I don’t watch my local news too much because it’s from a god-awful 75K-strong ‘city’ two hours away. I was watching today though and was reminded that one of the news broadcasters was a nationally (somewhat) significant sports guy just a few years ago. He’s been reporting stories about Aunt Granny’s bake sale that raised $234 for diabetic wolves for a while now. Why? Why is he where he is? Did he fall in love with a small city girl? Did he tire of the Bright Lights of Toronto? Or more likely (in my mind) what god-awful inner-demon manifested itself at his former job that caused him to run away to nowhere and ply his trade for a mere pittance of what he was pulling in before? I need to know…
Det @ NO: If the Lions lose they’ll jump from 7th in next year’s draft all the way to 5th. With a loss the Saints could go from 8th to 7th. This is where we are in Wk. 15 on a Monday Nighter in December in the NFL, people. Let’s pretend that both teams lose-it feels like the right thing to me. [looks at several 2016 mock drafts] Wow. There are a ton of dickbags with too much time on their hands!* I feel dizzy. Okay, as near as I can figure the Saints have to go D and there are 3 LB’s squished into the top 8 so…Myles Jack from UCLA? Okay, now the Lions. Hmmm…their secondary has been a complete mess for a few years now…how about CB Jalen Ramsey from Florida State? Now let’s tune into the game and see which team doesn’t want it more.
*I’m guilty of this charge
Drop’s better than a completion. Why throw there?
So.. who called the Hail Mary bomb?
72 yard Hail Mary coming up?
What. The. Fuck.
“Prater hasn’t missed a field goal this year.”
And that’s a jinx, everyone!
Yay!! It’s a Festivus miracle. On to the next playoff round
Come on, garbage points!
Saints kick the extra point again, successfully maximizing the amount of time they will trail by one score in this game. And if that’s not a moral victory, I don’t know what is.
“The rest of the tight ends in the NFL are jabroni I put in Camel Clutch.” -Iron Sheik
I’m sure Colston passed the strenuous concussion protocol before returning.
Colston got Chrebet’d.
Kammed
Classic Detroit. Manufacture solidly, then collapse into desperation, show signs of recovery, and then make everyone doubt if you’ll ever be worth a damn.
Just think of how popular the Lions would be if they had a defensive coordinator who’s last name was “Pooter”. Maybe Billy John Pooter.
Jim Bob Cooter and B.J. Pooter?
We just won the libertarian states.
DO YOU LIKE FISH STICKS
Welp, I’m out of fig newtons. Now what?
Did you come here to do anything else, other than eat fig newtons?
http://gifrific.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/leo-decaprio-shoulder-shrug.gif
Then you move onto heroin, of course.
The OTHER DFO way.
God bless Uncle Al.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=79t-VDjKe1c
GET
MOAR
FIG
NEWTONS
Do you like fish sticks?
Do you like movies about gladiators?
Have you ever been in a Turkish prison?
http://1.images.southparkstudios.com/blogs/southparkstudios.com/files/2014/08/1305_4_Kanye_Bat.gif
Did he have gills?
Woops…
Pick 6 time?
The time for shopping has passed and the time for eggnog and football is now.
Did Tirico call Ebron Eifert?
This fucking ad makes me want to smoke tobacco and I haven’t smoked tobacco in 15 years.
http://www.brandchannel.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/truth-orange-hookah.jpg
I’ve never understood why coaches don’t go for 2 on the first TD, when they’re down 15. If you don’t make it, you still have time to try and get 2 scores.
The explanation you always hear is “if you miss, you’ve made it harder for yourself to come back,” which is pure irrational hindsight-aided bullshit.
And the next step in the inevitable Lions collapse is complete.
Does the chart not say to go for two there?
Also, hello.
Have we made fun of Steven the FitCore trainer yet?
I am just bored and feel an Alison Brie would be enjoyable
http://cdn.rsvlts.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/Alison-Brie-GIF-06.gif
Ferrucio’s Riva Aquarama:
http://www.blogcdn.com/slideshows/images/slides/126/746/6/S1267466/slug/l/riva-lamborghini-speed-boat-21-1.jpg
What happening now could possibly matter less than this game?
Whatever Tebow’s doing.
Stupid Air Force.
http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/4f/ef/b8/4fefb89dad2c2dbf8a5397556f4a147a.jpg
Quakers gotta run…
THIS GAME, I CALL IT 1970’S CBS PRIME-TIME LINE-UP, ‘CAUSE IT FEATURES A JIM BOB AND A COOTER
I’m calling it a night. I need to get some rest so I don’t choke someone out tomorrow.
Were you and Fozz separated at birth?
There’s a Catholic high school in Baton Rouge? No fuckin way
I’m going to play the Jim Bob Cooter drinking game.
Whenever his name is mentioned in full everyone does a “Cooter shooter”.
Use you own interpretations.
Body shots are allowed.
I’m off to watch Band of Brothers. I’ll stop by on occasion.
Fuck off, Sobel!
“Point of Emphasis: An NFL Story”
Okay, now my cable box timed out and turned itself off. That’s two inanimate objects that want no part in this game.
*ahem* Three things.
Electronics never lie…
Cut Detroit some slack. They’ve sucked for so long, they may not know how to play with a huge lead.
That might not be an issue soon
All I wanted to do was to say to everyone, “Fuck you, you fucking idiots!”
Instead, all I did was say that to myself.
Fuck y’all!
It’s alright, pal.
http://i.imgur.com/Uxt9f.gif
Tahnks, bro!
Still time for a Detroit collapse?
Let the Lionsing commence!
In case you’re wondering, this will add so much amazing flavor to your “Asian” dish as to make it intolerable to those who suck:
http://content.internetvideoarchive.com/content/photos/9349/914924_013.jpg
holy fucking shit
http://media.shopwell.com/gladson/00755763000018_full.jpg
THOSE AREN’T PILLOWS!
So anyone want to talk about Star Wars?
AND HOW I SAW IT TODAY AND SHAT BRICKS ABOUT IT
Han shot first.
Haven’t seen the new one yet. Any good?
Pretty good. Maybe the third best of the franchise between V and IV.
I completely agree with this assessment.
I saw it this afternoon.
They got the feel completely right.
I’ll probably wait for the x-mas special
Good evening, Commentariat. This looks…awful
Seems liek theirs no game worth wahtching heir!
THIS GAME, I CALL IT THE “ROMAN EMPIRE” BECAUSE THAT’S THE LAST TIME LIONS KILLED THIS MANY SAINTS!
+10 Quo Vadis
My browser refused to let me type anything into the comment box. My computer is official tired of this game.
“My San Diego Chargers” really should be said by the current mayor of Los Angeles.
This game is officially awful. Going back to re-reading the Expanse series; starting book two now.
Gruden still Grudening tho
Alligator sausage cheesecake? Who the fuck let Guy Fieri invade the goddamn French Quarter???
It’s awful. Last time he went to Tijuana, he invented Donkey Sauce.
That shitty Navy Federal ad makes me as nauseous as a sailor on a ballistic sub.
Once again: This Burger King debate commercial is perfect. A politician proposes something no one wants that will be impossible to pass.
BUT I WANT $1.49 NUGGETSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
The King’s debate opponent in that commercial looks like parody Goodell.