Kudos to those of you that viewed *all* the football yesterday. That is an amazing commitment on your part. Between the booze and the better half staring at me with her hands on her hips I was not able to get it done. I don’t use the word ‘hero’ very often but you folks are the true heroes of this site. You’re the glue that keeps the macaroni on the construction paper of the open threads. TO THE GAME!
NYG/MINNY-[looks at Giants injury report] WHY GOD, WHY? Hey, remember last year when the Giants secondary was struck by a rash-ton of injuries? Well, looky here-tonight cb Rogers-Cromartie is limited, Apple is done and safeties Thompson and Berhe are out. That means that qb Bradford, he of the 67.8 completion % and passer rating of 107.8 might just have himself a walk in the park. He’s very accurate on short/medium routes so look for wr Diggs and te Rudolph to shine. BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE! The Vikes have 15 sacks in three games and are going up against an average O-Line. This is the very situation where the Giants need Eli to pull the old 420 yards passing gem out of his ass. It’s not out of the realm of rational thinking given his wr trio of OBJ, Cruz and Shepherd.
Now…START YOUR KEYBOARDS, GENTLEMAN!
McClellin is on NE now. Maybe he can hit Tawmmy during practice.
http://assets1.sportsnet.ca/wp-content/uploads/2015/11/rodgers_collarbone.gif
If Hillary Clinton could get under Donald Trump’s skin as easily as cornerbacks get under Odell Beckham Jr’s skin she would already be president.
Wait for debate #2, when she just tells Trump to stop whining like a little bitch and grow some balls. That should do it.
What’s more likely: OBJ gets ejected on 2nd personal, or he gets a TD?
I’m guessing both.
Second taunting ON a TD?
Yes
McAdoo almost showed some balls. Almost.
Good thing he double checked his zipper before taking the field.
What a bunch of pussies, go for it.
This reminds me–I gotta take a leak.
“What do you do for a living?”
“I exist and people take photographs of me.”
“Do they have some sort of training program? Because that sounds like pretty good work if you can get it.”
Odell’s a bitch.
Beckham is pretty good at this football thing but awful at this anger management thing.
SO NICE YOU SAID IT TWICE
I didn’t mean to.
http://www.strangevehicles.com/images/content/6704.jpg
Beckham is pretty good at this football thing but awful at this anger management thing.
Was Odell applauding his own penalty?
Im down 44 with Minnesota D and Diggs. I’m fucked aren’t I?
Coming into tonight I needed 9 points from Eli in a league that gives 6 for passing TDs.
/Reaches for bleach
I was halfway through that ad featuring a vast and threatening and absurd conspiracy before I realized it was a commercial for a new Dan Brown movie and not a Trump campaign ad.
So before or after the bye, when Bradford finally hurts himself this season?
Why not both?
I’m going with the after. Raise hopes just to crush them.
I’m gonna go out on a limb and say during.
Doing push-ups during the bye week.
http://iruntheinternet.com/lulzdump/images/gifs/One-Arm-Pushup-girl-face-plant-floor-13703862372.gif
Why couldn’t the Cowboys play this shitty version of the Giants on week 1?
Don’t worry, they will in week 14
http://img.pandawhale.com/94593-Anne-Hathaway-spanking-gif-Img-bsJt.gif
Woooo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TJtiepwpKFw
https://youtu.be/IzbSRCkGEv4?t=33s
I wish i was watching Luke Cage or Westworld right now, but i’m not….
*stares at bleach again*
*Norv Turner pops up on screen*
Somewhere, someplace, Lazerface has gone Super Sayian.
Fun fact: “Laserface” was the advice given to teenage Norv by his dermatologist.
Wow. If this one had a snaggletooth, she’d be the twin of my wife’s girlfriend when we lived in Florida.
http://i1152.photobucket.com/albums/p486/FuzzySapiens/Message%20Board%20%20Women/ae2adb7d07ba4e18773dc824f3e682e7.gif
Teeth? Didn’t notice.
Wife’s girlfriend? Didn’t notice.
So, you like… chalk?
http://i1152.photobucket.com/albums/p486/FuzzySapiens/Message%20Board%20%20Women/IyTx2o_zps94196eca.gif
“I keep telling you, YES.”
Dick Vitale, filling out his NCAA bracket
I see it’s another week of “Defense has showed up to play double time because the Offense is drunk” for the Giants.
http://i1152.photobucket.com/albums/p486/FuzzySapiens/Message%20Board%20%20Women/anigif_enhanced-buzz-10066-1355510533-11.gif
OH HAI!
http://www.reactiongifs.com/r/2012/05/hello.gif
Holy fuck, that was perfect. Laughed my ass off.
Goodness I’ve seen more tits here than oncologists at Kettering-Sloan.
This one’s better. More Eva, less weird guy shooting pool.
Dad:So you spend $10 a month for the wwe network and all you really watch is the ppvs?
Me: Yeah, and the show NXT they run every week
Dad:and its worth that?
Me thinking:</
Me:</ Yeah
http://www.hrwiki.org/w/images/b/bc/Cartographer.png
4
Aren’t they all the same woman?
Yes. I still prefer 4. Maybe. Or 3.
I can’t tell if they’re the same person or 4 different ones. Or of number two goes by the initials Lexi B. No wait, that’s too specific, L. Belle.
Oh Commander Shepard, no.
http://i.imgur.com/wKiEFVK.gif
http://i1096.photobucket.com/albums/g321/CRE48/MOVING%20Pictures/vica-kerekes-muzi-v-nadeji-_zpsa355956a.gif
Odell Beckham looks like a black Eraserhead.
“Banged his way out”
Story of my life.
Giants O needs to speed shit up.
THIS SAM BRADFORD, I CALL HIM COLONEL JAMES FORSYTH, BECAUSE HE REPLACED THE GUY WHO STARTED THE MASSACRE OF THE WOUNDED KNEE
http://24.media.tumblr.com/dc2c30f9be5fd678baaf50f587c35bea/tumblr_mt8qpclw7b1rsvccoo1_400.gif
Nice stadium, but my god that carpet was ugly.
Fire Gruden and replace him with Marshawn Lynch.
Correction: Fire Gruden, INTO THE SUN, and replace him with Marshawn Lynch.
We had a deal five-head! You get a second Super Bowl Ring and in exchange, you go away. That means no more fucking Nationwide jingles.
He will
never ever
die
Eh, that’s what they said about Al Davis.
Al isn’t dead, he’s gestating.
(Nothing But) Flowers Penalties
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c3t5nmgRVMs
Someone just had a GREAT MOMENT IN POOP HISTORY in the fucking lavatory right behind me.
I’ve never shit my pants, I’ve never taken a shit on a plane or train, and I can honestly count on both hands the number of times I’ve had to take a shit in public.
What the fuck is wrong with you people?
I shit in public constantly.
In the middle of the park is the bestest, while folks try to play ultimate frisbee.
Constantly? Have you thought about seeing a doctor?
I too have no qualms about the idea of shitting in a public toilet although some of them are pretty fucking gross.
You’ve shit in public?
Good grief, man. USE A TOILET!
Now he tells me…
Did you get PK’s autograph, or not?
I haven’t seen him, but if I do I assure you I will give him the full DFO love treatment.
Bro, when the Citrucel wants to talk, ain’t no shutting it up.
I hope someone tells Eli, that people can’t catch with their feet.
First Church of BLEERGH-New York Chapter is conducting a successful mission trip to Minnesota.
Does everyone get those shitty Toyota ads, or am I in an alternate univrse where Corolla owners think they’re cool?
The lesson is that roller derby is back and primed for violent ogling.
Thank Jeebus, I thought it was a NoVa/DC thing…
“Adam’s half Hispanic, so not only is his last name Carolla, he was conceived in one”
We get Eli Toyota ads! They’re as ridiculous as they sound.
When you search “bewbs gif”, this is the top result. I approve.
http://static.fjcdn.com/gifs/Bewbs_1c0c0e_2575955.gif
This is result #2. Again, totes approved.
http://i287.photobucket.com/albums/ll147/Jn_barnes/bewbs.gif
I’m guessing #3 involves Wolfman Rob at the beach, just shakin’ them babies out!
Sadly, this is #3.
http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y238/Bjorkaniac/bewbs-2.gif
Is she someone… ‘famous’? I’ve seen the gif many times, but I have never been able to find any other, ahem, material starring her.
The second one is Shay Laren, and she does produce other “material.”
That was interference, but i’ll take it!
Ha, the corner rejected Shaun Hill’s congratulatory fist bump. Bradford has rendered him more useless than tits on a board (until his inevitable injury).
Posterboard tits would feel a bit weird.
Isn’t that “tits on a boar?”
Also yes?
I guess NY isn’t playing defense?
They have an exhibit at Seattle’s EMP Museum (which was really fucking cool) that simulates Qwest Field’s crowd noise.
The person outside the sound booth could hear me but I was yelling my balls off. I can’t imagine doing that for a whole game.
http://www.thealexandrian.net/images/20150218h.jpg
That type of throw will not get you w juice box.
http://cdn4.gurl.com/wp-content/gallery/90s-drinks/squeeze-its.jpg
http://underscoopfire.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/little-hug-drink.jpg
Wow Eli. Wow
I really, really hate Gruden, he might be worse than Simms.
Wait, are you Dan Snyder in disguise?
I don’t know, PHEEEEEEL
PHEEEEEEL will always be the worst because of that cornpone accent he puts on.
Collins is still worse though.
I forgot all about him, my god, imagine all three together.
Damn I miss Pat and John.
Pat missed most of the 70s and 80s.