Your “Run, Olivia Munn-It’s A Trap!” NFC Division Semi-Final Open Thread

Why is it that QB Palmer can’t have nice things? He was imprisoned in Cincy then renaissance-ed in Arizony then season-injured. Now he’s having a career year and I can’t help but feel it will all come tumbling down. Was his dad a preacher in the Church of God With Signs Following? Is that why he’s snake-bitten? One thing though, the Pack better not blitz him much. Against pressure he has an 84 QBR, a 9.4 yds. per throw average and a 65% completion rate. What he also has over his entire career is not a one playoff victory. Zona LB Okafor is done for the season with some sort of toe injury that no one wants to talk about. No doubt it was fireworks. I’ve got a sixth sense about these things. RB Johnson was held in check the last time these teams met (wk. 16) but as my wife says, “you can’t hold a man-beast down for long”. I think she was yakking about one of her countless exes but what do I know? Stupid, ineffectual QB Rodgers has recently been replaced by superstar Rodgers-which one will show up today? Remember the 51-45 score-fest that happened a way back in ’09? I’d love to see that sort of game again. That particular game you had to race to the bathroom during ads to ensure that you didn’t miss a score. START TYPING YOU SCAMPS!

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WCS

Are they insinuating Larry Fitzgerald is a Terminator?

Brick Meathook
Brocky

Andy Reid has called a time put!

Brocky

Holy fuck mu auto correct

Brocky

SINCE WHEN IS FUCKING MU A WORD ANDROID!

jjfozz

Can we send out a memo to pro football players that “the U” is as played out as Bronson Pinchot in Beverley Hills Cop?

theeWeeBabySeamus

That’s….. daU

Kungjitsu

I’ll take THE U over THE Ohio State University all day.

makeitsnowondem

haha, clinton dicks

Spur

More like yum-yum cumming dicks – Aaron Rodgers

Brocky

Oh the game where packers fans are still complaining about a facemask?

jjfozz

I am rooting for the cardinals through the entire playoffs because bruce arian rocks the fuck out of that cabby hat, unlike the fuck ass hipster assbags in my community.

King Hippo

The Cards/Panthers winner is totes fine by me. I’d be content even if Denver lost to them.

...

WHAT IF I TOLD YOU IT WAS A SHITTY CHEVY?! LOL

Spur

Thats a 80K car!!! No… just no…. clearly a Ford/Chevy

King Hippo

22 THOUSAND dollars? FUCK YOU!!!

Brick Meathook
ThePirateSloth

PRESSURE ALL THE GAPS

/giggles uncontrollably

Spur

Rodgers saw 9 men on the line and got wet.

Brocky

Green Bay introduces their whitems fullback and a white #3 receiver rather than their starting black tight end

King Hippo

Our Lord wants a Cards win too! PRAISE BE!!

makeitsnowondem

Blete Clakeman!

Sill Bimmons

Cake Bleatman!

Spur

Why are looking at Carson Palmer’s ass??

King Hippo

Ted Larsen, NC Muthafuckin State!!

Also, GM Steve Keim, OL, NC State.

theeWeeBabySeamus

NC Muthafuckin State
That IS the official name….sez so on my muthafuckin diplomas.

theeWeeBabySeamus
Sill Bimmons

HEY FITTY YOU DIDN’T GRADUATE FROM THE UNIVERSITY OF PITTSBURGH YOU FOR-PROFIT STOOGE

ThePirateSloth

Do you think there’s an alternate Earth where a well read, hysterical, intelligent, dick joke themed, football blog is dedicated to Michelle Tafoya?

Sill Bimmons

no

WCS

There was, until it was bought by Buttfukks dot com.

Kungjitsu

Bring back Xmas Ape

King Hippo

why is Arians wearing a non-hipster hat?

Sill Bimmons

He lost his Kangol?

Spur

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blackroseMD1

CBS streams the game free online, NBC tries to sell me a cable package.

Welp, guess it’s off to the dark corners of the internet.

ThePirateSloth

Wait. I thought NBC was good with streaming

blackroseMD1

They are, if you have a cable package that includes NBC. I don’t have a cable package, just high speed internet, so I can’t stream the game from the official site.

Spur

Go Cardinals! Suck a fat one Rodgers!

Sill Bimmons

PSYCHO KIA QU’EST QUE-CE?

FA FA FA FA FA FA FA FA FA FA

ThePirateSloth

Just got to my dive bar, on my first beer. Guy next to me asks during Pats highlights “So I didn’t watch that game, how did that game go?”

My response “any coach other than Andy Reid would have beaten the Pats”

His response: “What about Chip Kelly?”

Fuck you Oregon. Fuck you.

Sill Bimmons

damn

Brick Meathook

Hey, did any of you find set of keys back in the early game thread? I’m completely locked out of my wine vault and the Bentley is running and that thing drinks premium at about a gallon a minute even when idling. Never buy a sixteen-cylinder car, they are just not worth it.

Sill Bimmons

Bentley hasn’t made a sixteen-cylinder engine since the 30s.

LIAR LIAR LIAR LIAR

Brick Meathook

KID I VOTED FOR ALF LANDON

Sill Bimmons

Cards are going to lose and lose huge.

...

YOU SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH

packman_jon

No

packman_jon

LMAOOOOOOOOOO

Sill Bimmons

Bruce Arians.

Rich man’s Andy Reid.

Spur

No Carrie?

WCS

I made about eight pounds of beef stew, if anyone wants some.

packman_jon

PAAAAAAAAAAACKERS

Kungjitsu

Any signs of Kimo von Oelhoffen?

laserguru

What’s happening folks?

Did I miss anything?

I figured we should hear The National Anthem before the start of the evening game.

Moonbatting Average

PFTCommenter: “The fourth quater is the only time Andy Reid ever says “no thanks” to having seconds”

Doktor Zymm

King Hippo

HAI Dok.

We <3 Poland. 😀

theeWeeBabySeamus

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Sill Bimmons

hey guys

WCS

comment image
Yo.

laserguru

Sup Sill.

Col. Duke LaCross

Word.

ThePirateSloth

HEY YOU GUUUUUUYS

Sill Bimmons

That was about as bad as it can get.

packman_jon

Sup. Got any beer? I’m #GettingCrunk tonight

WCS

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Men (and Dok if she’s back from anger-napping) I spent the whole week traveling for work and the last few hours with you and pigskin. Going to put the screen down for a little so I don’t get dumped. May Carson Palmer guide his team to victory, may Coach dipshit again reveal his true form, and may you all get good and drunk.

laserguru

That’s a very nice prayer.
Best to you and yours

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hey motherfuckers, we might get snow flurries tomorrow morning….which means if you need milk or bread tonight you’re shit out of luck.
/the south is so stoopid

WCS
Sill Bimmons

STRAWNG

makeitsnowondem

carson palmer fanboi mode engage

entropy

So. Irrationally. Angry.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Go not-Packers!

...

If the Packers also win tonight I will literally die.

Fronkenshteen

Boy, the line is holding steady at 7. I wonder if some whale is gonna load up on the Cardinals and push it to 8 or 8.5?

King Hippo

I was shocked it didn’t get at least to 7.5, even if GB is a “public team.”

packman_jon

Pretty sure Andy Reid can’t bet on sports

Fronkenshteen

/dying

King Hippo

“That’s an awful lot of FGs” – A. Reid

packman_jon

HOW THE FUCK YOU DOING BOYS! Getting ready for the game in the only way possible
https://www.instagram.com/p/BAnpuvVRMW2/

Brocky

I’m doing relatively shirt with little optimism

Brocky

Relatively shitty that is. My shirt ain’t doing too good either

MikeWallaceAndGromit

I might have to watch the Packers get murdered completely sober, as I’m a bit hungover at the moment.

packman_jon

A real Packers fan would know how to stay drunk through the whole day,, Imo

entropy

“A real Packers NFL fan would know how to stay drunk through the whole day,, Imo.”

Fixed that for you.

packman_jon

You’re right but still go fuck yourself
/sadly my phone can autocompletell the whole thing

entropy

Hahaha. Love it.

theeWeeBabySeamus

As a former resident, I proclaim that the best thing about the Valley of the Sun is the ass…
http://cdn7.viralscape.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/Arizona-Cardinals-Cheerleaders.jpg

entropy

When I used to travel to Tucson for business, I would always make it a point to drive through the U of A around 3 PM, because dear god that school (and Arizona State up in the Valley of the Sun) draws some of the most incredible looking women in the world. Just great eye candy as far as the eye could see.

...

No lie. When I visited there with some friends we pretty much did just that.

theeWeeBabySeamus

When I lived out there I did a lot of biking.
Thru ASU campus was always on my route.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I also used to flip Herb Sendek the bird….but that’s entirely different matter.

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