Let’s do some games…
Atl @ Dal: Cowboys QB play should be wince-ertaining. Wouldn’t it be great if Dez threw a tantrum while watching from the sidelines? Falcons CB Trufant should take Williams out of the game leaving Potden with…Dunbar out of the backfield? Witten might be able to do something I guess. The other JJ, the one that doesn’t embarrass himself on a near weekly basis, Julio Jones, just keeps rolling along.
Ind @ Ten: This is where the Colts O busts out, right? They did play against two above average D’s (Bills, Jets)- not that that should be an excuse but I thought Luck was better than that. Mariotta has thrown 6 TD’s with no picks at this point but hey, it’s early. There’s plenty of time to come back down to earth.
Cle @ Oak: The Raiders showed some moxy last week, transferring their impending loss over to the Ravens with only seconds to spare. Now they’re off to see the wizard, uh, Browns. Oakland has lost 19 of their last 20 road games which is impressive and not surprising simultaneously. Browns are down to just 3 DB’s-Pierre Desir (no relation to Pierre Garcon) is to play opposite Haden. At QB McCown is up to bat.
Cin @ Bal: Bengals are 2-0? How’d that get past me? Oh yeah, I don’t care. Surprisingly it’s Eifert leading the team in receiving but I’ve no doubt that Green will speed by soon. Perhaps as early as today. The Ravens #1 corner, Jimmy Smith has given up 10 catches on 16 targets for 141 yards. That’s not what a shutdown gets paid for. Flacco’s buddies in the passing game not named Smith include the likes of Kamar Aiken and Crockett Gillmore. If that’s the case I’m leaning towards Cincy in this one.
Jax @ NE: I hate New England-just putting that out there. That said, this game is a foregone conclusion and the Pats will be 3-0 because there is so much evil in the world.
NO @ Car: Use the running game, Luke! That thing featuring Ingram and Spiller? That one that’s mediocre at best? Yeah, that one. Kuechly is out again but NO is a fat mess right now so it doesn’t much matter. Carolina rolls easy here.
Phi @ NYJ: Philly needs this one desperately and may be without Murray’s complete lack of production. That Kiko Alonso trade has paid huge dividends [makes wanking motion] He’s out after making 7 tackles in two games. Could we see Geno? Probably not but we may not see Decker, Revis and Ivory either. The Jets have forced 10 TO’s in the last two weeks! All hail the Jets DC who is…Kacy Rodgers? Never heard of the guy.
TB @ Hou: This is the sort of game that the average football fan, realizing it’s his only option, would say to himself, “TB/Houston? What did I do to deserve this? [pauses for a moment] Actually, perhaps I should stop masturbating to mental images of that cashier at the drug store that I think might be 18 or so. It’s so hard to tell these days.”
SD @ Min: Covered by Yeah Right.
Pit @ StL: Not sure what to make of this game. The Rams should be able to get after Ben and put pressure on the potent passing game but Bell is back and should have a big one. Gurley is scheduled to play but it sounds like he is hobbled. Hmm. I’ll take the Steelers wearing down the StL D and pulling away in the 4th.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/a1dc7965006bd70fabc5bc6feb33409e/tumblr_nrc6pz9p481qcma3zo1_1280.jpg
Big Ben hurt. Big Ben no can rape no more. Big Ben no do good.
http://giant.gfycat.com/ThatScentedBirdofparadise.gif
That’s his thrusting leg, too.
This whole “Let’s leave Julio wide open” game plan doesn’t work.
Who, who, Julio.*
*dated Phil Collins reference
THE BEN HAS LEG OWIE
Holding.
http://36.media.tumblr.com/3265f83a6fdfe395b86ea4a5325577ef/tumblr_ns2d72Lgdm1swtg58o1_1280.jpg
I’d like to hold her. In a consentual, non-creepy manner……
Falcons FB DeMarco is the best DeMarco in the league right now.
DePolo.
Touchdown.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/6145d087056aa20798174fb6c7cfaaa4/tumblr_mfrnlh3YiJ1r0jbeto1_400.jpg
http://38.media.tumblr.com/3182ee1f3935aaac75b36a982aa606f9/tumblr_nugufoECDz1sa11jco1_540.gif
goddammit Jaguras
Okay, who replaced Andrew Luck with RG3 painted white?
The source, you should watch.
https://youtu.be/45boXIgXFUQ
http://giant.gfycat.com/GlossyFabulousBlackandtancoonhound.gif
Colts implosion imminent.
Their hearts do that a few times a day.
BAD HODOR
Up here in The Canada, I can’t get enough Quantico ads. This show is gonna rock!
http://giant.gfycat.com/CorruptScarceAidi.gif
As much as I appreciate the gif, the former volleyball player in me is critical. You don’t have different calls based on how many hands you have behind your back. If you did, the other team would know your play based on how many hands you’re using.
They’re playing a sport? First I’ve noticed of it
Always two hands.
Volleyball porn is best porn.
Viva la raza!!!
Holy fuck. Dalton makes some good throws, driving down the field, then channels his inner Andy Dalton and derps an INT in the end zone.
NOSOULCEPTION
Gingerception
http://giant.gfycat.com/YellowishDifferentDalmatian.gif
she seems nice
juuuuuussssssst a bit offside
http://giant.gfycat.com/GloomyEnergeticEarthworm.gif
Some things are just universal…
Sean Lee: defensive leader or defensive BLEEDER?
Leader on the Injury Report, Bleeder on the Field.
$5 Pizza Hut pizza-you get what you pay for…
Sean Lee: “NO ONE MAKES ME BLEED MY OWN BLOOD… NOBODY!”
I got a few more
http://giant.gfycat.com/NecessaryImmenseAfricanparadiseflycatcher.gif
VIVA!!
What the heck is this from? A commercial or something?
Rivers just went full Marmalard on his o-line.
http://eighties.weebly.com/uploads/7/4/6/1/746191/297100.gif
Ragnar weeps
http://memecrunch.com/meme/EUZJ/foosball-is-the-devil/image.png
Is The Flash worth a looky-loo?
Pretty fun show!
Who?
Philip Rivers is playing like several of his kids out there!
I think the Ravens could end up getting swept in the division. Hell, I think they might win less than 6 games.
FlaccOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOO
It’s going to be so sad when Dalton looks absolutely listless in the 1st Bengals playoff game after going 12-4.
You get used to it
It’s always fun seeing the bandwagon Bengals fans get psyched for the playoffs, and then so sad after they’re one-and-done.
I think I’ll masturbate at halftime in honor of the Ravens.
They been jerking each other off all day.
So that all happened…
To celebrate Hispanic Heritage Month:
http://i.imgur.com/XKZCLAi.gifv
I couldn’t possibly watch that all the damn day long.
VIVA MEXICO
TWO of the good ones??
Ha!
How did Pit/StL beat Phi/NYJ to the half?
I think daylight savings time has something to do with it. That or the Illuminati.
Whoever is in charge of pregame pyrotechnics at the Edward Jones Dome decided to feel a little arsony. The field was set on fire, took about 30 minutes to repair.
That happens at every game in Oakland, but nobody has noticed it yet.
Raiders?
JETS!!!!!!!!!!!! Fuck da Eagles!
I don’t know guys, but, I think this Antonio Brown guy might just be halfway decent at this thing.
Brandon Marshall is a dickhead.
Which one?
To celebrate Hispanic Heritage Month, I’m throwing away my box of condoms.
#NAWTRAYCESS!
Are we sure it’s Falcons-Cowboys and not Georgia-Texas A&M?
Mother fucker, Freeman is having a hell of a game
Dri Archer: Still pointless
Earth: Still orbiting sun
How is Steelers-Rams caught up already???
“Celebrate Hispanic Heritage Month!”*
*not sponsored in any way by the Republican Party. Seriously, we hate all of them even the rare ones that work hard and don’t rape our women
http://cdn.meme.am/instances/500x/52758796.jpg
What do you have to say, Canada Boy?
If Scott Walker hadn’t dropped out we’d be breaking ground on a wall to keep you fuckers out this time next year!
That wall functions as a way to you fuckers out as well. #winwin
*keep
*in