Den @ SD: QB Osweiler has won his first two starts (tries to beat pundits to the punch) thanks to the extraordinary coaching he’s getting from The Peyton. The Chargers beat the Jags last week to halt a six game skid. Now they’re up against Denver and it’s time to embrace another L. Perhaps the Bolts fan site that I visited should take a cue from a Niners site-start examining the teams that are jockeying for the #1 pick in the 2016 draft and see which player they should covet.
KC @ Oak: The Chiefs are nothing if not inconsistently consistent. A five game losing streak has been followed by a five game win streak. During the W run QB Spaghetti Arm has the highest QBR rating. (103) Take that, all you rifle-armed bastards! Of course he’s only thrown 6 TD’s in that time but you can’t have everything, can you? There’s good news for Oakland-the Chiefs leading sack-meister has been ruled out and Berry, Halia and Bailey are all beaten up. The Raiders squeaked by the lousy Titans last week. This young (Woodson is excluded of course) team is still learning all about that whole “consistency” thing.
Car @ NO: As far as up-and-coming stars are concerned you could do worse than dialing in on CB Josh Norman battling with WR Cooks. As for the Panthers WR’s they can’t wait to be matched up on Saints CB Browner, PFF’s worst-ranked at his position. Under HC Payton the Saints have never been a 7 point dog at home. That speaks well of the job he has done and the perceived advantage that NO has at home.
Phi @ NE: RB Murray gets the start because Matthews is out. [peruses a number of Eagles-related sites] There’s not a lot to like about Philly right now. The D has collapsed and the O is stuck in neutral. It would seem as though HC Kelly has lost the team and is playing out the string. The Gronk is out so TE Chandler becomes a nice play at that spot. Despite being banged up everywhere I doubt the Pats will have much trouble dispatching the Eagles.
Philly just dickstomping all over the Pats and it’s not even available in my broadcast package. ARGH I’m too young to be betrayed by my package goddamnit
I would gladly trade my fantasy fuckery for this Pats Schadefreude
Brady scream and pout time on the sidelines … commence!
This Eagles 2nd half:
http://i1.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/717/893/a0c.gif
BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA DREAMBOATCEPTION TWO: YOU ARE GOING TO MAKE CHIP KELLY LOOK SMART BUGALOO!
please kill me
Funny.
It’s almost as if Tom Brady is only as good as the guys he’s throwing to.
I’m sure Gisele will have a rant about how he’s forced to throw to Eagles DBs because the Pats aren’t giving him any weapons
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA BRADY! DREAMY PICK
Delightful
MOAR DREAMBOATCEPTION!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view3/2322084/scary-movie-cum-blast-o.gif
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FS:LKDJFA:LKSFJ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jeebus, Carr. Did you let your brother play for you today?
These afternoon games are wild
CARRCEPTION!
Derek Carr regressing in a single quarter
oh jesus fuck carr
I’d hate to be the male nurse having to give the Gronk a sponge bath about now.
football is a fucking terrible sport
http://slightlychristopher.files.wordpress.com/2011/09/empathy-bear-feels-your-pain.jpg
SPEAD
Lol eagles defense, available in 53% of leagues
And started in 0.00000001%
Eagles’ defense is really spending too much time on the field today!
Chip Kelly has finally used his offensive genius brain to realise that his best chance of winning is to keep his shitty offence on the bench.
ALL THE PLACEKICKING HERP
Eagles up 2 TD on the Pats.
The Philadelphia Eagles are???? /Cleveland voice
Is this actually going to happen…
EXTRA POINTS FOR NOBODY
/sings the Eagles fight song with nobody else
Oh I am here with you my friend.
Holy shit. The Eagles’ special teams are shitting on the Patriots.
TINYDARRENDOWWWWWWWWWWWNNN!!!!!!!!!!
WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSss
TINY DARREN OH MY FUCKING GOD
TINYDOWN
FUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK
RAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
KILL EVERYTHING
KILL KILL KILL
haha
haha
“KILL KILL KILL”
Romo is that you?
woot!
BUNCHES OF FUNCHESS
If there is a more delicious food item than slow cooked pork I have yet to find it.
That was goddamn delicious.
Carnitas 4 lyfe!
As long as there’s no cilantro. I can’t stand that weed.
No cilantro. Just onion, garlic, orange and jalapeno along with the usual assortment of spices. Slow cook the pig in a beer and chicken stock bath and then finish to get crispy.
Fucking magical.
Anything low and slow with pork shoulder is meat magic.
Yes. YES! YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!
?w=400
CAMDOWN!
And that is why Dreamboat doesn’t scramble
So, after Schaub’s derp-6 resulted in a 14 pt Miami lead in just over 20 seconds, I decided to go play 9 holes rather than watch anymore.
I played like shit.
But I also didn’t have to watch the Ravens’ obligatory “get it within a field goal BUT NO DAMN CLOSER” routine.
Good day.
4 sacks on dreamboat so far.
That’s usually the equivalent of 32 flags.
Wow, Jake Delhomme and Jerry Richardson really seem to like one another…
It was a tinder date.
Yeah, pretty sure Jerry was gonna lean in for a kiss, just deciding how much tongue to use.
Cajun qb sighting!
Well shit, Maclin.
I LEAVE TO GO START DINNER AND THIS BULLSHIT HAPPENS?
FUCK THE EAGLES IN THEIR BATTERY-ACID-INFUSED TAINTS FOREVER
Oh Maestro, you just know the right things to say.
The less of the Iggles game I see on Redzone the happier I am. I sure as shit know Bradford isn’t marching them,
http://i.imgur.com/9hrRPs4.jpg
Cam back in game.
Horse Balls sighting DENIED
Horse Balls alert, cancelled.
I missed a Dreamboat ception? And it was a pick-six? Why did I have to be hungry NOOOWWWWWWWWWWW???
https://streamable.com/rbjq
I LOVE YOU!!
Suck it Brady!
A 100 YARD DREAMPICKSIX
It was pretty great…
http://www.allmystery.de/i/t01b12d_Randy_Marsh_covered_in_ectoplasm.jpg