Nothing brings excitement to the air like the anticipation of Arizona/Seattle national games!
The battle for mid-tier rights in a garbage division turns the dial all way up to seven tonight as Russell Wilson and his Duane Brown-reinforced invisible offensive line prepare for a shootout with Adrian Peterson and “The Quarterback Who Held Off BLAINE GABBERT”, Drew Stanton. Aging-but-solid backfields for both squad should provide explosive hits in novelty uniforms and adequate fodder for I HAVEN’T SEEN TWO UGLIES BUMP THIS HARD SINCE _____ takes. So slap on your Kangol and jam an entire Fruit By The Foot into your mouth (just like you jam that Loose Change DVD into your Xbox) and get ready for some football-on-3-days-rest!
This Gen Stat of the Game:
Combined record of 4 teams Cardinals beat: 5-21 All in last place in division.
Combined record of final 8 opponents: 34-30, 33-23 minus NYG.— Jody Oehler (@radiojody) November 7, 2017
Seahawks/Cardinals: Vegas has SEA -5.5 (O/U 41.5). A final score of 18 to 25 seems quite implausible in the modern NFL but it does kind of make sense for these two teams. The redbirds D is a competent matchup for the Seahawks while Arizona’s Drew Stanton-led offense appears (to this sports expert’s surprise) to be alright with focusing on just handing the ball to Adrian Peterson. Seattle (5-3) is a game behind RAMMIT after falling at home to the [*Redacted] s while the Cardinals (4-4) are a paper swan — with half their wins having come against SF –who need to, starting tonight, double-up on SEA and beat RAMMIT during DFO-con to have any real shot at a tie-breaker-based division title playoff birth.
Fantasy Notes: Eddie Lacy is out (groin/overactive chewing) so you’re gonna want to plug n play Thomas Rawls (or, not — ARI has a strong rush D). Dion Jordan is expected to make his first appearance for Seattle because, hey, it’s been a few years since Pete Carroll has gotten some production out of an injury-prone headcase. Only Arizona player worth starting is Peterson so, naturally, I have Fitz plugged in and expect JJ Nelson to record 75% of Drew Stanton 165 yards on the YACs of two passes.
For those of you who aren’t interested in Seizure Rush TNF, a lean night:
- JV Football
- Georgia Southern (0-8) at Appalachian State (5-4) — 7:30PM | ESPNU
- North Carolina (1-8) at Pittsburgh (4-5) [from Heinz Field] — 7:30PM | ESPN
- NBA:
- Cleveland Cavaliers at Houston Rockets — 8:00PM | TNT
- Oklahoma City Thunder at Denver Nuggets — 10:30PM | TNT
- Womens Soccer:
- Canada vs. U.S. — 10:00PM | ESPN2
- Young Sheldon
- Poker, Faith, and Eggs — 8:00PM | CBS
…. — -.-. -.- . -.– / –. .- — . / .- -.. -.. . -.. / .- / – …. .. .-. -.. –..– / .. -. … – .-. ..- — . -. – .- .-.. / …- . – . .-. .- -. … / … — -. –. / -… . ..-. — .-. . / – …. . / –. .- — . .-.-.-
Sorry, I can’t understand that. If you’re going to comment, comment in ‘Merican.
I think he’s been captured!
Fuck this new format.
He’s blinking “SOS” with his eyelids!
Thank You! At least somebody cares.
ALL HAIL THIS GLORIOUS BLEERGH’S DAY
No Cris, if neither of them had tried at all, then THAT would have been like watching the Pro Bowl.
+ two
I gots to groat to bed but before I great, I have to say that Hero is the garbest commenter to ever goat.
Geriously.
This is Graat
Graat the Iggles fan? Yu changed ure name?
That edible I tried for the first time Saturday night finally kicked in! The Seahawks are invisible man!
Started reading that and was thinking cool. Finished reading it with a heh heh.
Ditto
The fucked comments really help take away from the fact that those Truther unis are burning holes in my retinas
I sent you a message on twitter Grat concerning the bye week.
Dammit Pitt.
Go sit in the corner and think about what you just did.
How bad is it? I just have NFL game on radio and this here blog on phone.
Dude was literally crossing the goal line, would have given Pitt a 24-21 halftime lead. Fumbles at the goal line, Holes return it back to the Pitt 40(ish) with about a minute in the half. Fortunately they’re so inept they only got 3 out of it. 24-17 Holes lead at the half.
Did you guys know that Jimmy Graham used to play bocce ball?
Pete Carroll choose those colors because he thinks the Lizard People can’t see it the ultraviolet spectrum. It’s just a test run, let’s see who complains to the FCC.
[prays to god that Spur is all out of bubblegum]
Does Nike really hate Seattle this much? Because that’s the only explanation for this color.
Maybe. But RW seems like he wants to keep his’n thumbs.
Is this what those early X-File message boards were like?
No…there was more slash fiction postings going on about Mulder and Cancer Man…
I want to believe in this comment.
I hope the NFL eventually decides to go with tie-dye uniforms on the Color Rush nights.
I think we all know who really caused the site crash:
Plus one.
I bet it smelled like a slaughterhouse in that Woodstock VW hippie van when it was full of all those unbathed people.
That’s all I can think about when I see that ad. Tis like smell-o-vision.
I feel for Trump. The Russians clearly hacked us last night and now we deal with change and like an old crazy person we do not deal with it well.
Louie C.K. is a dick puller too? I heard the rumors but i was thinking he did that when he was younger. Not to justify but young people are dumb.
“But boy did they flip the field there with that fumble…”
Yeah, Cris. That was really fucking exciting to see them gain a field position advantage.
How did the SeaTruthers not score for Hippo? Shitfuckasses.
Oh yeah, football’s on, I think. Let’s tune in and pray for a meteor…
*turns on TV*
The FUCK am I looking at?
Spouse: That’s it, you all are fired.
Yeaux. Anyone else’s fantasy team taste the hot sting of instant death today with the Zeke news? * sigh*
Can’t draft Cowboys out of principle. As an Eagles fan this gives me great joy.
Eat a DDT flavor dick.
Double J is going scratched Earth about this.
I still love you Spur.
My 8-1 money league side has Alfred Morris and as of the 8pm waivers, Rod Smith.
I’m ok with it.
Instant?
Yeah, but my season was already in the shitter anyway.
So…no images…no gifs…have to refresh the page to see new comments….and then scroll all the way down to make a comment…
Is the DNC the website admin?
+1
If I wasn’t so new here and feeling it’s not really my place to criticize at this point, I would be paraphrasing Prince “Gonna have a website like it’s 1999.” But I am so I won’t.
Let’s Go AD!……fuck!
That asshole is no Zeke.
AP fumble. Drink.
*sips coffee 🙁
I thought that LArry Fitzgerald went to the University of Phoenix.
Well his checked cleared…that is usually good enough for at least a bachelors…
…and Russell Wilson gets it into Jimmy Graham in the post…
That’s pretty X-rated for so early in the evening, dontcha think? Elisha might still be awake and watching!!
+1 like
/manuel Like
Evening commentists, I hope you are all well. These jerseys are fucking awesome.
High visibility jackets for all!
Sulu Dance?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lFzRNWf7Gi0
I too was happy about the election results in the Garden State.
All your colour are beloung to us.
” Jersey! You son of a bitch. I didn’t give consent!”
-Awesome
Kristen is trying to break Bleeding Gums Murphy’s anthem record.
This is Grate.
This is not a new layout guys.
Things really did get broken last night. Kinda badly from my understanding. Most plug ins/coding had to be scrapped for now.
Internet Dad hasn’t had time to reconstruct the commenting platform yet. But it’s temporary.
That’s what they said about Michael Jackson in 1988 and look what happened.
You have a point.
I’m on the drunk of being verge. Anything typed from here on in is not subject to the physics of law.
http://i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/495/119/e1f.png
*Cums*
/that’s my thing-don’t judge me
The site broked last night, and I know Dad had some problems. I don’t expect this design to last long.
Preview of the next layout…
Oh what the fuck we can’t even post images now?!?!
Just for now until Dad gets time to get things put back together.
^ What he said.
“Oof!”
-A dog that can’t pronounce ‘W’
“Maybe somebuddy can fix this?
-A Groat
This is Groet.
My mom said the Seahawks look like grasshoppers when they wear blue unis. Now i can’t unsee it.
Comments got flipped to bottom for Live Blogs?
Don’t seem to auto-refresh, either.
Hey Spur, did you get my reply msg re: Vegas?
Yes, thank you. I’ll give you a ring a couple days before.
Good deal.
I have no idea.
Honestly, this seems like the worst layout thus far.
I’m getting vertigo from this new layout.
Folks!
Lasso fan.
I went to the movies today for the first time in about 3 years. It was the new Blade Runner film. A couple of thoughts…
1) HOLY SHIT ARE MOVIES EXPENSIVE AS FUCK NOW! I do not get why anyone would go to the movies on a regular basis. It was like $35 for a single ticket, small popcorn, and a medium soda.
2) The film itself was fantastic, except the theater did not have their sound system set up right. So basically I could have had a better experience on my own set up, for a lot cheaper.
3) There were only three other people to see the flick, which considering it was a Thursday afternoon, I don’t think is all that surprising. I doubt I was the only person not in retirement.
That said, reading up on the box office returns on the flick, its been a major money loss for the studio which is especially depressing considering the previews for the film which consisted of the following:
Another retarded Pacific Rim film that will do insane returns in the Chinese markets because the films are stupid and easy to dub.
A remake for Death Wish by Eli Roth, starring Bruce Willis. Someone please make an argument as to why this film needs to happen.
Yet another Liam Neeson revenge, brutal action movie (I refuse to believe that “The Commuter” will have anything in it to distinguish it from the “Liam Neeson’s family gets murder-raped: the Series” franchise.
Another Disney-Pixar movie that looks depressingly like the same thing.
And another revenge-murder action film that left such an impression that I cannot tell you the name or who is acting in it.
Oh and another Star Wars film that is certain to be utterly stupid and make insane money…Star Wars is the equivalent of cinematic Oxycontin at this point.
I’ve never been one to believe in the argument that US society is sick or something but I swear to god, it seems like every fucking film coming out now involves incredibly stupid revenge-murder spree shit, which I cannot help but think that this is why Americans are both remarkable stupid and we have a constant rate of mass shootings.
I’m getting old and bitter. I used to love movies, especially when I first got into the military and I was on a rotating training shift. So I would end up like once every two weeks where I had to stay up for 30 hours straight to flip my sleep…so i would just go to a movie theater all evening long. Its just staggering how bad films have gotten.
I don’t get how a single movie theater stays open other than the ones that specialize in art films.
Why is Leave a Reply at bottom of page now instead of top? And prompt no longer says “Make Some More Dick Jokes?” I’m new here, but I still hate change because I’m getting old….
He hates change! He’s one of us!
Things got interesting last night and things got brokeded.
Totally not my fault no matter what anyone says, fwiw. I never gave Ukrainian call girls my password.
one of us! one of us!
The news about Roy Moore should remind us of former House Speaker Dennis Hastert who would only be condemning Moore because Moore preferred girls.
That reminds me of what my ex-wife said when I asked her if she had heard about these shenanigans – “I was only surprised it wasn’t a 14-year old boy.”
Tough but fair.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZgIrXKpv2gw
Yay foar embedding tho.
How is embedding done in this new world? i see the https trick doesnt work anymore
Images won’t embed for now until the house gets fixed.
Youtube will tho.
This is Groat.
No, you’re a goat.
[scours the fantasy football waiver wire to find some reason, ANY reason to care about this game]
Hooboy! Today’s news theme seems to be gross sexual advances.
That elected officials in Alabama will compare to teh Bible.
Oh come on Pitt!!! FFS!!!!!!
Thought about betting on the Holes b/c FML, but the line moved from 10 to 9 before I could get my money in, and I were annoyed.
Your head would have exploded if you’d bet on them.
And just the fact that you thought about doing so proves my point.
“This? This is great.”
-Herodotus450
Working the overnight shift again. For some reason, there is a racquetball in here. I know what I’m doing for the next 11 hours:
(please be sexy women of raquetball. please be sexy women of raquetball. please be sexy women of raquetball.)
Oh. That’s… something.
“Didn’t see a raquet anywhere. You ain’t fresh at all!”
-Rotten Tomatoes
Hippo has $512 on the Seatruthers. $500 because I need to get back to evens stevens, $12 FOAR the 12s,, smgdh
If’n they fuck me, I am sending the Charmslinger’s thumbs to the ppls at BetDSI.eu
Hey, I only bet TWO hockey games all week.
I know fuckall re hockey, so naturally I went 1-1 and am like +$13 on those bets. Quitting that confusing sport whilst ahead. Like the $5 I took from the schoolchildren of Illinois via their lotto
I wish the like thingy was functional just because I hate Illinois schoolchildren.
Fuck those little shitheads.
If the Seatruthers fuck you right, your legs will be wobbly, no doubt.
Can this work week just fuck off already? I want to get to the weekend, so I can stress more about my Best Man duties. But at least then, I can drink while doing it.
Fuck, I need a beer.
This is Great
/notices that his 15 year-old has had his girlie gnawing on his neck
[sends text] “Oh Hickey, you’re so fine. You’re so fine you blow my mind. HEY HICKEY! HEY HICKEY!”
This is Great
You had me at “North Carolina (1-8)”.
You complete me.
I wish I knew how to computerize like you. Nicely done.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=StZcUAPRRac
“Here comes the Sonne?”
-The Beatles, asked to do the intro
This is Great.
[wishes he could ‘like’ Hero’s ‘like’]
I know, one feels naked in here.
/liek a 14-year old in Roy Moore’s chambers, , amirite??
“Leaked”