I know I’ve claimed in the past to be mailing it in. But people…listen to me. Hear me…..
This week, I’m truly mailing it in.
You’ll get your Sexay…don’t get me wrong. But I’m not invested. My mind is quite literally thousands of miles away. And maybe that’s not a bad thing.
I mean who really wants to read the absurd crap that falls out of my brain from week to week, anyway? Hell, even I don’t.
But worry not….that post title above won’t hurt you.
“Bi-Curious”
The first and last parts of this TGISF are being written on the east coast. On somewhat of a compressed schedule due to someone (me) procrastinating for far too long this week and last weekend. Then, the finishing touches will be done on the west coast. Hopefully after chemical intervention and a nice relaxing soak in the hotel Jacuzzi, preferably with naked chicks. But I’ll settle for just the solo relaxing soak via chemical intervention….
Bi-COASTAL.
Yes…Bi-Coastal…that is what this week’s TGISF will be, more or less. And I’m CURIOUS how bad this will turn out to be, given that I’m hurried on one coast (east) and will likely be tired on the other (west).
Bi. Curious.
Yes, it is indeed quite a reach just to get to a shitty title. I agree. But still, get your minds out of the gutter.
Here….have some music….
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Open Call
I was having so much trouble deciding on a theme this week that I placed an open request at the poker table for theme idea submissions. Yes, I knew better. But I thought it would be funny. It…Was…Not. Those guys are sickos.
Anyway, note to self: Don’t solicit theme ideas at the poker table EVAR again.
(and also, yes….I still have no idea what this week’s theme will be yet…shut up)
–
Left Coast Sports
Originally I had headed this section as “Bi-Curious Sports”, but that header was a misnomer because I didn’t write any of the sports on the east coast. I suppose I haven’t written any on the west coast yet either, actually. Maybe I should go ahead and do that…
NHL
Frankly, after watching the Caps roll over for Yinzburgh yet one more goddamned time this year, I’m not sure I want to be writing anything re: sports this week anyway. Sadly there’s at least one more game to go before this shitshow of a series will mercifully end. And the next time Sidney Crosby intentionally head butts Matt Niskanen’s stick, he should face fines and a hefty suspension…
SEE??? Look how dirty of a play that was. He could have very easily broken Matt’s stick there. There is no place for that sort of play in today’s game. #hockeysticklivesmatter
(yes I’m joking and yes I sincerely hope he can skate Saturday night vs Caps…srsly. More importantly, I hope his brain is OK and that he can stop banging it around all the time bcuz that’s bad for it…again srsly)
Last night, there were smoothies to be had as the Rangers pounded on Ottawa for a little while to knot that series up at 2 games apiece.
Tonight:
- Preds @ Blues – 8:00pmEDT NBCSN (NSH leads 3-1)
- Oilers @ Ducks – 10:30pmEDT NBCSN (tied 2-2)
MLB
Standings and tonight’s schedule is all you get. Because I’m tired and there’s plenty more boring summer days yet ahead of us for me to talk about baseball and cause a massive narcolepsy outbreak among DFO’ers.
NBA
Meh. Here you go if you care. No real surprises thus far other than Utah over the Clippers in the first round, and even that was only a mild upset. Contrary to what I hear most people say, I actually find the NBA more boring come playoff time. Which is impressive considering how boring I already find it during the regular season.
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Free Hat
OK then…I guess it’s gonna be a “pick one out of the hat” week then. Like no shit…Imma pick a theme/name out of the hat (it’s my Ravens SB XLVII hat btw…ah, good times). But no shit, I planned for this…..so here we go…..
Big Money, Big Money……NO WHAMMIES!!!!!! STOP!!!!
(well shit)
–
I mean….yay.
Actually she is one of my favorites, or else she wouldn’t have been in teh hat to begin with. But I guess I was hoping for a themed theme. But this is good.
Ladies and Gentleman….Mr. Conway Twitty….
Oh shit…I mean….
The lovely and talented, Ms. Amber Heard, Everybody!!!!!.
HEY WAIT A MINUTE!!!!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ll6CNFVFTC8
(google…google…google)
Ha!!! I knew it, I knew I remembered that correctly. Also, I love when the hat and fate convene.
It seems this week’s princess has also been a little curious….from time to time.
(not a judgement)
Then she ended up with Johnny Depp….
(totally AM judging her for that, however)
((also, isn’t being with Johnny Depp kinda like still being a lesbian anyway?))
Anywhoooo…no worries Amber. We still love ya. And you’re still pretty danged cute.
Enjoy….
And last, but by no means least……
Hummina hummina….
–
A tWBS Springtime Floral Photo
I like flowers, we’ve already established this. Zip it.
I dabble in black and white occasionally, mostly just for fun and learning. But usually they don’t turn out particularly impressively. This one I liked tho…
–
Obligatory Alexa Is Obligatory
OK Alexa, we don’t have a reservation so we need to get there early. Otherwise, I know you… When they tell us there are no rooms left you’ll climb up on something and jump on the poor desk clerk. And then that will be one more hotel we can never stay in again.
Right, just like that. Also, how’d you get up on top of the car that fast…? And ouch, I didn’t mean do it to me!!!
Yeah, I’m not sorry either now that you mention it. Why don’t you get up there again and give it one more go, in fact? Just please first, take the belt off this time? That thing hitting me in the groin is not ideal….
I think maybe we should see other people….
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Alrighty then. That’s all I’ve got. Hopefully by the time you read this I’ll already be hammered and soaking. Naked girls accepted, but not necessary.
Love ya’s.
Have a good weekend, nerds.
–
I would murder everyone in this room for a handful of sweet, sweet boob.
I would be offended if you wouldn’t
I would help you murder everyone else so you would let me live, just for the record. I am on Team getting you boob.
If you spare me, I’ll let you squeeze my moobs for….let’s call it 30 seconds.
h
ttp://68.media.tumblr.com/8b373cf8cb7c298c50581ed4a937a728/tumblr_noklr12FZV1s86xn7o1_500.jpg
I don’t get white people…
The LA Riots should have just expanded until all us whiteys was ded
Luckily, nobody “got” him on his way down and I hope he broke both legs.
http://68.media.tumblr.com/51de1135ebb4bb2745b9c4439c2b3c6f/tumblr_oatxvsdk7m1qgxas2o1_1280.jpg
If you already know this young lady biblically:
-You’re not leaning on my leather in a wet bathing suit are you?
-You didn’t finish the hazelnut did you? Because if there’s nothing but French Vanilla left we’re going to have a problem.
-You know the neighbors can see you, right?
I’d have to go full Cutler on all those issues,
Claws and spray. Damn.
http://68.media.tumblr.com/f4dbcf0091a507c26c81daa41122c1de/tumblr_oaq6x1ZYMl1urwuzno1_1280.jpg
http://68.media.tumblr.com/46912180fe774f61424f11b7fe161d10/tumblr_o9fiiht7G91unw9q0o1_1280.jpg
yes, she can smell her own
I know her. At least I think it’s her.
I had that same dream.
LOL.
I’m actually serious. Russian gal. Very sweet. About 99.9% sure it’s her. I’ve just not seen this photo. If it’s not her, she has a separated at birth twin.
Oooooh….that’s an interesting thought.
Jesus! Your dream was EXACTLY like mine…… WEIRD!
LMFAO
😛
http://68.media.tumblr.com/b3905448f6d74a20c4dd5e47e2f0cfe7/tumblr_ocb4lvSupi1qm0hswo1_540.jpg
oh my. That is beyond glorious.
Makes me wanna paint something….vigorously.
White wash.
Goal, Ice #BFIB!!!
I really am wasting my day watching Guardians 2 reviews. My new favorite person to hate describes Gamora as “the one with resting bitch face”.
I want to be petty and make a joke about his 52 mL penis but I don’t have an account that isn’t linked to my main email
Have you seen the porn parody? Quite good.
NSFW, obvs
https://woodrocket.com/videos/gnardians-of-the-galaxy-part-1
http://68.media.tumblr.com/72eb5a27ca82827d0efd6852edfb2c77/tumblr_obq8mw4aWt1sukn3wo1_500.jpg
I miss all the good Halloween parties.
There is no way this photo is SFW
No nipples, no lips, no pubs, no penetration; SFDFO. SF is not SFW anyway.
No pubs??????
http://esq.h-cdn.co/assets/15/29/1436821150-the-worlds-end-gif.gif
In the photograph. Down the street; different story!
Non-practical onesie.
Practical is overrated.
You leave her alone. She’s doing just fine.
Maybe I’m wrong; it is well ventilated. Probs cool ‘n’ breezy on a hot summer’s day.
NSFW redhead again
h
ttp://68.media.tumblr.com/2c7d3e0727770db83b5ca47b3801da3e/tumblr_nrj0saVALI1usad4to1_500.jpg
YUM
Does Amber Heard have cinematic or other video experience chawin’ on some box??
/asking FOAR a friend
I’m sure she does. On her phone/computer.
so…I need a 12-year old Rooskie to get that for me then
http://68.media.tumblr.com/ddbbb1b7b081108d9e32b2b209475876/tumblr_mwwu0xgB6Y1sg5jfho1_400.png
http://68.media.tumblr.com/909ee835131e86da8bc8170c0e3ba338/tumblr_oaxdoo0FmV1v5cpozo1_500.gif
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UclCCFNG9q4
That Best Coast song is teh tits in and of itself.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9jFnBcoJW6A&ab_channel=eidderfreddie
I just had a real Wisconsin moment while out for a cig. Asshole playing the worst rap ever. I assume it was his white boy rap, with volume that carried 30 blocks, in a trash truck that had no muffler because that is what people do here.
I actually never saw the car, but it was a trash truck. I could hear it and I live here.
Arriflex 16-S camera with Schneider 16mm, 25mm, and 75mm lenses and a 400′ magazine.
I see a Bullet Bra L6082, a pearl necklace, and an easily disregarded wedding band.
Hee hee.
Well played, jerk.
I mentioned I might have watched Guardians 2 early and now I am watching reviews of it. It pisses me off more than usual when they can’t get basic facts right while critiquing it because I loved it. It was in no way a perfect movie, but getting basic facts wrong annoys me and much more when I like the film.
Some people write those without ever watching the film. Shocking, i know.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v12jFhYlhz8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V8KrTC_o48o
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLj8SUdaPqE&ab_channel=SeattleMarksJoint3
Stupid filters. https://gfycat.com/TartFinishedChuckwalla
It’ll be nice when someone uploads the text-free, better quality versions.
German sure needs a ton of letters for “skinny hipster chick”
That’s no way to refer to a hero of the rebellion. #resist
NSFW https://gfycat.com/ShyFineAlpinegoat
I need to write and that means reading up on some recently-released material but goddamn it, I don’t want to.
I also drank 600 calories of liquid sugar and caffeine at Starbucks and then got a venti cold brew to cut that and I may have made a huge mistake.
That is great fucking camera work right there!
Again NSFW
h
ttp://68.media.tumblr.com/57ad3b4d2b8ed1670183c8f48132a753/tumblr_nw5kwqpUnB1qgvzq6o1_500.jpg
http://68.media.tumblr.com/2b9b15df8a91409ec44ae31cdda29286/tumblr_nwqxeqvmpt1u80n99o1_500.jpg
NSFW redhead
h
ttp://68.media.tumblr.com/b258941c570e249416f8a28631885872/tumblr_nxuv7oNnfA1tyamjko1_500.jpg
I wonder if the pussy’s fur is a 100% match
It’s a shame Moose blew his load in the HRTN comments.
….other than my eyes…apparently.
?w=650
She very pretty.
She gots shoulders which would even melt a Hippo’s heart.
The bike makes that from good to great
Just for the record. I drank entirely too much as night. Woke up today and expected I had a paper and 4 labs due. None of them are due for awhile. So I did the responsible thing. Not eating at all and taking 2-4 “shots” (they are always doubles at least). I can still pass as sober if I have to but I am not.
I woke up and was like IS THERE ANYTHING I NEED TO APOLOGIZE FOR??? And sometimes I never really know.
I just assume you guys will mock me if I get too bad. I actually feel bad you guys just let me be
As if we’re not willing to mock you when you’re sober?
Wilford Brimley’s turn in The Firm? Not enough dieabeetus for me…
http://iv1.lisimg.com/image/5172772/600full-elizabeth-shue.jpg
If the Shue fits…….
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-U9jetbL7xHU/TaQWAKk8dYI/AAAAAAAAAUc/PdzxHZrWTxY/s760/large_leaving_las_vegas_blu-ray3.jpg
I’d rather be
I was beautiful yesterday. This morning it was raining, but now it’s cloudy. I’m saying I need an excuse to post this.
“I was beautiful yesterday.”
If that pic is you, then yes, you were.
But it’s not, is it? You teasing bastard.
Hi
http://dailywot.com/wp-content/uploads/miranda-6.jpg
I never understand why you have to write 5000 words for a sexy Friday. This is an easy job. Skimming it I did go back to the 90’s for some Bloodhound Gang. I do love your work sir.
Fair enough.
And thank you.