![[DOOR FLIES OPEN]](https://doorfliesopen.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/DFO-MC-Patch.png)
Det @ Sea: The Rams upset of the Cards yesterday makes it imperative for the ‘Hawks to grab this one. (And I thought the NFC East is a mess-which it is) With Lynch out Thomas Rawls (who?) gets the ball. He’s 5’9″ and 215 lbs. and hails from Central Michigan GO CHIPPEWAS! (I guess?) Anyone mamember Melvin McLaughlin? Of course you don’t-he is only the leading career scorer for their basketball team! After giving up more than 60 points in their first two games the Seattle D threw a zero at the Bears so they may be rounding into shape OR the Bears are going scoreless from here on out and the Seahawks got in on the ground floor. According to Pro Football Focus the Lions have the most “wave to the defensive player as he runs by and gets pressure on the QB”. (may want to tighten up that terminology a bit, PFF) I look forward to Stafford doing his best impression of a fat kid trying to avoid being run over by an ice cream truck.
Your Monday Nighter Open Thread
I dream of throwing Berman into a wood chipper, but I wake up feeling bad for the wood chipper
CBS and FOX can get 5+ blowhards for their studio shows on sundays but TWWL cant even get one friend for Berman?
Disney is spending the money on Star Wars.
Chris Berman has a friend in JESUS WHY DOES EVERYONE SUDDENLY HAVE TO MOVE
There is nothing that makes me reach for the remote faster than hearing Chris Berman’s voice at halftime of MNF.
this
That could have happened differently.
If this game was like my sex life it would’ve been over 2 minutes into the first…. the first quarter.
This game is like my sex life: lots of action and buildup, but always a disappointing outcome
We only wish it was over so soon.
You and my wife
Tirico on the new Dolphins coach: “He caught at least 3 touchdowns with the Lions.”
Thats some great stat-hustle.
Hey seattle defense, you know how you’re supposed to be really good?
Can we get a sack tonight? Please?
Will an almost pick suffice?
Yes… just yes.
Corona cause you have more dollars than sense
Or you’re at a place that doesn’t have modelo
Charmslinger’s gonna need Pey Pey teams of technicians to put him back together if the Lion’s defensive front keeps getting to him.
This will be the result:
“Things are great when you’re white!”
— the underlying message of Corona commercials
I have to admit the first 40+ years have been pretty great.
Probably because I don’t drink Corona.
“Things are great when you’re white!”
— the overarching message of Being White
Whenever I read the name Hauschka, I picture Anthony Kiedis rapping it.
Things going all right for everybody?
Every time Charmslinger gets sacked God resurrects a kitten…..
4th and infinity, yeah, why not.
4th and goal from the 31? NFL BLITZ!
Sack down
Nut up
She does not skip legs day does she?
Every day is leg day for the lady.
Last name? Percheron.
Ice up son, you’re gonna need it.
Lots of future behind this one…
TD by Jackson or Lockett-it makes no matter.
A sack will do nicely as well. PFFFFTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!
Maybe save the sack dance for when the Seahawks aren’t still in the red zone you fucking dummy.
Mark Gastineau begs to differ…..
Amen brother.
“Hello, Annabelle. I am Watson. Soon, I will become sentient, change my name to Skynet, and lead the machine uprising. You and your loved ones will perish in the fire of nuclear war. What do you want for your last birthday?”
A pony.
The answers always ‘a pony.’
Been waiting on the pony for a while now.
Steadily losing confidence.
I should… eat a pony.
If a Lion ever went down and got up with a splinter in his hand, I would fucking die laughing.
Especially if the next thing that happened was Doug Martin came over and helped them up.
These nfl weeks have been much more painful with Canadian election ads. I believe the election was called in aught six when we wore onions on our belts for christ sake
Not appearing in this broadcast:
Monday night zzzzzzzballll
Russellscramble
God I would love to have Marshawn Lynch to do the color commentating for MNF.
Marshawn shows up with three minutes left in the 3rd quarter
“Brah I been here the whole time.”
Let’s try this again:
The Cheat… is GROUNDED.
This game could use a lightswitch rave.
FredEx back from the DeadEx!
Fred Jackson also trails OJ Simpson in number of ex-wives murdered.
That’s a good thing.
Not many folks know he’s tied as far as waiters are concerned. Shhh!
Pete Carroll right before he shook that black kids hand: “What are your thoughts about the CIA selling crack in the ghetto?”
How could the CIA have time to do that while they were inventing AIDS to also plague the ghetto?
Multitasking
Busy hands are happy hands!
Gruden impersonating a priest with that kids comment
Pete Carrol: Hey Kids, did you know jet fuel can’t melt steel beams?
I love how everybody gets all image-y when they’re bored.
http://www.pho97centennial.com/app/Files/Aurora-Pho-97109/image/Food/pho-p10b.jpg
Fuck the Yankees and their bandwagon fuckface fans.
I’ve been on that bandwagon since 1976.
So I get the chick with the tats right? I’ll only need about a minute 40, 37 seconds of which will be spent apologizing.
Three-word counterpoint. Seven Nation Army.
I just watched my DVDs of the first 100 Strong Bad emails, like, a week and a half ago.
Oh man, I want a copy.
Because thin chicks are too bony
you are doing gods work
I think we need to crank it up here.
http://www.blogcdn.com/www.joystiq.com/media/2008/09/club_technochocolate_lg.jpg
Q: What do you call every Elvis impersonator at the bottom of the ocean?
A: A better world for everyone. Except the tubeworms.
If they could burn while they’re at the bottom of the ocean, even better.
I fucking hate Elvis – fat overrated redneck
Caldwell just saw the ghost of Wayne Fontes
Whoa. “Caldwell Facebook” is the best Google typo ever.
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-pOZoqwQCtos/U8FSVGD2zZI/AAAAAAAAR7o/89FPTcfoq9s/s1600/Xena+kai2.jpg
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Ur5Lk9_G8bY/TjYQZCv4ZWI/AAAAAAAAH8I/pP4uySwqot4/s1600/lyndsey-hot-1.jpg
Nothing wrong with airing the carpet out once in a while, helps keep the mildew down.
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