I just jinxed it, didn’t I? You can blame me after the game when you look at Hopkins’ 3 catches, 45 yards stat line. The game does look promising and there a number of quality tilts on offer this weekend. (unlike the first two “Point and Laugh” games featured on Thanksgiving)
Newsy Notes:
-The Giants have an new offensive line coach! They’d been slowly improving and a New York-centric podcast had noted that Judge had been spending quite a bit of time with the unit. He’d also gone ahead and hired a consultant by name of Dave DeGlugielmo to help Marc Colombo along. I guess when the latter heard the news there was a ‘wordy kerfuffle’ and someone lost their job. I think it has been very well established that questioning Judge’s judgement is verboten these days so, so long.
–Bruce Arians, when questioned about our fave nutball wr said to the reporters gathered, “He’s a model citizen-everyone here has gotten angry at some time. If you haven’t, I invite you to cast the first bike.”
-The Raiders now have 11 players on their Covid list. Wasn’t The Grinder fined some shekels a while ago for not following protocols? Weird how these things happen.
TO THE GAME!
Cards/Seahawks:
-Carson is out but Hyde be in. Perhaps some semblance of a running game might halt Seattle’s “lost 3 of the last 4” slide.
-The twice-baked failure pie that is the Seahawks D didn’t have a sack or even a hit on Murray the last time they interacted. They give up around 57.1 fantasy points each week to opposing wr’s, a number that is 11 points more than the next-worst team. So… “Play ‘Em All!”
-Much like some of the models Unsurprised likes to post, this NFC West division is very top-heavy. The Rams D and offensive line has really gelled the last few weeks and the Cards still have to play them twice. If Seattle wins this one they get a Fluffer’s Row of Philly, both NY teams and Team and they should be looking pretty.
-Are you kinda disappointed in Drake/Edmonds production? Well, Arizonny has 15 TD’s on the ground so far and the Kyler kid has 10 of them. Ball hogger. Can’t do that in baseball, buddy.
-Reminder, last time around Lockett went bananas-200 yds and 3 TD’s. DK was not OK because PP shadowed him and he ended up with 23 yards gained.
-Is Wilson forcing it too much? The most interceptions he’s had in a year was 11 and he’s at 10 already.
Type as though you’re staving off boredom.
/Hey, there’s a Tulane/Tulsa game on at 7:30 if you can’t wait for footed ball
Ha ha I make cartoons for a living.
The biggest difference I see between Murray 2020 and Wilson 2013 is Wilson was dropping dimes on scramble plays. Murray seems capable but isn’t executing as much.
I’ve run the numbers and Erin Andrews complains about her Starbucks Frappuccino order 56% of the time. That percentage increases by 6% on the weekends.
Figures that the one week there’s an actually compelling Thursday night matchup is the same week I get stuck working late. How was the first half?
Compelling
Didn’t miss much.
Tough call but its the new NFL
Only reason I am rooting for the Cards is that an old shipmate I’m still in touch with is a real Trumper as well as a SeaCocks fan. Suffer, Vinci!
Some of us are not Trumpers
Understood, it’s just him, not you; all the liberals in the death radius of my rooting for the Cards are just collateral damage. Nothing personal….
Do what ya gotta do
I am sure that who I do and don’t pull for in any matchup has anything to do with the actual outcome.
Zona acting like theres a full crowd
Cue 87 seconds of Ed Hochuli explanation
Ohyou.jpg
Counterpoint: What do you think, watery bucket of murdered dogs?
Is that Michael Vick? Good Lord he’s terrible.
Mike Vick being promoted seems like PETA trolling
He should be tied to a rape stand and pegged with a cattle prod.
Or have his courting tackle chewed off by an angry/hungry Staffordshire terrier.
That too! We had season tickets the first couple of years he played in Atlant, but he is dead to me now. I see no reason to rehabilitate the reputation of an animal abuser like him, but nothing the NFL does surprises me anymore.
Wow I heard like 10 seconds of that Fox News commercial and my brain just convulsed from the sudden shock dose of stupidity.
Can I interest you in some Pierre Poilievre from up here?
I’m Canadian. I’m well-aware of idiotic Conservatives copying, first, the Tea-Party and now the Trumpers. Like the idiot 19-year old Oosterbeck that the Ontario PCs trotted out to bitch about green energy prices, who then admitted to the press that he still lived with his parents and had never even seen a hydro bill in his life. (Which is why conservatives don’t take questions from the press.)
Still. That was like a direct injection of unadulterated conservative idiocy directly into my brain. I don’t have any kinda acquired tolerance against that shit! Nobody – thank god – watched Sun TV!
Sun media up here does that to my brain.
I’m gonna… look for a way to watch this game without the Fox commercials. The Fox Patriots or whatever channel they keep promoting keeps making me imagine some fat bearded dude sunken into an old couch in a dark trailer just jerking off into an American flag.
Amazon prime.
I got so many “Q” s on my fantasy football team, I’m on some fucked up mailing lists now.
But you know where the good pizza places are right? Isn’t that part of the deal?
Avoid the ones with the basements. The sexy sexy basements.
Tulane and Tulsa time!
First half so far
lookin like he cookin
Needs MOAR Metcalf plz.
Points left on the field
Hail Blerrrgh
Looks like these teams are both going to return to form tonight.
I like the penalties that basically say “you can’t possibly have covered that guy unless you cheated”
Laundry day
Can you do mine? I just had to dip into my wildfire go bag for boxers.
LOL Truth
“We can’t afford to pay people to stay at home”
Yes you can. just change the numbers in the computer it’s fine
OANN is so in the stages of grief, it’s almost sad in a way. On the other hand, fuck these piss bags with a rusty razor.
Are you actually able to watch any of that?
It’s hilarious! The commercials they air are on some kind of different level.
I don’t know. I might end up smoking my .45 if I had to expose myself to that for long. I guess I would have found all this shit funny if I was in my 20s, like I was when Reagan was “in charge.” Now as an old I find this shit frightening.
Nice tackling Zona
NICE TACKLING RONA
Can’t false start if you snap on set, i guess
GET THE BALL TO DK
Big if true
I benched RB Chase Edmounds this week
really hoping I don’t regret that….
Kyler playing more like a Kayden right now.
KJ > Kyler
Those jerseys were fantastic. Way better than the next ones they had.
Really enjoyable player, really shit human being.
Terrible mayor too
The patsy that helped keep Seattle from buying back into the NBA.
I really do like Patrick Mahomes, and, A.A. Ron is… okay. These State Farm commercials make me to see a rabid wolverine chew their necks out.
Troy and Buck are whores that can’t afford to criticize their most lucrative client.
You try criticizing with your mouth full of balls
“I did from 2008-2016”
-Lady G
Graham, not Gaga
Gaga ain’t no stranger to a cock in her mouth.
You say that like it’s a bad thing
Fair caught with 10 yards of space
This chick is far too high maintenance. He buys her a GMC and I bet she still cheats on him with the pool boy.
Can confirm.
I’m the pool boy.
Oh, he watches. No doubt about it.
Falwell Jr. is that you?
I don’t think there’s anyone on this site that was alive when that was the case.
I could never understand why my Boston-born (1916) grandfather was a fan of the Atlanta Braves. Turns out he was a Boston Braves fan from childhood, and stayed with them thru their moves to Milwaukee and then Atlanta.
That looks like a nice stadium. Maybe I can go inside it some day
When we’re rounded up as food for the lizard people, you’ll get your chance.
Chilean National Stadium, 1973
Thought it was Veterans Stadium Philadelphia
That’s coming soon.
Just once, I’d like to see these commercials depicting fans eagerly watching a game end with them losing their minds and tearing up the house because their team just lost.
The Dallas guy baseball batting his TV
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ixxeaGJDvj8
Good start, but I mean darker Fist fights, blood, someone’s head getting run into the television
Russell Wilson to Malcolm Butler, SB XLIX. I remember seeing a couple of pretty violent reactions on the Youtube.
Darrell Bevell was convinced it was the right call.
As a P*ts fan, so was I.
The Racine Ave Cardinals were the result of the Chicago Maroon faded used jerseys.
I can’t rec enough Humpty Dumpty’s Cheesy Party Mix-pretzels, resignation, cheese puffs, ennui, ringolos, tortilla chips, despair… It’s the whole package.
Man Canada gets all the good snack flavors.
Nah we import those from the US.
Okay. Kyler Murray is starting to grow on me.
That’s just MRSA.
He’s in the desert, it’s hantavirus.
FACT CHECK: Mostly true
Now it’s December 18 release. I hope I am still alive.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CJI6RyEDbG0
Love the Who music.
The other day, my oldest son burst into tears and said, “I feel shitty that I have a job and you don’t, dad.”
I’m going to shoot my boss in the fucking face with a bazooka.
Nice knowing you guys
If I may, could there be a tragic rock crusher accident? It would hurt more.
I like it, plus renting a rock crusher is way cheaper.
Your Second Amendment rights will prevent you from conviction, if you use the bazooka.
I like the hair dryer in the bathtub “accident” myself, but I am old skool.
(most people without hair don’t own hair dryers)
That makes it even funnier!
Radio. Everyone likes to listen to the radio.
Just gonna leave this here: https://www.reddit.com/r/todayilearned/comments/jx1rab/til_cia_revealed_a_heart_attack_gun_in_1975_a/
The CIA icicle game was so much stronger in the 70s
“It/s okay, son…I still get to rawdog your mom.”
You always find the silver lining
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N7vCww3j2-w
I don’t know what to make out of this packaging:
I wonder what it smells like, sexual frustration and dirty gym socks.
Dry Humping.
Oh I think you know EXACTLY what to make out of that.
Looks like me, when I really have to take a piss.
Doink
Proof
https://people.com/style/ciara-and-russell-wilson-launch-collaborative-perfume-the-rc-fragrance-duo/
Hey, which drug dealer is the 8 ball patch on the Cardinals jersey for?
Heisenberg?
New Mexico folks are usually Dallas Cowboy fans.
Maybe
charmslinger was a virgin till he married Ciara, correct?
No, just a Ciara-virgin. Unlike Future.
False. He was previously married.
Then Golden Tate had his way with her.
which was really awful financial planning on her part
Nah, he had him a cave bitch first wife
The Darrell Bevell memorial Bubble Screen
No, those were never successful and usually 3rd and 12
Charlie how the fuck ya been.
Life’s fine in a lockdown world. Finally able to enjoy a live thread.
So glad you chimed in.
Russell Wilson and his wife debuted a perfume the other day.
Wow, that definitely puts a bow on 2020
How long did they wait to open up their nostrils?
“It’s about respecting the sanctity of the scent”
THis old man has two tears in his miniscus. surgery on december 7. bring those pain killers on, baby.
Opiates is the gift that keeps on giving all Xmas season!
A day that will live in infamy!
If his surgeon’s Japanese, I hope he plunges the scalpel while making the dive-bomb noise.
I’m hiding a 50 caliber machine gun in my patella, that will show them.
We’ll be visiting your meniscus in an underwater memorial.
It isnt supposed to be aimed at your own knee though
Tora! Tora!Tora!
I believe that sound is the Hippo alarm.
If anyone ever deserved a nice opioid vacation
You can mix opiods and bourbon, right?
as long as they end in -profen NAE -din
I always did.