Reporter: “The stakes are pretty high here, aren’t they?”
Coach Reid: [rolls eyes] “Of course they are-three quarters of an inch at the very least!. [enters trance, talks in monotone] And the twice-baked potato must have bacon in it. The salad must have bacon. The roasted asparagus must have bacon. [emerges from reverie] Mmmmm. Uh, next question?”
Oh, there’s a game with Reid coaching and you thought you might get through the intro without a food reference? Really? Okay, Gronk is questionable. Pats fans shout in unison, THE ONLY THING QUESTIONABLE IS YOUR DESIRE! ALL HAIL SAT-, WE MEAN BELICHICK. APOLOGIES, WE MAKE THAT MISTAKE MORE OFTEN THAN WE’D LIKE TO ADMIT. I’m sure that Gronk’s new “personal assistant” is going to whip him up some sort of special milkshake with extra warthog ovaries that will enable him to play. How important is it for Brady that his fave TE plays? His QBR rating drops from 80 down to 31 without him. The Chiefs front can and must get pressure on the Pats QB-Brady’s O-line has given up 38(!) sacks this year. Speaking of questionable, WR Maclin and his high ankle sprain made the trip but he’s iffy-there’s only so much warthog parts to go around. He and TE Kelce combined for 49% of all pass targets this year. Yet Another Injury Note: WR Antonio Brown has been ruled out of this game as well as tomorrow’s tilt against Denver. KC’s O looks to be on QB Smith’s shoulders but he seems to up to the task. Since the winning streak started he’s passing downfield a bit more, has rushed for more first downs than RB West and six out of ten times his QB rating has been above 100. Perhaps this weird Chiefs mojo will continue-wouldn’t that be great?
Just when you think it simply isn’t possible to hate the Patriots any more than you do, you hear them blow the foghorn after in incomplete pass.
Die.
You.
Fuckers.
Die.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qiMaOmDtaYI
Alex Smith can throw a ball more than eight yards?!
Is this a good time to ask who backs up Alex Smith?
Chase Daniel!
Andy Reid’s halftime adjustment? The QB sneak from his own 25.
Pats may as well put Garopolo in.
Designed QB run to start the second half=playing to fucking WIN
♫ Belichick is Satan’s spawn ♫
Dan, what has to change for the Chiefs to defeat the Patriots today?
The score mostly.
Hopefully the laxative they put in Tom Brady’s Gatorade will kick in.
Harsh reality.
That’s a sharp weiner
Don’t worry, guys. The Broncos beat the Patriots with Brock Osweiler. There’s no reason they can’t beat them with
oh
oh. fuck.
Hah. Mike Mularkey.
Up yours, Sooners.
ha ha
Damn you and your upcoming #1 ranking, and your makeout parties.
Not me, just not the cousinfuckers.
I was still talking to the Sooners in general, in spite of my apparent reply motivated reply.
Mostly, I’m pissed that my jinx ability is still intact.
/Go Pats!!!!
Oh you….
Bruce Arians is the pimpinest pimp in NFL coach history.
arians looks like a racist pimp
Oklahoma vs. West Virginia.
Basket balling game or worst state to live in contest?
Toxic dust contest in 3…2…1
Alabama would like a word.
Arkansas and Mississippi demand recounts
Can we close the book on Alex Smith’s career? How many more years of interminable play-it-safe “just good enough to lose” can people take
Dave Krieg played 19 seasons.
68-up, 20 seconds to go, OU ball
http://i.imgur.com/sJQbq90.gif
Marcus Allen helped OJ. Or was it Ray J?
Hospital/doctor shows are BY FAR the stupidest shows on TV.
There’s no way at this point that they are anything but recycled plots anyway.
I’m gonna make the bold statement that Tea Leoni is not unattractive.
We’re old.
She was at her peaky peak in Bad Boys.
That is real gotdammed HOT TAEK.
Watch You Kill Me with her and Ben “mother fucking” Kingsley.
So, I spent the las 40 mins on the phone with my Aunt. Are the the. Pats still up 7-3?
no
Just heard. Gotttttttdammmmmmned.
Everclearing my bongs.
Expecting resin hitting to commence T — 1 hour.
I down shifted from rum to beer.
68-66 OU with 1:20 to play
BOOMER
WOO Cousinfuckers!!!
♫ Bernard Pollard: Save us now! ♫
Actually it’s a two possession game since they’re incapable of scoring a touchdown.
(I’m banking on a safety)
Chefs now only three field goals away from taking the lead!
I question Andy Reid’s “Trading a TD for a FG” strategy.
You’ll look awfully silly when the touchdown bubble bursts.
http://youtu.be/JGstHASo1t4
The Big Short (Kick)
3 more FGs to a win!!
That was only uncatchable by about 10 yards, Alex.
New England can put in their backups now
“Don’t force the ball and risk an interception here” will be on Alex Smlith’s tombstone.
It sure as hell won’t be on Rothlisberger’s.
something something forced the ball
Fucking P*tr**ts.
Why you hatin’ on the vowels?
♫ This is why I drink so much ♫
Used to be why I drank too…
This team has won 11 straight games? Are we sure about that? Are we sure that we weren’t just part of a hive mind hallucination?
They got to play Laundry Jones in his first pro start at Arrowhead.
That’s how they beat the Stillers.
It was the worst of PeyPey’s foot owie. That’s Denver’s excuse. Serious, he threw like 5 INTs and the defense held ’em to FGs almost every time.
speaking of hive mind how great would a Borg invasion be right about now
The most Chefs drive ever and the most Andy Reid drive ever. All we need is the QB to vomit.
http://mashable.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/Glee1.gif
Jesus Christ Chiefs, don’t fucking help them beat you.
Andy Reid: Too late
Andy Reid: I miss cheesesteaks
http://49.media.tumblr.com/fb5ffbf3e7f55e169efcfd92b0adc29c/tumblr_mlkiziKkhP1qialgyo1_400.gif
Textbook execution, KC.
Amazing
Lovie Smith vs. Andy Reid, clock management. WHO YA GOT??
SWEET DEATH
goddamn you tiny hands
A touchdown here is critical to my cover bet.
At least the Chiefs have two more timeouts to use to ensure they can score this half.
HAHAHAHAHA OF COURSE THEY DON’T FUCK ANDY REID
http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view3/2301373/red-fang-prehistoric-dog-o.gif
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y51M4totvXQ
I legit had no idea that Jason Avant was still playing football.
Good thing KC hasn’t wasted any timeouts this half…
Andy’s not worried, they are already in FG range.
I don’t know. Field goals are risky. Best to just punt from this far out.
Jamie Collins is the best porn name ever
Guy or girl, for that matter.
Pretty sure Jason Avant is ineligible to receive a pass since he’s not still in the league.