Our own Hippo has been in a bit of a funk lately, so I thought I’d give it a shot to fill the void

Let’s get going!

Panthers 23 – Saints 20

Fuck you very much Drew Brees and Cam Newton!  Like my fantasy football season wasn’t down the shitter already, you decide to BOTH suck my left nut.  And you totally ignore the right one. SHAME on you!

Steelers 24 – Browns 9

While this would have been a fun one to see on TV, I can completely understand why almost no one in the country saw it.  I mean, only a certain segment of the population likes to watch grown men take away baseballs from little kids and they really need to be locked up.

Cowboys 27 – Ravens 17

After kicking their ass last week, the Cowboys did the Steelers a solid and took care of the Ravens at home.  DAK continues to kick ass and sales of Viagra in the Metroplex have been reduced to nothing.

Lions 26 – Jaguars 19

I’m very happy that I slept through the morning slate of games.  Watching this game must have been as depressing as living in Detroit.  Hey, at least the Lions won and are still in the hunt for the NFC North title.  Did I mention that the Norths suck?

Colts 24 – Titans 17

Marcus didn’t start balling until late in the game but it was a case of too little too late for the Titans. Luckily, the division leader doesn’t exist, so they still have a shot!

Bills 16 – Bengals 12

The Bills, of all teams, also did the Steelers a solid and beat the hapless Bengals.  Just going over the boxscore and hooboy that game was a barnburner, wasn’t it?  It’s a good thing nothing happened that would impact fantasy football seasons!

Buccaneers 19 – Chiefs 17

In Kansas City too, which goes to show you that I was right when I said that the Chiefs are the most suspect 7-2 team ever.  Well, they’re not anymore because they’re 7-3, but you get the point.

Giants 22 – Bears 16

Speaking of, how the fuck are the Giants 7-3?!?  Not that I mind, of course.  Any time that the Giants are in position to go to the Super Bowl and fuck up the Patriots’ season, I’m a happy guy.

Vikings 30 – Cardinals 24

So, is this the point in the season where Cardinals fans start looking forward to next year?  I know Blax has already called it but this game was probably the death blow, wasn’t it?

Rams – Dolphins

This is what I wrote on my Rams preview:

Sunday November 20 – Miami Dolphins – 1:05 local time

Upside:  Daniel Tosh will be there!

Downside: Daniel Tosh will be there!

Prediction:  The USC-UCLA game happens the day before at the Rose Bowl.  If you think this town will support two 100,000 football games back to back, I have some beachfront property in Riverside I’d like to sell you.   Reduced attendance as all the money will go towards the college game and no one in Miami wants to fly to LA.  My buddy may end up having to give these away.

Game prediction: After another road win at the Jets, the Rams will continue their quest towards .500 with another win over a NFC East opponent. 5-5 record so far.

/feels tap on shoulder

WHAT?

“Um, the Rams lost.  Fisher went conservative in the fourth quarter and snatched defeat from the jaws of victory.”

Dolphins 14 – Rams 10

Patriots 30 – 49ers 17

The only suspenseful part of this game was if Tom Brady would stay in the game long enough to get hurt and end his career.  As Hippo well knows, the things we most want don’t happen and those that we don’t do.

Seahawks 26 Eagles 15

This was actually a really good game and redeemed the early slate of NFL shitfulness.  Up until halftime when the Seahawks pretty much took over.  It was still better than the other games.

Washington 42 – Packers 24

I went to Chili’s for dinner and was watching the game at the bar and I had the baby back ribs and let me tell you, I was licking the sauce off those bones and licking my fingers with such gusto that I think I made some people uncomfortable.  Tough shit.  I like my Chili’s ribs.

And tonight we get the RAAAAIIIIIDERRRRRSSSS in Mexico City!  Plus, my ass is on vacation this entire week!

Enjoy the MNF game, everyone!  Eat a taco.