We saw all these ‘soft tissue’ injuries coming, didn’t we? The rush to play combined with the lack of proper preparation led us here. Thing is, are there more injuries than a usual-season first week? I don’t have that answer but if someone comes up with it and the answer is ‘less’, The Shield shall crow it from the mountaintops.
TO THE GAMES!
Bills/Fins:
Buffalo’s Edmunds and Milano-two starting lbs, are out of commission and another backup is as well. Some guys from the practice squad have been engaged but look for heavy safety looks today. Miami’s secondary is looking good but the D as a whole only got 4 pressuses on Cam last week. That means good things for Allen if he can limit his tendency towards bone-headed turnovers.
Niners/Jets:
San Franny is all kinds of banged up but will it matter? Because you see, Adam Gase got his dream backfield of Gore/Ballage once again. Does the guy have Hypotoad capabilities? I’ve looked at all other options and this is the conclusion I’ve come to.
Broncs/Steelers:
Rb Conner is ready and raring to go after much teeth-gnashing by the fandom earlier in the week. Expect this cycle to repeat itself often this year. No worries though, Snell Jr filled in with a healthy 5.9 ypa and 2.89 yards after contact. That said, the Denver run D is a whole nother kettle of ponies.
Vikes/Colts:
You know what they say, “You can take the serial baby-maker out of LA but you can’t make him pass to his wr’s”. Of his 36 noodly appendage passes, 50% were to his rbs.
Jags/Titans:
Tennessee should roll as long as they can find Laviska Shenault. The ‘supposed’ wr played out wide, in the slot, at te, at rb and even had one down at qb. That’s interesting stuff.
Falcons/Cowboys:
Atlanta refused to address their lousy secondary during the offseason and paid the price yet again last week. They allowed the 8th most fantasy points to receivers but I think they can do even better vs. Cooper, Gallup and Lamb-maybe 2nd or 3rd most?
Rams/Eagles:
Philly’s glad to get Sanders back at back because Boston Scott got all of 35 yards on the ground last week. Fantasy deep-sleeper! Pshaw, I say.
Giants/Bears:
Call me a dumb Giants fan but I think Saquon flashes here. Y’all thinking, ‘but Bears D’ and I hear ya but they gave up almost 100 yards to AP and Swift would have had 4 catches and a TD if not for that egregious drop in the end zone last week. Bears sorta escaped that game.
Lions/Packers:
Rodgers had a 96 PFF grade last week, his highest in more than a decade. Did a trainer say something nice about his mom or something?
Panthers/Bucs:
This is Brady’s ‘get right’ game, right? But Godwin is out and Carolina looked functional last week. Don’t take the 9.5 spread but you may want to play Scotty Miller-he’s smallish but grabbed all 5 of his targets for 73 yards last week.
Go get ’em.
Josh Malone! The Great White Hope – Who Is Black.
Dallas rapidly becoming Pie-O-My. And Ralphie is coming with the gas can.
Probably gets great gas mileage.
<blockquote class=”twitter-tweet”><p lang=”en” dir=”ltr”>NFL Week 2 Injury Report<br><br>-Dead: Basically Everyone<br>-Dead Inside: Cowboys Fans<br>-On Life Support: The NFC East<br>-Barely Breathing: Your Fantasy Team<br>-Somehow Still Alive: Tom Brady<br>-Fully Healthy: Your Fantasy Opponent</p>— NOTSportsCenter (@NOTSportsCenter) <a href=”https://twitter.com/NOTSportsCenter/status/1307748478030938114?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw”>September 20, 2020</a></blockquote> https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js
The football gods required the player sacrifices today to get Buck in the Hall of Fame before Hansen. Much chortling
Hippo, should we call Lions rb Kerryon Johnson ‘Wayward Son’ from here on out? Long time listener, first time caller. I’ll hangup and listen to your response.
*Chris Berman cums*
“Carrie on johnson” also the reason I left my 6th wife heyoo
FUCK
coo-coo-ka-choo Jimmy Robinson…
Canton holds a place for you….woo woo wooo
I wish the sound they add for the crowd was more realistic. The lack of “boo”s from the Jets home game just seems so fake.
80s laugh track would work here.
Pish
Nods in agreement.
https://images.app.goo.gl/jN1estyVWfJom9cT8
More like NO-Alie Cox, AMIRITE?
u rite!
FYTB!!!!
Never nice to root for injuries. Unless the last name is Bosa
Shit, now we even get a ded Hooker….
No worries Jim Irsay knows how to handle it.
Might get more McVay face today
Wuzzat Rice 3rd down run vs SD 3 & 29?
Fuck, why didn’t anyone tell me that the NFL is doing a tribute to the Battle Of The Somme with all these casualties?!
Jersey’s teams are behind a combined 38-3.
*41-3 at the half
In losers pool I did Giants last week and Jets this week. Easy peasy choices.
but now they used up!
and Mostert is out.
I dijon see that happening.
Maybe he’s just gassed.
oh, that’s GOOD
MAXIMUM JEST
Holy shit…I just got a phone call from a 669 area code, telling me to get get into my pads.
almost NICE
“9.9”
-Russian judge
Would like to apologize for insinuating that the Cowboys could defend against Matt Ryan
Fare Thee Well, Janeane
Jimmy G died?
yea
Nick Mullins gotta make it go
The Cum Town guy?
If in the U.K. it would create a chutney.
coma might be imminent, better set my Week 3 lineups
It’s good to have friends
Is Julio Jones at the rippers for some of them NBA wings????
Checking in on the Vikes game at the half…Ah, yes.Of course.
Capppppptaaaaainnnnnn Dingleberry! AHOY!!!
I have a colUmn to write, or my fat ass would be playing Footy Manager
come on Melvin gordon III
run da ball to get the pts
Jonathan Taylor Thomas is killing me
KITTY!!!!!
Lions thought they could go 90 yards in 90 seconds, almost gave up a safety and just gifted Rodgers a short field for a touchdown
How the fuck are the cowboys this bad?
BlueBunny, Cap’n
-Wyatt Earp, ruminating
BINGO!!!
Karma
All that nonsense and Eagles only down 5 at the half.
Joe Haden!
Matt Patricia putting on a masterclass on how to lose to Aaron Rodgers
Not just Aaron Rodgers!
No one loves Cal Ridley more than I do. Has no one figured out that he’s a wr1 that never, ever gets double coverage because Julio is on the other side? He’s played 31 games and has 21 TD’s so far.
Fantasy Stud Ryan Tannenhill
Are they allowing open carry on the field in tennessee
Cupp derp!
Kupp! Whatever
Donks try 58-yarder at Heinz Field. We’re just a little desperate, it’s still good! It’s still good!!
Wow we got an actual “Graham Gano…Ga-no good” out of the announcers
Gnu news
Congrats to anyone who started Jordan Reed, TD 2 on the books
Anyone allowing Jordan Reed to still play football should be tried at the Hague
To be fair Jordan Reed has no idea he’s playing football right now
Has any team ever fallen for Aaron Rodgers 4th down hard count?
Bengals, probably.
Falcons almost at super bowl levels of halftime lead
Falcons go for two, just because they can?
Always good to get in some extra goalline practice?
Joe Judge Ito