Your “Gonna Get High, Gonna Have Some Fun” Saturday Evening Open Thread

Beerguyrob

Beerguyrob

A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
Beerguyrob

 

Hope you all had yourselves a lovely day. The rain has finally returned (with a vengeance) to Vancouver. The highlight has been the traffic broadcasts; there was one point this week where the local newsradio reporter just gave up & said, “What’s wrong with people?” For example: we have this bridge called the Port Mann,

which used to have tolls, so cheap people would avoid it like it gave cars herpes. It has 10 lanes, and was designed with the intention of getting people more quickly out of town – to where the cheap real estate is/was. But hardly anyone wanted to pay the $3.50 each way, so they would drive out of the way to free crossings, choking traffic on roads not designed for that volume, usually adding 15-30 minutes to their commute. Well, the new socialist government eliminated the toll on September 1st, and traffic volume across it has increased by 35000 cars/day. GOTTA MAKE UP TIME! Shockingly, there has been a corresponding increase in collisions which has baffled traffic planners. Add in torrential downpours and you’ve got a recipe for quite the disaster. Idiots.


Sunday’s broadcast maps: courtesy the folks at 506sports.com

CBS EARLY


 Anchorage AK  |   Fairbanks AK
 Honolulu HI

Carolina @ Chicago Ian Eagle, Dan Fouts
Baltimore @ Minnesota Greg Gumbel, Trent Green
Jacksonville @ Indianapolis Tom McCarthy, Steve Beuerlein, Steve Tasker
Tennessee @ Cleveland Spero Dedes, Adam Archuleta
NO GAME due to local team at home on FOX

I want to pick all visiting teams for these ones, but I know Baltimore will let me down. Also, seeing how the Truth Biscuit does against a Kuechly-less Panthers defence should be educational.

Virginia McCaskey wants to dip him in Ovaltine.

 

CBS LATE


 Anchorage AK  |   Fairbanks AK
 Honolulu HI

Cincinnati @ Pittsburgh Jim Nantz, Tony Romo
Seattle @ NY Giants Andrew Catalon, James Lofton
Denver @ LA Chargers Kevin Harlan, Rich Gannon
NO GAME due to local team at home on FOX

Honest opinion: all three sets of announcers for these games are actually tolerable. Romo keeps a leash on Nantz’s more inane tendencies.

 

FOX SINGLE


 Anchorage AK  |   Fairbanks AK
 Honolulu HI

New Orleans @ Green Bay Kenny Albert, Charles Davis
NY Jets @ Miami Dan Hellie, Chris Spielman
Arizona vs LA Rams (in London) Sam Rosen, Ronde Barber
Tampa Bay @ Buffalo Chris Myers, Daryl Johnston
Dallas @ San Francisco (LATE) Thom Brennaman, Troy Aikman

Do you think Troy looks forward to the MLB playoffs because it means no jerkwad Joe Buck beside him for a month? Does the time apart help their relationship?

Discuss.


Tonight’s sports:

  • MLB: GAME 7 BAY-BAY!
    • Yankees at Astros – 8:00PM | FS1 / Sportsnet
  • NCAA: (of note)
    • LSU at Mississippi – 7:15PM | ESPN
    • Michigan at Penn State – 7:30PM | ABC / TSN2
    • Southern California at Notre Dame – 7:30PM | NBC
    • Kansas at TCU – 8:00PM | FOX
    • Wyoming at Boise State – 10:15PM | ESPN2
    • Colorado at Washington State – 10:45PM | ESPN
  • CFL:
    • Eskimos at Lions – 10:00PM | TSN
  •  NHL:
    • Leafs at Senators – 7:00PM | CBC
    • Panthers at Capitals – 7:30PM | NBCSN
    • Wild at Flames – 10:00PM | CBC
  • Futbol:
    • 2017 U-17 World Cup:
      • Quarterfinal – USA vs. England – 12:30AM | TSN2
        • Live Stream: Fox Soccer Match Pass, Telemundo, fuboTV (U.S)

Why are they having the London game the same time as the regular block? Do they want folks to not see it? When I’m up early walking the dogs, I want the comfort of knowing there’s a game amongst the infomercials. THANKS FOR NOTHING, ROGER!

Beerguyrob
Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.

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Unsurprised
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Unsurprised

OH GOD FUCKING DAMN IT, USC! YOU HAD ONE MOTHERFUCKING JOB!

Brick Meathook
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Brick Meathook

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Unsurprised
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Unsurprised

Calm your tits?

BrettFavresColonoscopy
Member

Just rewatched the tWBS origin episode of Archer. Awesome sauce.

Brick Meathook
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Brick Meathook

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Gratliff
Member

Ah, yes. The man who created the content creation model that would make Led Zeppelin legendary.

Wakezilla
Member

Elvis is kneeling! He wasn’t an American patriot afterall! This has Putin written all over this

Brick Meathook
Member
Brick Meathook

Gratliff
Member

At what point did Voodoo get mixed into the retail store safe Halloween playlist? I’ve heard it 4000 times this week.

Unsurprised
Member
Unsurprised

Voodoo Child would at least be tolerable. Speaking of which:

Gratliff
Member

I’ll never forgive how WCW and Hulk Hogan poisoned that song for me.
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Unsurprised
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Unsurprised

The last vestige of my childhood died when I learned about Hulk Hogan doing steroids. My opinion of him has only grown exponentially worse as time goes on.

Senor Weaselo
Member

That reminds me. Fuck I don’t have a Halloween costume and I can’t go as Morty again like I did two years ago.

Unsurprised
Member
Unsurprised

Evil Morty?

Senor Weaselo
Member

In a pinch.

Gratliff
Member

I only ever throw on a mask. Makes it easy. Last year was F Society. I wanted something luchaish, but I didn’t have the foresight to order one of the bootlegs out of Mexico in time. I’m hoping next year they’ll have a Matanza Cueto mask available. I feel like a stocky half-80’s slasher monster/half-aztec god vessel would be easy to pull off.
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Unsurprised
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Unsurprised

Neat

Senor Weaselo
Member

I got home. But now I’m sober.
/Remembers he has a lesson to teach at 10:30
Boo.

Unsurprised
Member
Unsurprised

That’s plenty of time to get drunk and sober up.

Wakezilla
Member

Oh men and ladies. I just polished off an XL Italian feast with double the meat and cheese pizza by myself. I feel like death is imminent. I downed it with a couple of long island iced eas, which isn’t helping.

Re Port Man bridge : I had no problems paying the toll so I could have a VIP Road experience. Now it’s such bullshit with all the traffic and the bridge is a death trap when it rains (not like we’re in a city nicknamed Raincouver or anything) because the rain just sits there like it’s a tub.

Tldr: I’d be OK with tolling every bridge for like 50 cents if the government would put all the money into a separate bridge/road repair account and not the multi account shot they do now where the money magically disappears for something else

Unsurprised
Member
Unsurprised

Congratulations. If I had the means, we could’ve had a competition.

Unsurprised
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Unsurprised

Well, that was a stupid rabbit hole to post down into.

Brick Meathook
Member
Brick Meathook

Listening to the Boise St game is strange because I keep hearing “Rypien” and what sounds like “Kosar.” Then I look over at the TV and field is blue. What a world, what a world.

Brick Meathook
Member
Brick Meathook

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Unsurprised
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Unsurprised

I think your engine might be running a little hot.

WCS
Member

So… that was a lot of fun…

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Croooow
Member
Croooow

Washington State has one of the cooler logos in college sports.

King Hippo
Member

yeah, it may be my very favourite helmet

Brick Meathook
Member
Brick Meathook

Here’s the HMS Groovy, the most far out ship in the Royal Navy
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Brick Meathook
Member
Brick Meathook

During the war the Germans were about to sink her but the U-boat’s captain and crew were so mesmerized that they just stared at her and forgot what they were doing.

King Hippo
Member

mein gott, it’s a trip!

Brick Meathook
Member
Brick Meathook

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King Hippo
Member

merde, why TCU/Iowa State have to be in the same window (3:30) as Notre Dame/NC State next week? All the primetime fixtures are poo again.

Horatio Cornblower
Member

My dog is glaring at me. i think he’s had enough of my mourning-the-end-of-the-baseball-season shit.

AND THAT MEANS IT’S TIME TO DRINK A BEER!!!!

King Hippo
Member

Bear Down holds on.

scotchnaut
Member

The War on Drugs was phenomenal! That Adam dude can shred like a motherfucker.

/my son is walking three feet above the ground right now
//and the Senators beat the shithead Leafs!
///it’s been a fine day.

King Hippo
Member

Love going for 2 when have ball 2nd in 2OT. Proper use of leverage.

King Hippo
Member

Berkeley Bush Push!

Croooow
Member
Croooow

Speaking of the Big 12: TCU and Iowa State next week for first place. Who saw that coming?

King Hippo
Member

turns out, Cyclones just needed to put they MLB in at QB. Seems so obvs in retrospect, no?

Croooow
Member
Croooow

Local media here is required to mention Joel Lanning switched from QB to MLB at least 40 times a day.

King Hippo
Member

wow, GREAT onside kick but counsinfuckers recover

Viva La Tabula Raza
Member
Viva La Tabula Raza

Why would Boise State purposely wear uniforms the same color as their field? Seems it would make it tough for the QB to see his receivers downfield. I guess that strategy has worked for the Philadelphia Eagles for years, though. Can’t argue with success!

Croooow
Member
Croooow

Thank goodness.

King Hippo
Member

BayBay takes a sack on the 2-pointer. No smire.

WCS
Member

Honestly, I don’t complain about the refs. You win or lose by what you do on the field. But, holy crap on a stick….

blaxabbath
Member

Cal is out of steam.

King Hippo
Member

well, don’t expect them to switch to coal, Mister Man!!

King Hippo
Member

reminder – BayBay once had 1st and goal at the 2

King Hippo
Member

reminder – WV had a 38-13 Q4 lead.

Spur
Member
Spur

Princess Stephanie and Mr. Toughest Road got the ejection. Looks like they’re pissed the refs wouldn’t kiss their ass.

https://streamable.com/ibryo
https://streamable.com/vxko1

laserguru
Member

One of the interesting things about this town is it harbors a lot of people trying to integrate themselves into American culture. This is a beautiful town!
They have so much hope.
Welcome!

King Hippo
Member

Cal/AZ, in a very sad OT battle

/also BayBay back to within one score of cousinfuckers, thanks to WCS’ ingratitude

Croooow
Member
Croooow

I’d love to see Baylor go 0-12.

King Hippo
Member

too bad they play KS. They’d have a legit shot.

Croooow
Member
Croooow

Looking at the schedule: The game’s in Lawrence. So maybe there’s a chance?

King Hippo
Member

HUZZAH!

theeWeeBabySeamus
Member

I have FS2 but no PAC12N so my flip option is limited.

Wazzu and the Buffs is tres boring, btw.

King Hippo
Member

my FS2 is SD, so it’s like watching in 2002

theeWeeBabySeamus
Member

My FS2 is actually in HD. But for some reason, DirecTV seems to have decided to completely cut PAC12N from the lineup after beta testing it.

blaxabbath
Member

Targeting calls and injuries have made UA limp this one out.

King Hippo
Member

targeting is the worst

Romonobyl
Member

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Viva La Tabula Raza
Member
Viva La Tabula Raza

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Spur
Member
Spur

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Viva La Tabula Raza
Member
Viva La Tabula Raza

Can’t find one of Boyd Crowder doing his clogging, dangit.
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Horatio Cornblower
Member

Gotcha covered. Skip to :40

Spanky Datass
Member
Spanky Datass

I feel a bit dirty for being happy that the Dirt Oilers are in the WS. But … FUCK THE YANKEES! … AND DODGERS … hopefully …

Horatio Cornblower
Member

Yeah, I feel kinda dirty but I have to root for the AL. Go Astros.

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Romonobyl
Member

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Senor Weaselo
Member

Fuck Dave Roberts for eternity?

Horatio Cornblower
Member

I hate the end of baseball. Time to suck it up until pitchers and catchers report in February. I wonder how I’ll get…

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Oh, never mind. Figured it out.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Member
Viva La Tabula Raza

Is that Melania’s body double?

King Hippo
Member

Me likey the end of el beisbol, because it means the footy gets good. And I should concentrates on that anyway.

End of football? (which I consider after the NFC and AFC championship games, Superb Owl is seldom real footbaw) – that’s suicide contemplation season

theeWeeBabySeamus
Member

8/10, would join her hot stove league.

Romonobyl
Member

I’m sure there’s a bit of Photoshopping involved, but she strikes me as joltingly attractive. There’s a lot of hotties posted on here, but she stands out for some reason.
I’ll be in my trailer…

Horatio Cornblower
Member

It’s Maxim; that’s so photoshopped it probably started out as John Cena.

Spur
Member
Spur

Fuck you Buck. You want me to feel sorry for the Yankees?

King Hippo
Member

especially when it’s “cover your asshole” time, come 2019-2025 for everyone else

Horatio Cornblower
Member

God I can’t wait. I haven’t seen my team win a World Series since 2009 and I…
/beaten to death by Cleveland fans
//judge rules it justifiable homicide

King Hippo
Member

hey, if youse quit being a franchise, my #BFIB could maybe catch you in total championships after 100 years or so. No other franchise can say that!

Viva La Tabula Raza
Member
Viva La Tabula Raza

Yeah. Boo-fucking-hoo.

King Hippo
Member

Congrats, Colt 45s!

/sorry, Horatio’s liver

Horatio Cornblower
Member

Oh that thing’s long past your pity making a difference.

Croooow
Member
Croooow

I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that the Kansas Jayhawks are not good at football.

Spur
Member
Spur

They still beat Texas.

King Hippo
Member

the soft bigotry of low expectations ,, smh

JerBear50
Member
JerBear50

Hey, what if we took every sports commentator that you despise with every fiber of your being, way, way down deep in the pit of your stomach, and put them ALL on the same network? Huh? Wouldn’t that be a great business plan?

Unsurprised
Member
Unsurprised

Then we only need one truck bomb.