Rain-Soaked JV NFL Afternoon Thread

The Noon window is filled with hot garbage, and deserves no preview.  Let us resume drying out with midday, shall we?

LSU at Auburn (3:30, CBS)

I am still not sure exactly who Aubie is just yet (that U-Dub win was hardly convincing), and today will be quite demonstrative.  10 points is a pretty big spread, though Jordan-Hare is muy dificil as far as road venues go.  Bayou Bengals catch a break that it’s not under the lights.

BYU at Wisconsin (3:30, ABC)

So.  Many.  White ppl.  I hope they bought sunscreen by the 5-gallon drum.

Boise State at Oklahoma State (3:30, ESPN)

Well, spank me ’till it hurts!  An entertaining cross-conference tilt where the first team to 50 just might win.  BDSM State stands between us all and an endless procession of does Boise belong in teh playoffs? windbaggery.

Duke at Baylor (3:30, FS1)

Not too much raping!!

Houston at Texas Tech (4:15, Fox)

JV Yoooooouston is feeling really good about itself, and that probably won’t work out so good for them.  Look for Guns Up!! to stand they ground.

Alabama at Ole Miss (7:00, ESPN)

A good litmus test as to exactly how scary Roll Damn Tide is gonna be this season.  Johnny Reb has been their Bogey Side since forever, and has enough pieces to cause trouble if Bama isn’t at peak performance level.  But that Reb defense?  Let’s just say it can be exploited a wee bit.

Ohio State at TCU (8:00, ABC)

Probably the match of the day, though I have a feeling it will disappoint.  Hope not.  Blood FOAR the Bloodeyes’ GOD, and all that.

Arizona State at San Diego State (10:30, CBSSN)

Co-ed Bowl 2: Electric Boogaloo features a ranked Sparky squadron.  Go ahead, enjoy, this shall be the only week anyone ever says that about Herm’s charges.

0 0 votes
Article Rating
King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
Subscribe
Notify of
293 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
scotchnaut

This is the single most insane college football game I’ve ever seen. I invite you to throw your faves against the internet wall.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VyjIGzh3Pgk

Spur

TD Potatoes!
Beautiful throw and catch.

Spur

comment image

theeWeeBabySeamus

Can’t see the line, can ya Russ?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

...

Folks, I’m going to San Diego for the first time tomorrow and the thing I look forward to most is having Pliny the Elder for the first time. I truly aspire to so little.

scotchnaut

Pliny The Younger is way more open-minded. Just sayin’.

Spur

this Blue vs Orange coloring is pleasing

scotchnaut

Bloated Candice Bergen Sighting!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Network ideas are as old as she is.

theeWeeBabySeamus

NC State just completed an 84 yard TD pass from Ryan Finley to Jakobi Meyers. He broke a tackle at the 4 yd line and then got to the goal line.

theeWeeBabySeamus

OK, I made that up.

LemonJello

Easy to do with no one else on the field. Campus police will be by soon to tell them to get back to the dorms.

theeWeeBabySeamus

STILL UNDEFEATEDZ!!!!!!!

ArmedandHammered

Is Papa John’s trying to make the most disgusting pizza in the world? Or are people who order that Italian Hero Pizza kept track of and are eventually removed from the gene pool for the betterment of mankind? Papa John’s our mission is eugenics.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

theeWeeBabySeamus

hehehehe

Spur

DOINK!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

theeWeeBabySeamus

That’s a shitload of wheelbarrow orangutans.

Spur

comment image

theeWeeBabySeamus

I like her a lot.

Spur

OK State knows Boise likes to throw the ball right?

Spur
scotchnaut

“She seems to satisfy all of my needs.”

-Abraham Maslow

...

Fun fact: Maslow lifted his entire hierarchy of needs from an Indian tribe (Blackfoot) and never credited them aside from making his chart teepee shaped.

scotchnaut

Pshaw! Next you’re gonna tell me that Ayn Rand ended up relying on social assistance!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Spur

he dead?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

If the wind blows at night he can’t be under blankets anymore.

Brick Meathook

. . . and when they unfurled it, he was gone.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Spur

Rypien needs to go to the right team. Jags, Denver, etc.

JustStopDude

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

scotchnaut

Mommy’s nipple fetish makes me sick. smgdh.

Spur

Oklahoma State fans are a little too much into their paddles

JustStopDude

They play in that junior college league right? Big teen12 or something?

JustStopDude

comment image

God I love the SEC…

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

litre_cola

Byu Wisco preview made me laugh. Great work Hippo!

Spur

comment image

theeWeeBabySeamus

I like her.
Him, I might have to kill.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

He looks like

“I’m getting called into HR for this aren’t I?”

theeWeeBabySeamus

Yeah, hipster couldn’t commit. She’s being polite with her reaction.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“Wait; this is on camera?!”

“Welp, sending my resume to the good printer.”

scotchnaut

Easy to tell that she’s been spanked much harder by better men with larger hands.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

theeWeeBabySeamus

OK, this gal doing the sign language translation for the governor’s office… Well she’s been overworked.

Also, deaf people do realize how to turn on closed captioning….yes?

Yes, I’m an asshole, this isn’t news….move along ppl.

Wakezilla

Closed captioning is shit tho

JustStopDude

SEC baby! Accept the evil!!!

Spur

Hail Satan!

theeWeeBabySeamus

She’s here with tWBS. I’ll tell her you said “hey gurl!!!!”

theeWeeBabySeamus

She says….ggghrf…not on my face.

/it totally went on her face

theeWeeBabySeamus

OK, even I’m ashamed of that one.

LemonJello

Delos Inc has her in the lab for a 50,000 mile tune-up.

comment image

JustStopDude

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

You can complain about your job, but the rigors of a photographer’s assistant……

scotchnaut

A large-breasted redhead with attitude? I’d love to be her ex-boyfriend.

litre_cola

Agreed!

Spur

Boise is on ESPN2

scotchnaut

You know, in the fairly-near future a bunch of us are going to pull up our adult diapers and say, “Back in my day, we didn’t trust streaming services at all! 90% of them were complete shit! Now they’re good? Really? They only had 15 years to get their shit together! Give me a feed from a trusty TV any day of the week!”

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

LemonJello

Your proctologist seems rather…aggressive? Intense?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

And that’s why I have an exam every week or so.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

They remade Alien at a doughnut shop.

Spur

comment image

theeWeeBabySeamus

Holy good god damned shit.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I can tell….she’d really like me.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hey look, NC governor is back on mah teevee. He’s not good at public speaking. Almost makes me miss that asshole McCrory.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

theeWeeBabySeamus

How much trouble will I get in if I go outside and jerk off in the wind and rain of the hurricane remnants.

/asking foar a friend

theeWeeBabySeamus

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

You’re fine; just don’t take a dump.

comment image

theeWeeBabySeamus

I’m not making any promises. Shit happens.
(heheheh…get it?)

Senor Weaselo

Remember, if you spit in the air, it lands on your face.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I shoot downwind. I learned that long ago.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Don’t invoke another fetish of his.

theeWeeBabySeamus

HEY YOU STAY OUTTA THIS!!!!!!

Spur

No one wants to see the end FSU-Syracuse. Change this shit ESPN.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

LemonJello

Have you tried logging out, then logging back in?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Spur

“..and they called it a crime?”

– Sandusky

scotchnaut

[hears “loud slapping sounds”]

LemonJello

Is this the Sandusky Inmate Players Theater production of Avengers: Infinity War?

Spur

Laundry is done. It aint Raining here.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

LemonJello

Last time she lets junior take her car out to Lovers’ Lane…

herodotus450

Trojans wrapping up the Corn has a different meaning where I come from
https://
i.ebayimg.com/images/g/6T8AAOSwFO5aBSzX/s-l300.jpg

scotchnaut

“Wake up Horatio? Not if I have anything to do with it!”

-Super Snailfish Brewery’s recent release of their seasonal “Intrepid Near-Fall Holocaust 90 Minute Coffee Porter”.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

scotchnaut

“Here is proof as to why face plants are so expensive to cook with.”

-Julia Child

scotchnaut

Nebraska/Troy is turning into a grain silo burner.

herodotus450

Unless Maryland scores 21 points in the next 50 seconds, they really are gonna lose to Temple. So by the transitive property, Temple is better than Texas.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

ArmedandHammered

Local channel is only doing hurricane coverage, no LSU – Auburn game, unless you go to their streaming site. Not going to happen.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Wakezilla

Iowa St.’s kicker’s last name is Assalley? Oh boy, he must have been teased a lot when he was young

scotchnaut

As Napolean so brilliantly put it, “I came. I saw. I firsted”.

scotchnaut

Edit: “I fisted.”

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

herodotus450

The fact that Stanford doesn’t just play Stamford every ween is the biggest travesty in the history of the universe.

scotchnaut

You gotta ween yourself off the hyperbole.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

scotchnaut

So glad you edited me out of that clip. Pushing that kid to the ground repeatedly? Best day ever!

ArmedandHammered

Go home son, you’re drunk.

1 2 3