Look, it was about time they got a break and besides, as a literary genre it is a bit self-limiting, don’t cha think? Also, it’s Thanksgiving and we are supposed to think about the less fortunate. Or was that Arbour Day? I get things mixed up here and there. Fear not, we’ll have some ‘psychopath on hobo action’ soon enough but for now we’ll have to content ourselves with the last game of the night on offer.
TO THE GAME!
Vikes/Seahawks:
-Give Brian Shottenheimer some credit for adjusting the Seahawks offensive identity. That ‘we will run you into the ground’ mentality was wearing a bit thin and became increasingly easy to game plan for. (it also made my ‘no-brainer’ Chris Carson pick-you know he’s going to get all kinds of touches if he’s healthy-look a bit sillier than I’d thought).
-Yeah, the team that ran the 9th-most run plays last year has now dropped all the way to 22nd.
-Vastly under-appreciated qb Wilson took the task to heart and has responded with a performance through the first quarter of the season that not many saw coming. Will he cook for Zeke? The question remains unanswered.
-Speaking of qb’s, what’s up with Kirkie? His PFF passing grade thru the first three quarters of each game is 66.5 but then he revs it up to 87.1 in the fourth. It’s attributed to the team having to play catchup but there’s something else going on as well.
-That thing is that he leads the league in average depth of target at 12.1, meaning he makes his longer strikes count but they come in the last 12 minutes of the game. Maybe do something earlier, guy who draws up the plays?
Do what you do best, just try to not get it on your monitor.
Huge crowds in LA because the Lakers won. Exactly the wrong thing to do, but not unexpected.
“But it’s outside”
They can make the playoffs with that backup.
Andy Dalton is the best quarterback in the NFC Least.
Sad but true.
This may very well be true.
You know what I like about FOOBAWL? I’m a Star Wars nerd, a Legend of Zelda geek, an ancient Egyptian freak. I’m also a Yinzer, and I can sit and enjoy some drinks and games with the likes of yinz.
I fucking love it.
Yes, it is similar (with different NEEERRRRRRDDDD hobbies) for me – one of the few points of commonality I have with the quasi-normals. FITBAW IS FAMILY
Cam already played for one crazy fucking Southern racist shitheel.
*missed most of today’s games*
*looks at scores*
Are the Raiders… good? Or did the Chiefs just lay a steaming turd?
Turd
Ah, good. I don’t think I’m ready for a world where the Raiders are good again.
As long as he isn’t desperate enough to sign with another NFC East team I think he’ll be A-ok
I’m not sure it would be desperation so much as spite, for which I would not blame him.
Back to the maths – kicking the FG ain’t 100% either, especially in the rain. You could get it blocked, have a bad snap. Then, maybe you lose the extreme field position advantage.
Laces out
No way. You’re just rationalizing it now.
I harbor no ill will towards either team and don’t care who won, but must say that MIN really shot themselves in the dick.
Seattle should’ve lost by at least 14.
It’s the best way for Dingleberry to lose. I LIKE THAT!
“I’m wet. I’m tired. It’s over.” The ref.
“I’m taking my ball and going home”
Debatable replay call, but there was no chance Capt. Kirk was doing anything with another 5 seconds.
That’s where you’re wrong. He’d throw an interception.
possibly fumble the snap
Both of you make excellent points. I concede my error, yield the floor, and turn my full attention to this full beer that has mysteriously appeared before me.
BLACK JEEBUS >>> WHITE JEEBUS, I guess
Jeesus died for somebody’s sins, but not mine…”
—Patti Smith
Most annoying thing, now every idiot will question the decision not to kick the FG. Also, small unsupervised children are running amok in the courtyard of my apartment building.
A small “risk” to go from 94% to 100% is a no-brainer, when your “floor” is 85%
Boil some water.
Their parents are on Facebook, so really this is your own fault.
Referee tired of the rain.
TOUCHDOWN SEAHAWKS
HOME COOKING
how empty is thine hand, Dingleberry??
Yes, give us a nice 5-minute VAR now.
SeaTruthers have to not shit their pants for one, maybe two defensive plays still.
Crazy bananas
I think that TD just broke Drew.
His brain did that two years ago.
You got a point.
cue the music
https://twitter.com/CableThanos_/status/1315493368491720706
Holy shit, same guy dropped the bunny…then made THAT grab.
DK Metcalf is an absolute beast, and I cannot believe he fell to the 2nd round.
Ran a bad combine. Word was he couldn’t cut
The combine is so over-rated. Ask Mike Mamula.
THIS CHAAAAARRRRRMING MAAAAANNNNN!!!
There it is.
they should have run it on 3rd down
How was there no challenge on that non-TD?
I would have run it on 3rd down. Chaos is your friend.
That and Carson had a 29-yard TD run through the entire Minny defense earlier.
DK fingers
OH MY GOD WE HAVE ANOTHER ‘TOUCHDOWN SEAHAWKS!’ MOMENT HERE!!!
Touchdown Seahawks
That’s definitely a TD
So bad that SEA had to start worrying about leaving too much time on the clock
This is some ridiculous defensing. Poor yeah right.
OK, you can work middle of the pitch NOW
Me: I cannot get enough of watching Wilson fuck up. Sanctimonious prick.
/Wilson converts a 4th and 10 to Metcalf
Me: Ah. Well. Nevertheless.
I have no idea what’s happening here, but, I wouldn’t mind being there.
I think that may be an off-brand Dancing Bear, for one thing.
here ya go…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8NuagM0TUQ
I am disappoint no safety
We lost a “two safety” game thanks to JV VAR last night. Cowbells would have finished with 4 points total instead of 2.
A “two-safety game” is what I called it when I put on two condoms before sexing a beautiful yet questionable woman I had picked up in college.
Just kidding. It’s when I use two socks to masturbate so as not to leave a mess. I’m so lonely.
Well, that was interesting.
Even if you miss the 4th down play, you give them the ball at the 5. That is more of a maths benefit than going up 8.
/plus I REALLY DON’T WANT TO SIT THROUGH OT
Minny came to play tonight…
That makes one of them
Oh, that reminds me. I wanted to make some Quotables gifs when I was sans laptop.
Oh, looks like that sneaky professor Jesus has dropped another pop quiz on dealing with adversity on ol’ Russ!
Dude …
Charmpick
Feel terrible about Dak, but I do note that he’s made $33 million over the last two years, which is considerably more than I’ve made as an attorney over the last 25+, so he should be OK.
Still, (and this, much like a moderately-priced Malbec*, goes well wit everything), fuck Jerry Jones.
*Maybe. I don’t know. I know fuck-all about wine.
I hope he saved/invested wisely, or at all.