As Pat Benatar once said, “Loving Football is a Battlefield”* and we’ve got a near-impossible obstacle to hurdle directly in front of our eyebulbs. Perhaps you’ll choose other entertainment options-whatever you do, pop in and say “Hell!” or “Hello”, it makes no matter. Let us know what you’re up to, why you’re doing it, how much you’re being paid for it and what kinds of decisions led to the moral abyss you currently inhabit. No one is going to laugh and point unless you’re the kind that gets off on that sort of thing. Freak. Again, this is a no-judgement zone. TO THE GAME!

Mia/NYJ-Clipboard-fancier extraordinaire Matty “No Ice in my Room Temperature Water” Moore gets the start for the Finskis. He’s tossed the ball in games that matter a total of 35 times since 2012 so he should be good for an interception or two. “What about his fumbling? Is that an issue?”, you ask, out of turn as usual. Sighing, I reply, “why yes, in fact he has fumbled the ball 23 times in 25 starts”. So of course the Jets D is going stripping tonight. Bryce Petty has a much smaller body of work but the stat sheet says that he’s at 50% on throws that involve some sort of ability yet is an Alex Smith-like (10 for 10) in his check-down passing. What makes this game entertaining to me is that the weather in East Rutherford is going to be a big fat mess. Cheer for one of these teams, Mother Nature or that solid prop bet you just made. (the “over” on # of turnovers) I’ll see you on the other side.

Done. GIVE IT TO ME!

*walks off into the darkness whistling