Fuck, it’s early on the West Coast and yet we already have our first Gold medal and it’s
Virginia Thrasher from the USA in Air Rifle. You know, if you can’t make a good school shooting joke out of that, I don’t think I know you.
Lots of events on today with medals being handed out in Archery
Road Cycling, Fencing, Judo, Shooting (more American medals, y’all!), Swimming, and Weightlifting.
I propose a DFO Drinking Game/Posting Challenge: Every Gold medal winner gets a shot of the most common liquor from that country and a picture of a model from that country (could be male or female, no discrimination here) posted on this thread.
What say you?
BALLS’ TIP O’ THE DAY: The best way to watch the Olympics is to be in a country other than the US. If, for some reason, that is not possible, get a VPN and pretend you’re Canadian. They really have the best coverage and there is no nationalistic bent to the coverage. THANKS CANADIA!
Have at it!
Handy Helpful Household Hints!
After finishing your caipirahna feel free to dump your ice and your lime slivers down the garbage disposal.
Next time you run the garbage disposal it will grind the lime rinds and their oils and leave the disposal with a clean citrusy scent!
I like watching beach volleyball, but this is probably the only place someone named “Misty” could succeed without stripping,
YOU DON’T TALK ABOUT THE CERULEAN CITY GYM LEADER THAT WAY!!!
http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/p__/images/7/75/Misty_frustrated_with_Psyduck's_pathetic_attacks.png/revision/latest?cb=20151016020045&path-prefix=protagonist
Let’s try this:
http://cdn.bulbagarden.net/upload/thumb/6/66/Misty_and_Psyduck.png/200px-Misty_and_Psyduck.png
Yo
S’up?
Walked through one of Portland’s fabled northern industrial zones. So chances are I breathed in a shitload of lead and God knows what else. And I happened to pass by the Portland Brewing Co. and they’re totally out of that Lemon Blonde Ale. However, I walked 6.6 miles and climbed the equivalent of 10 floors/20 flights of stairs, so I’ve got that going for me.
Which is nice
WHY AM I GETTING POLITICAL ADS I LIVE IN NEW JERSEY
Christie feels they have a fighting chance*
*Christie desperately needs a job next year
He can eat my ass. I’ll pay him two bits.
It’s a better deal than whatever Trump offers.
If I didn’t have a dvr I’d have busted my tv by now. Florida is a bitch during elections.
I’m getting them in Northern CA too. Since when has this place been in play nationally??
Guys, I don’t think I can watch the hall of fame game.
Fucking colts and packers? My two least favorite teams? Self righteous dbags, all seemingly living in the greater chicago area.
Ive gone years without having to deal with favre, and I don’t want to.
And fuck dungy. Goblin looking son of a bitch.
I love football, but God damn, I couldn’t enjoy this match up less if tom brady was reffing.
You can have fun, even if METEOR. Don’t watch the pregame. Don’t watch the post game. Just watch the action bits, and DFO as needed.
Next year’s HoF will be so much better. Dawkins, LT, and Jason Taylor.
But they’re wearing officially licensed NFL uniforms!
Don’t get me started on the goddamn Packers.
In which sports is it okay to pat a compatriot on the butt?
Wait…which one isn’t it okay?
Water polo,
Yeah it’s difficult, but damn that’s never stopped me before.
All, right? Consent is on the sign up forms.
Now we’re talking.
I’m starting to really appreciate that the different time zones are watching completely different Olympic events.
^ THIS – I am still on men’s gymnastics
The online streams are live (I think?), so it’s really fucking me up with everyone else
Jim Jefferies on fucking Michael Phelps’ ex-girlfriend:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LmEFPnaFsHI
Jim Jeffries on gun control is well worth an internet search.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0rR9IaXH1M0
Also vaccination.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LmEFPnaFsHI
This women’s weightlifting duel between this gal from Japan and this gal from Thailand is fucking terrifying.
http://ichef.bbci.co.uk/onesport/cps/800/cpsprodpb/D480/production/_90700445_tanasan2_reuters.jpg
Not even the scariest woman’s weightlifter I’ve ever seen:
Isn’t that Nick Mangold’s sister?
Bill Clinton was still in office when Kerri Walsh first competed in the olympics.
This woman Thai weight lifter needs a fucking agent NOW.
I can see a long, financially stable career shilling products in her homeland…
You’re a man, I’m a woman. We’re just too different. One day, I’ll be as awesome as Leela and that line will work.
Shit, it works already.
It’ll work better if you leave the last sentence in.
How is your WC Fields imitation?
Good times.
The lighting on Jones reminds me of my brother’s professor who called himself Blacker Than Midnight
Jones?
Whoever 95 is. GIS said it was Jarvis Jones, but I wasn’t checking for accuracy.
Yeah. I fucked up that somehow. I meant Greg Lloyd.
If you have three gold medals and five shoulder surgeries it may be time to stop.
http://66.media.tumblr.com/8c7bf27f77872b9e853b56ef94b087d9/tumblr_obhystHyC51sqf5tdo2_400.gif
Seems to be okay. Must be one of those new fangled PeyPey shoulder tapes.
Highly gifable match already.
Watching men’s gymnastics just reminds me how terrible my shoulder strength is. I don’t need that kind of blow to my self-esteem.
Inspirational!
?
Just got back from a 3.5 hour Nats game. It was fun, but the archery bronze medal round was more exciting.
Men’s Gymnastics
He’ll never be a carpenter.
Men’s Gymnastics
Men’s Gymnastics
Gents, if you haven’t yet discovered this woman, I am here to help.
http://cdn-s3.si.com/styles/inline_gallery_desktop/s3/images/Screen%20Shot%202016-06-15%20at%201.47.26%20PM.png?itok=zLXRiRGE
Sierra Skye on Instagram get on it.
She seems nice.
http://eric.freakwebdesign.co.uk/livingstonjames/wp-content/uploads/sites/16/2015/11/Mind-The-Gap.jpg
Americans coming out to Iron Maiden. \m/
http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s–ZECjaoga–/c_scale,fl_progressive,q_80,w_800/18s8bar9sunmbgif.gif
Ichiro almost got his 3000th hit on an ugly infield hit.
I wish he had played in MLB before he was 27. I’d enjoy seeing Pete Rose scramble to remain relevant after Ichiro broke his bullshit record.
Yeah, I’m watching baseball too.
I am not ashamed.
I expected a late night Cubs game since they’re in Oakland, but they played this afternoon. Now I just can’t sleep and I refuse to watch NBC’s Frankenstein’s monster of reconstituted sports-like product.
Brother Taj was the same way.
Should be a 7:05 California time start dammit!
Time for your enema, young man. http://67.media.tumblr.com/a5a26d5e171cb83bf5aa81ab97de646f/tumblr_oa7fbleXcf1qeozpoo1_1280.jpg
Sure. It’ll be the only butt stuff I can expect anytime soon.
In the concussion era, how do they justify pulling the headgear from boxing?
Cause the head gear didn’t actually do anything.
Carlos Balderes with the upset for US in boxing!!!
As previously stated, that’s what happens when you let the youngin’ punch you in the face repeatedly in the first.
Nope. Nope. Show me sports or show me death! I’m gonna go watch Futurama.
Never a bad choice.
I’ve never understood Tom Brokaw having a job…
Since when was a news presenter desired who sounded like he was a drunk having a stroke?
Buy he has a good story right? He rode his family wagon to South Dakota or some shit? Then he delivered papers and ended up narrating WWII live before they even had live TV
I’m bored. Fuck this Olympic not events shit.
“………”
-…….
Tony Sparano’s Football being unusually elliptical tonight.
Being 32, Kerri Walsh’s ass has been a regular part of my olympic viewing history.
“Gerald Ford, lost in the Amazon and presumed eaten by piranha, dead today at the age of 83.”
http://www.nbc.com/sites/nbcunbc/files/files/images/2015/3/19/140228_2749537_Tom_Brokaw_Pre_Tapes_anvver_3.jpg
This photo gets me every time.
http://66.media.tumblr.com/2cb87fa86f1ca8ac716a4513073b8f44/tumblr_o1dm5ih3Ts1u0k6deo1_500.gif
http://66.media.tumblr.com/829dd4dfcf6df70bb0e00b722e1bcbc9/tumblr_o589l6LQbS1tho4fro1_1280.jpg
Good for her, keeping watch.
Aw, the big boobie lady and her skinny hot blonde friend lost the volleyingball.
http://12399-presscdn-0-86.pagely.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/ADV_IF_Xiamen_Open-750×300.jpg
I know there are different standards for athletes, but a B cup is not a big boobie. They are both hot ladies though.
Doktor, I served with B-cups. I knew B-cups. B-cups were friends of mine. Doktor, those are no B-cups.
I’ve worn many a style of sports bra, and either those are B cups, or I’ve been wearing the wrong shit for years. I’m only going based on this particular picture, so it’s possible that’s a highly compressive bra and she’s a C, but there ain’t no bra out there that squishes em that much.
Less compressive, more impressive?
That’s a better picture. I should send her an email and ask what she wears. I have a couple bras that make stuff flat enough against the body that they minimize size, but it’s still difficult to find something for burpees or similar, where there are multiple angles. I have about a dozen sports bras, some look awesome, but suck, some do manage, and pull things flat. Seriously curious about what she’s wearing.
You have just earned my vote
“BRA FIGHT!”
*Not dyslexic
Isabelle Forrer is fun to watch run
I was actually just remarking that she was unusually well-endowed for a world-class athlete.
Pretty sure the dog didn’t understand what I was talking about, or he may just be sick of my shit.
This may not be Olympic Boxing, but it’s entertaining as fuck. The Kazikhstan dude should probably stop getting hit in the face
http://66.media.tumblr.com/8cffaf7db84df218811be27acaa24b80/tumblr_o50xc9Obkt1u5go9do1_500.jpg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hcuo4VeNCkQ
http://66.media.tumblr.com/d476c86285df9db62ca78189edc91875/tumblr_o5a1hcdmxP1r9qhhio1_1280.jpg
Oh boy. They fucked up olympic boxing.
I have exactly enough mint for one more julep. I wish there was a tennis game where you had to pass like in volleyball. I would totally play that.
Caipiranhas are officially engaged!
Let’s shake that ass Brazilian style!
Damn these things are tasty!
Hooray!
Lily Zhang, the US table tennis player has an interesting looking coach…
http://www.indiacc.org/sites/default/files/u39/Massimo.jpg
http://www.heaven4sure.com/Portals/0/photos/woody%20allen%20younger.jpg
I’m just saying….
He triggered all my Woody Allen jokes a few minutes ago
I bought some of the anti-Trump beer tonight. I’m saving it for Election Night.
CHINGO TU PELO, FIVE RABBITS!
Unless there’s another anti-Trump beer.
You are also far above the minimum IQ so you are anti-Trump too.
The beer can remedy that problem.
JESUS! HOW MUCH ARE YOU GOING TO DRINK?!?!
http://67.media.tumblr.com/a91c0c42b7e40d73af1a0144e34988a7/tumblr_nrnmqldYgp1qe4ru4o1_540.gif
Showing the medals ceremony for shooting. A prime example of how bad NBC is at broadcasting, during the entire shooting event, at no time did they ever show the full firing range. You just saw the participants standing there, with the target superimposed next to them.
Its akin to only showing one end of the fucking pool. You get the impression from the broadcast that the participants are hitting these massive targets, the size of their heads, pretty close to them.
All you need is a fucking wide screen shot every once in a while. Hell, show it when the participants are changing position to give the audience a realistic frame of reference. GODDAMN IT THIS PISSES ME OFF! Its like watching an Ed Wood film.
University of West Virginia doesn’t exist, Bob.
http://67.media.tumblr.com/0afb1c3ec9dd771dd7385122c2b82d70/tumblr_o46me0WrzU1tsg1zwo1_500.gif
Don’t tell that poor girl; she has no idea she’s been enrolled at Trump University all these years.
All good…couches still burn fine no matter what fancy finishing school ya go to…
http://mediad.publicbroadcasting.net/p/wvpn/files/styles/x_large/public/201504/AP_Morgantown_Fire.jpg
FINALLY you’re joining the rest of us in reality!
Good. Good.
This is the first step on the road to getting better.
http://66.media.tumblr.com/8a7cf77bd9acdeae5bd349f0543a67a7/tumblr_msq8bvVgDO1qjmd86o1_500.jpg
http://67.media.tumblr.com/4401865326a6715dbef64a0991447e8d/tumblr_mzsialmgx31s3rmk1o1_500.gif
This is good news for me:
https://youtu.be/LBbx41UaHVI