Dean Blandino Consults the Orb of Officiating

MikeWallaceAndGromit

MikeWallaceAndGromit

DFO’s resident gamer of the video and board variety.
MikeWallaceAndGromit

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[Dean Blandino, High Priest of the Flag God, addresses his flock of Beergh worshipers deep below NFL Headquarters]

FlagGod2

Brothers, I would like to honor one of our number today. On Sunday, Acolyte Coleman had the wisdom to consult with our holy seers during his officiating of the Bears vs. Lions game.  After receiving the wisdom of the Orb of Officiating, it was ruled Golden Tate once again made a touchdown reception in a play that to the eyes of blaspheming heretics, was clearly not.

This event may seem commonplace, but today I wish to conduct the Ritual of Review, that we may remind ourselves of Beergh’s wisdom.

Flags for the Flag God!

FLAGS FOR THE FLAG GOD!

[Blandino turns to a carved statue of Beergh’s terrifying visage. Reaching inside one of the statue’s eye sockets, he removes a glowing orb of unspeakable power.]

Now Brothers, let us go Under the Hood.

[Each monk flips up the hood of his ocher colored robe. Muttering incantations the mortal tongue was not meant to form, High Priest Blandino vigorously shakes the Orb of Officiating.]

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MikeWallaceAndGromit
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BeerguyrobMoose -The End Is Well NighballsofsteelandfuryHoratio Cornblowermake it snow Recent comment authors
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
ballsofsteelandfury

That’s very nicely done!

Don T

Indisputable is the new Inconceivable.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Indubitably

Horatio Cornblower

Incontrovertably.

King Hippo

The post made the “TOUCHDOWN SEAHAWKS!” joke before I could.

/started Tate in my money league!!

//still lost by 41 🙁

BrettFavresColonoscopy

As a Bears fan, I say too soon.

King Hippo

It serves you right for also liking the el beisbol version imo ,, smgdh

His Right Honorable Lord Lordship the Lordly

I hope this series ends with Blandino falling to his death to be stomped on by Defensive Lineman and DBs angered by years of bullshit roughing the passer and defensive holding calls.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

So I was about to make a joke about him getting killed by alligator-armed wide receivers, and I learned that the term does not actually mean what I thought it did.

Actual meaning is to not reach out for the ball. I always assumed it meant to clap your arms together (kind of like a seal) and have the ball fly right between them.

makeitsnowondem

This is exactly what I thought the phrase meant too.

ballsofsteelandfury

That’s what you get for being a Raiders fan.

Sharkbait

Brothers and sisters of the Yellow Flag,

Trust not the Red Flag, for it is a false prophet and angers the Flag God.

Hail Beergh.

His Right Honorable Lord Lordship the Lordly

The Red Flag Protects

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD FLAG GOD!”

– Lovie Smith

Bugg
Bugg

Must be great to have a job that allows you to make it the fuck up.

blaxabbath

DFO is paying now?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I assumed he meant the zebras…

Doktor Zymm

“Ruling Hazy try again”

Beerguyrob

Maybe try consulting a different 8-ball?

http://i.imgur.com/Auv2V7v.jpg

The outlook might become crystal clear.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

God. Every time I look at that it gets worse. What they saw there was considered CLEAR VISUAL EVIDENCE enough to overturn the original call. It’s insane.

blaxabbath

Visual evidence? If America’s Most Watched Network has taught me anything, it’s that DNA swabs are the only way to go about getting something right. Else, a rapist walks.