFW)

h
ttp://40.media.tumblr.com/fea98c5fadc1953319fa16b0397cb55f/tumblr_n6g7ki79Vp1tc4jg0o1_500.jpg This is a pic that has nothing to do that

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Sorry, second I need hipppo to NSFW it

theeWeeBabySeamus

She looks smart.

King Hippo

It pained me to have to NSFW it. I stared as long as I could while the edit processed.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Why would you lie to me? Still not putting on pants

theeWeeBabySeamus

Totes understandable.

King Hippo

OH NOES, MACK BROWN!! KILL IT WITH FIRE!!!!!

theeWeeBabySeamus

Stake to the heart, less collateral damage.

WCS

BWAHAAHAHAHAH fuck The U.

makeitsnowondem

Getting drunk sounds pretty appealing, but I’ll be damned if I have the energy for it tonight.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

At this point I just have no pants

King Hippo

Miami and FAU could get shithouse crunk, nobody would be able to tell after this first half of derp.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I got 2 pics now, Yeah I should thank Jesus

http://filthyginger.tumblr.com/post/128786745130/let-me-gnaw-on-her-bones

NSFW anywhere
h
ttp://40.media.tumblr.com/fea98c5fadc1953319fa16b0397cb55f/tumblr_n6g7ki79Vp1tc4jg0o1_500.jpg

WCS

Is that Ellie Kemper?

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I love you and will always find a way to make you happy. Sorry, it wasn’t her

blordinaryfagicmox
blordinaryfagicmox

It seems the terrible jersey font disease has spread from Tampa to Miami. Hopefully rising ocean levels wipe out both places before it can spread.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I will get just fucking shitty drunk tool

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I refuse to put pants back on. I think this is gonna come back to me.

King Hippo

If Jeebus wanted you to wear pants, He would have made them seem like a better fucking idea, now, wouldn’t He?

ballsofsteelandfury

The second I walked into the house, I took off my pants. Have not worn anything over my undies since.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I am just on board right away

yeah this isnt SFW

h ttp://33.media.tumblr.com/65642911ae1d8a448dd631ebea5b1853/tumblr_noe9n1dBMm1rkjnngo1_250.gif

ballsofsteelandfury

I am hypnotized by that gif.

Martin

Good ol’ Katee Owen

King Hippo

If anyone had doubts, it appears Da U is da shitty again.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Golf Channel just one tick over from FS1 on DirecTV. LPGA on now, spending more time there than on DaU vs Owls.

WCS

Something called “FAU” just tied THE U, 17-17. Michael Irvan just snorted a kilo of coke in shame.

Game is on FS1. Friday night foobaw is awesome.

King Hippo

Seems both ESPN and FS1 have tried to boost the Friday schedules a bit this season. I am excite.

Also like how this upsets 60+ white Texans who think we should be paying attention to our local high school games.

WCS

There’s a certain level of hell specifically reserved for anyone who watches and/or promotes high school football on national television. TWWL has done PLENTY of horrible, just deplorable things, but their “National High School Game of the Week” is undeniably in the top-five.

blordinaryfagicmox
blordinaryfagicmox

well there was that one game, Im glad we have footage of that

blordinaryfagicmox
blordinaryfagicmox

WCS

A classic. That said, wasn’t a national broadcast, though, I guess I could’ve given this one a pass.

blordinaryfagicmox
blordinaryfagicmox

Why does Matt Leinart sound like an old guy from Philly though?

King Hippo

Lots of pubic hair in his throat, I’d assume.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Oh jeez, that is just wrong. Funny, but wrong.
Made me throw up in my mouth a little, even.

ballsofsteelandfury

Also wrong in the sense that there is no way any of the girls he hooks up with have any pubic hair.

Martin

You’re confusing him with Nacho. Easy mistake—USC QBs who are undeserving of even making it to the NFL.

Martin

Irvin would’ve snorted that kilo if The U was winning. Or losing. Or on a bye week.

UDFA
UDFA

Or if was the College world series.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I am in no way sober. I am on team lets see some naked people

h
ttp://40.media.tumblr.com/fea98c5fadc1953319fa16b0397cb55f/tumblr_n6g7ki79Vp1tc4jg0o1_500.jpg

This would have got posted but never did

ballsofsteelandfury

Go Team Go!

blordinaryfagicmox
blordinaryfagicmox

“… so I says, ’10 year Scotch, 12 year Scotch, they all end up the same color in the end.’ “

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Yeah I am just drunk at this point. Pissed off my tumbler site is all blocked. It was the redheads I owed you so this is on me.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Thongs (and yoga pants) are a double edged sword and should not be used by everyone.
She is using hers just fine though.

Next!

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Again I am perfectly fine wasting my entire birthday. If I instead wasted it posted naked women I would be more ok w that

King Hippo

At 42 – and I can only imagine this will get more so with time – my perfect birthday is to be left the fuck alone and for the annoying platitudes and phone calls to be kept to a bare minimum. I don’t like gifts and I most definitely hate parties.

25 is really the last WOO!!! birthday.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Yeah I am still just an asshole. But thanks

blordinaryfagicmox
blordinaryfagicmox

The worst part about about hating birthdays is that it only comes up on someone else’s birthday and you feel kind’ve like a dick for mentioning all the reasons birthdays suck.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I am just the worst on my Bday, you want another pic? I am all for it

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I am not wearing pants anymore. I still think I owe you like 4 pics.Redheads, asian, where should I go?

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I really got shit going on. Have another pic.

http://41.media.tumblr.com/76870ed84f78a6157a9031133
5fee74/tumblr_nu35qhKdIK1tbs59no1_1280.png

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
King Hippo

perfect shoulders. me likey

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Fuck it you get one I will fail at explaining

h_ttp://41.media.tumblr.com/f2c92b4bdcf4f81e3643ae5050196359/tumblr_nuhjevsix01tqfgago1_1280.jpg

or I will just post another random pic

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I meant NSFW on that one. The followup was gonna be 10x worse. Or that was my plan

Martin

“We’ve replaced MTWV with Fek. Let’s see if anyone notices.”

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Yeah, that was on me. I can post a shit ton of half/naked ladies if you need.

blordinaryfagicmox
blordinaryfagicmox

Battle of Utah tonight on the deuce. The polygamists vs the people so fat they had to salt up one of their lakes so they could float in it and feel better than skinny people who can’t float.

King Hippo

So much Wonder Bread and Sprite in that matchup! But it could end up entertaining, especialy if 10th year QB Chuckie Keeton is still leading the Aggies.

Anything to keep me away from the baseball suckage,

ballsofsteelandfury

Don’t forget the mayo.

– Joe Flacco

Lothar of the Hill People
Lothar of the Hill People

SLC has some very good brewpubs.

And a terrible homeless problem.

Neither one you typically associate with the LDS.

And yeah, I’d move to SLC in a heartbeat.

King Hippo

SLC itself is very cool and somewhat liberal. It’s just the weirdos are firmly in charge of the surrounding area and the rest of the state.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I am catching up on Colbert still but since I went out for a cig after I missed a sunshine filled rainfall. It merits a pic

http://40.media.tumblr.com/adfedc1001363e0465bf1bddf8cc924b/tumblr_nuc9i9Vqni1rj4j4jo1_1280.jpg

I really don’t have a better way to spend my birthday in case anyone wants to judge. I spent most of it waiting to sign for a replacement cell phone for my mom when she walked 4 miles to pick up her car and playing fetch with her dog. Drunken pics is an improvement.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I think you’re hurting Sexy Friday’s feelings…

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

BTW if it makes you feel better I once spent Thanksgiving alone watching an X-Files marathon.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I love you think that will make me happy. I mean it is right but whatever.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I am interested now. I want X-flles eps you like

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Triangle” was my favorite of the bunch. “Small Potatoes” was very entertaining as well.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I know that was off topic. I really am gonna watch that ep though

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Triangle has some really neat split-screen stuff. And Small Potatoes was written by Vince Gilligan.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I really might just spend the next 45 min watching it. Vince is a fucking treasure

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
blaxabbath

goddamn this site produces a lot of #content.

King Hippo

It is a stated goal of the Most Glorious Manifesto to break the entire internet.

Lothar of the Hill People
Lothar of the Hill People

Didn’t Kim Kardashian’s greasy ass in a garbage bag do that?

King Hippo

shudders uncontrollably for a few hours just knowing that said nightmare fuel exists

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It’s been a very busy Friday.

ballsofsteelandfury

But a good one.