I don’t get hung over very much anymore but when you go thru the stress of an Eggpocalypse, the usual college footballing and a Cuse/Kansas game, sometimes the excessive imbibing catches up to you. No matter, today is a new day and somebody has to get back on that horse and it might as well be yours truly. TO THE GAMES!
CLE/LAC: The Chargers O is on fire right now but Josh Gordon is back. Finally! I wonder what took him so long. Oh, right. Wr Allen is averaging a stunning 165 yards over his last two and I can’t see him being stopped by them Browns. The LawnClippers are actually the only team that Cleveland has beaten in the last two years but lightning won’t be striking twice today.
NYG/OAK: Try to hold down your dinner if you’re watching this travesty. Both Crabtree and Cooper are out again and the Giants haven’t been able to cover the tight end spot for a few years now. What does this mean to you? Well, if you’re waffling about inserting Jared Cook into your fantasy lineup just go ahead and move on to something else. Will the Geno Smith Era last all of the rest of the season? The smart money is pushing people out of the way in order to get to the betting window and put all its money on the under. Btw, sources tell ESPN that McAdoo is gone within 24 hours of this upcoming loss.
CAR/NO: Two 8-3 teams have at it for the NFC South lead. Congrats to you if you drafted Kamara Chameleon back in the fall. He comes and goes up and down the field. He comes and goes. You may want to strain your shoulder giving yourself a pat on the back for that one. You see, you’re old-you can’t be doing that sort of thing at your age.
LAR/ARI: Third string qb Gabby Gabbert gets another start for the Cards who have been devastated by the ouchie bug. He’ll be throwing to the likes of Ricky Seals-Jones, Chad Williams and Carlton Agudosi. Who? After halting the Saints 8 gamewin streak, the Rams just might be onto something. Qb Goff is gulping some rarified air these days. Over his last 4 games his TD/INT numbers are 9-1. Notbad for a feller that was written off last year.
Get at ‘er!
Throw it to Kupp
Dilly Dilly!
Think of it as human beer pong.
MOTHERFUCKER!!!!
that was a cheap shot on Cam. it wasn’t much before if was not necessary.
GURLEY should not be wasted as a blocker goddamnit
THROW to GURLEY
Geno Smith is in quite a few ways the Ben McAdoo of QBs. He’s a shitty, incompetent QB that players and fans want to dump into the ocean.
c’mon, Baby Buster!!
Greg the leg!
Nooooooiiiicccceeee INT RAMS!
Now goff throw it to yur boy Kuppp
RAMMIT
“Him”, of course, being a line of cocaine.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_vRysBZk6iQ
if Goff could toss 2+ TDs to Gurley that wud be nice
Eli hopes after this game he can still tour Alcatraz before it gets dark. He wants to avoid those ghosts.
Raiders smelling blood against smith & the Giants
I think Giants players are smelling McAdoo’s blood in the water and are going to lay down today.
I don’t think that there is a line high enough that I would not have taken Oakland and the points in this game.
eh, I have Gurley and Baby Buster, but fading Zeuerlein. That hurt. And was expected.
I get what I deserve for the Tyreek thing. Unless Antonio Brown is a late scratch (he has no subs available), am ded meat for sure.
GREG THE LEG!!!
Which Giants player takes a swing at McAdoo 1st?
Yes
Rams kicker gets it from 56 yds. out. Suck it, Novak!
Cam needs to ball out. No INTs please
Marshon Lynch going off!!!! Yea babay!!!
ok, longshot Giants moneyline doesn’t look so good. Won’t get 8-for-8. Come on, #ThePauls and Iggles!
Cooper! Cooper!
Oh shit FG try by chargers bounces off the side upright. Hahahahaha!
MarshawnDown!
Did Eli remember to bring his SI and Motertrend magazines?
You mean Highlights.
he’s grown up now.
Those aren’t pop-up books!
Please Please ScamNewton don’t make me regret sitting you for Carson Wentz
Officially 5-for-5 in early game NFL betting, incuding 2 moneyline bets (Minny and Miami). Feel SMRT except for the whole Tyreek on fantasy bench. I guess at least Mike Wallace and Kearse were on my opponent’s bench, but almost nobody started them.
I am too stupid to live.
Down to my last beer. I’ve still got a bottle of scotch but I pride myself on logistics. I’ve failed me.
Bwhahahaha the Chargers are now, 0-14 for scoring on an opening drive.
Fuck u spanos!
Found it! Guy who get the flag from the Chiefs vs Jets game that Peters threw
HT ChristmasApe
That fan will be banned for life by the NFL for stealing league property.
Donkity-Boo for LawnClippers kicker.
Boltman is angry
AFC WEST standing got me feeling like….\
I’m not surprised that Kelce and Smith weren’t on the same page, because while Kelce is undoubtedly a great TE I am far from convinced that he can actually read.
Oakland and Bolts can make their move now. KC is dead, they should have started Mahomes.
Wait, Andy Reid has no time-outs left at a crucial point in the game?
Hang on, gotta go find where I left my shocked face…
No, that’s not it; mine’s much paler.
PFT says: Crazy how rite before the buffalo fan threw the dildo Tony romo perdicted the Bills were about 2 fuck themselves
Hahaha someone threw a dildo on the field at the Bills vs Pats game
Again!
Some moarTyreek Hill action would be great
Oh shiitittitit u called it!
#HippoSeppuku
Frank Gore climbed to 5th place in rushing all-time. Not too bad for a guy with two reconstructed knees.
How soon before a team celebrates a touchdown by pretending to do an extra point kick?
That is excellent.
This motherfucker right here got PAID for that Vikings win. Hell yes.
Viva Las Vegas!!
If alex smith wants to win this gonna need to throw it to Kelce.
Just throwing it more than 5 yards down the field would be a start.
Gonna go roll a doobie and smoke it for Gordon! Feelin good
Happy he is back
Let’s see if history completely repeats itself and the Chargers somehow lose to my Clowns…
“Oh baby, now you’re talking my language.”
-Freddy Nietzsche, author of The Eternal Return
If the Chiefs can’t win they are taking the ball, the flags, the goal posts, the chains, and anything else that isn’t nailed down, and they are going home.*
*Out for ribs.
RAMMIT good.
What the bananacake-I’m getting every 4 o’clock game!
Nice win for the Packers!!!
