Sorry for the confusion: since the re-tooling of the site the people-powerful men and women, all of them-behind the scenes are still sorting through all the hamsters that operate the levers and cogs that make this place purr. It’s an arduous, hands-on process that involved a mass firing and then a re-interview process that’s taken quite some time. You can rest assured, a very insignificant number of gerbils have been molested to this point. [gives Balls the stinkeye] Moving on…
TO THE GAME!
Chiefs/Raiders:
-Andy Reid is coming off the bye so you know what that means… Yup, steakhouses in K.C. have had to take several items off their menus.
-Where’s Waller? Since week 5 he hasn’t had more than 50 yds or 6 grabs. If you do the fantasy thing that position has been unadulterated garbage. I’ve set expectations down to about 6 or 7 points, myself.
-The Raiders pulled off the upset a few weeks ago by flushing Mahomes from the pocket but preventing him from using his wheels. That resulted in him averaging just over 4 seconds to release the ball as he wandered behind the line of scrimmage looking for his wr’s. I’m not sure that Las Vegas can do that twice in one season. Nobody seems to talk about it but Patty is a student that puts the time in the film room and no doubt will be able to come up with a solution.
-Another facet of the game that caught the Chiefs off their guard was Carr going long a few times. He completed 2 30+ yard tosses that day-he threw only one all year in 2019. (remember that year? We were all so young and brave…)
-The Raiders haven’t allowed an rb to get more than 75 yds rushing since week 3. That might allow you to fade K.C.’s muddled backfield if you’re so inclined.
Welcome to the thread that is the night one. Type away.
I’m sure there is a perfectly rational explanation for this:
How do you feed your rats?
If I remember correctly, there’s a temple in India where rats are worshipped. I’m assuming this was taken there.
That makes perfect sense.
I’m kidding. That makes no sense at all.
I wonder if that Davis guy with the weird haircut is watching this game at the bar TV at the local PF Changs.
Looking up occasionally while really trying to color the menu between the lines this time.
I demand that she takes that headdress and beads off right now!
With that Wallerdown I’m beating Mrs. Sharkbait 124-84 this week. I may or may not be gloating a little bit.
Revenge from week 1
God Bless America:
“STOP THE FENCE! STOP THE FENCE! STOP THE….” (pflop) “OWWWW!!!! I’m suing.”
Al or Cris? Which one gave more to Ritterhouse’s bail fund?
Cris.
C. That shitty kid from Silver Spoons.
My Pillow guy.
We would also have accepted that answer.
Rick Schroeder. Just remembered Silver Spoons kid’s name.
Seriously, fuck Mike Brown with a rusty pitchfork. You draft a potential superstar, and surround him with an offensive constructed of five of these:
\
Even as a Yinzer, that was just awful. Really, sincerely sorry, Redshirt.
Agreed that it’s awful, and hope dude is okay, but this is the fate of waaay too many first round QBs. Maybe since I have this week off I’ll actually take a look, but it seems like the success rate for 1st round rookie QBs who start is lower than for other rounds/positions
How Aikman survived his first year is beyond me. But yes, teams that find themselves in a position to draft talent like Burrows usually aren’t teams with good foundations. Bengals might, (depending on the severity of the injury), have been better off sitting Burrows no matter what for the season and then using high picks next season on O-line help.
I think you’re 100% right. Granted, what happened to him is exceptionally bad (probably), but even if it’s not awful, look at people like Luck. He was reasonably successful, and might have been able to have a 10+ year career, but retired early because of injuries. Once the current crop retires, I don’t think we’ll see more QBs with careers into their late 30s unless they’re backups.
Especially with what they’re paid these days. You’d be out of your mind to take that kind of punishment beyond your first big contract.
Saw the replay. Doesn’t look good, but I did notice that the Team defender looked like he tried to hold Burrow up after his knee had bent in a really bad way, which was nice.
There are notable exceptions, but I think most guys don’t intend that sort of thing and feel awful when it happens. Always good to see humanity though
bleh
“AH! GOD, NO!” – Joe Burrow et al
“There are two powers in the world, the United States and the CIA.”
Okay, kinda get this, but why does she burst into flame right before being submerged?
Shes made of potassium?
Vodka
Its a lake of Holy Water?
So Cleveland
She’s a little gassy.
Woohoo! My mail order wine just arrived!
Coupled with the previous picture comment, I really really though that said wife.
I’m still a little sus.
Nah, I’m never getting married, although if I was gonna marry a chick it better be the sort with a dick
I’ve been a happy bachelor for most of my life, but as I enter my 60’s I realize my commitment to selfish enjoyability is going to come at a cost, which is getting old by myself. I’m still freaking out about this and don’t have an answer yet, but I would advise that if you can hook up with someone that you can tolerate, do everything you can to make that a thing. I am not looking forward to getting old alone, but I think that is what is going to happen to me.
I feel ya. I’ve always enjoyed living alone, but it’s not been great during the pandemic. I always traveled to see friends, and while I know a lot of people in the area, it’s not beyond acquaintances. So my ‘social bubble’ has been pretty much just me. I think I’ve had actual physical human contact with maybe 2 people since March. In normal times, it’s not hard to find communities, not so much nowadays, but shouldn’t be permanent.
Didn’t you get some yesterday too?
Was supposed to, never showed. that’s this order.
hey, -hic- judgy mcjudgerson, ease -hic- up there! -hic-
No judgement. Couldn’t remember who from yesterday said they was getting wine. May or May not have been due to my own inebriation
That’s progress for you. In 1976, that was a joke. In 2020, that is a picture of a lovely woman and whoever questions it is wrong in several different ways.
/ found a funny (while watching Cincinnati burn online)
Son: “Mom, I’m going to a sleepover at Kate.”
Mom: “Okay son, but don’t forget to wear protection.”
Son: “Mom, I’m 14.”
Mom: “And I’m 28.”
I’d disappoint her sooooo quickly
Horrible taste and No proof
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Its tastes like flop sweat and stale diet coke.
I’ll be sure to buy liquor from a teetotal.
Honestly 6 more Jacobspts and I can go to bed. I will smoke a bowl to make sure it happens.
I work for a SaaS company. If they tested us, We’d have like 7 full time employees.
Same. And when we did get tested they would warn us. Lol
There were still folks that failed the test
Also weed is now legal here, so makes it harder to say that you need the test
We (DoD) had an instruction come out saying that despite decriminalization by various states, we (govt employees) were still subject to screening and were forbidden to indulge no matter where we lived.
I work for the Dept of Defense and have never had a piss test. I think the last time I had one was when I worked for an environmental consultant about 25 years ago. We were mostly engaged in cleaning up Leaking Underground Storage tanks at Texaco and Exxon gas stations. Seemed a waste of time.
I’ve had a pee test twice for initial employment, but nothing since then. Far less popular now that stuff is legal so many places, and with the severe shortage of people qualified for tech positions
If they tested all of the workers in my company we would lose 50% of our staff easy, but then again weed is legal here.
Ryan Shazier is looking good.
He’s like the son Tony never had
Just hate it when people leave low-hanging fruit around like that.
Should we tell them that plane is upside down?
Royal Australian Air Force?
“Scratch my belly”
That will buff right out
Dramatic recreation of the latest [DFO] update
Gave him the State Farm rate on that one
Maxx Crosby looks like Brent Terhune
The actual LV defense is hanging out at Dick’s Last Resort at Excalibur, and the KC defense is eating BBQ in Missouri tonight. Apparently.
“Those sons-of-bitches better have leftovers”
-Andy Reid, laying rubber on the way out of the parking lot
Kneed sexy points from Mahomes——>Kelce or mommy puncher. Grumble grumble.
I don’t know why people are postponing weddings when they can do a perfectly good, socially distanced, webcast, drive-thru wedding in Vegas.
WEDDINGS AREN’T THAT FUN. EASILY 75% OF THEM SUCK. I’m fucking GLAD to have an excuse not to go to any weddings!
If it’s a webcast, no one knows if you don’t show up!
or if you’re wearing pants, if you do attend.
Guy I went to college with 35 years ago and has been my best friend over the years pressured me in to attending his third wedding (I’d also been best man at his second) in Vegas. I really didn’t want to go, and told him that as payback if I ever did get married I would have the ceremony held in Tierra del Fuego and he WOULD have to attend, as best man.
You shouldn’t even GET to invite folk to a 3rd wedding. Having a 2nd bite at the apple is bad enough.
A friend of mine’s ex is now on her 5th marriage. Upon hearing the news my daughter exclaimed “Wow, one more and she’s Thanos.”
I dated my haircut lady for a couple of years. She looked like Julie Christie. It took those couple of years for me to figure out that she had been married 5 times previously, and why.
However, 13 years on, she still cuts my hair.
To be clear, the second marriage was a re-affirmation of the first wedding, which he did in Denmark (he was in the Army in Germany and she was a German National). Funny thing was the re-affirmation was 20 years after their initial elopement, but within 5 years he was divorcing her and hanging with the Filipina mechanical engineer he ended up marrying on that third marriage ceremony.
Christ, I feel like I live in Appalachia.
First wedding, you give a present. Second wedding, you show up. Third wedding, expect a bribe.
I’d gladly still give someone a present, provided there is no implied social obligation to show up.
Hey, the Raiders’ punter is an NC State graduate!
If I manage to salvage this once-promising FF season it’s going to be because of Justin Herbert having continued success for the Chargers, and I’m not sure that’s a bargain I’m willing to make.
Figured I would try not to drink tonight. btl of wine and 3 beer late I am yelling at the tv for my fake football team.
That happens to me.
Every. Fucking. Night.
Not the yelling at the TV part, but the first part.
If you’re gonna pick a night not to drink, Sunday is not it. I’ve found Monday and Tuesday are the best.
That is because I get the sads those days!
Tuesday is easily the worst day of the week
Outside of FITBAW season, every day feels exactly the same now.
I have a late horseback lesson on Tuesday, so there’s no possibility of drink until at least 8 pm. If I just take a quick shower and read in bed I’m not motivated enough to grab a drink. It’s a good system.
Solid system right there.
I confine my drinking to the weekends and special occasions. The weekend is Fri-Sun.
Special occasions can be found Mon-Thurs.
I just tried block editor and think my brain is broken.
it’s just THE BLURST
“It’s a sin” was a clever bumper music choice!
NBC needs to show the real Vegas between commercials.
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where are all the stripper/courtesan fliers??
speaking of high-traffic carpet…
high-traffic carpet knee burns are the worst.
Dennis Hof. Just a total piece of shit.
One time in LV, I was sitting in the front seat of a cab and three of my chums were in the back, heading to some casino. I jokingly wondered if there were any titty bars in Las Vegas, and the Cambodian cab driver nearly shattered my patella opening the glove box to give me those fliers and discount coupons and shit. I guess he got a cut if I actually went, which I did not.
Ah, high traffic carpet and sadness, good stuff
Vegas can be fun, for about 72 hours. Then you need to GTFO
The binging and bonging and beeping on the casino floor can drive you mad. And I tire of the hookers trying to hit me up for action when I’m trying to play video poker at the bar at 3 AM.
I can say with considerable confidence that I have seen the last of LV in my life, except when I have to change planes at McCarran when I travel to Sacramento to check out the U-2s at Beale.
Vegas and Barcelona hold a special place in my heart as the two places I’ve ever been where guys are hassled more often than women
I can’t think of anything else that is common to both of the cities you mention. It’s like those cities are on different planets.
But if you go to the “right” part of town, you can get the sex worker harassment in just about any town on the planet.
TRUE HIPPO FACT! I am sufficiently repellent to have NEVAR been hit up by a sex worker.
So, never been to the Far East?
This is also true. I have spent 48 hrs in Vegas, though.
It’s location dependent. From what I know of you, you were probably spending a decent amount of time in the poker room, which is a sterile area for that shit
Funny story, back when the AC Trop had all it’s NL games in the annex area, I was playing 2/5 in the far corner, which had windows facing one of the lounge areas on one side. There was a bartop just under the window, and a young lady was sitting on the bartop, with her plumbers crack and the top of her bright pink thong with ‘slut’ in plastic gold letters strung along the waistband pressed up against the plexiglass right by my table. While I’m sure some of the old dudes at the table would’ve hit that, the conversation was uniformly humorous.
Funniest part of that story? That woman was Nancy Reagan.
Slut spelt backwards, after the A falls off, denotes a Tulsa fan.
This is also true. There and the sportsbook.
Its funny you mention McCarran. I’ve been to Vegas 3 times, and I’ve never flown OUT of McCarran. I’ve flown out of Henderson, and driven to LA twice.
Southwest does not offer non-stop service from San Antonio to Henderson.
They should show downtown Vegas, where it’s seedy enough that gambling feels like a sin.
Not so much anymore, downtown has a surprisingly good live music scene and is no more seedy than the modern day LES. Four Queens is….nice, and so are a couple of the other spots. If you want to feel really bad about gambling, Indiana is still the spot to hit.
Last time I was there, the old Strip (think Golden Nugget etc) had been turned into some kind of pedestrian mall with live music and zip lines. Felt like I was back in Anaheim for a 21st century version of Disneyland Main Street USA.
Yeah, that’s a reasonable description, but there are actually some pretty solid small club venues tucked into the disneyfication, and it’s still not as bad as the new Strip
Last time I Was in Vegas I went to a cool little speakeasy near old vegas with live piano music. I forget the name now and it’s going to bug the hell out of me
SO, DFO CON 2021 Not in Vegas?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Las_Vegas,_New_Mexico
I have a feeling we would ruin that town.
My stars! The glamour of it all!
Needz more people hurking up on sidewalks on the Strip.
Went gin. G&T. Rye will be had in the second half
Cheers!
Has either squadron even gotten to a 3rd down yet?
now that you mention it….
It’s like watching a BigXII game.
Know what I really hate? Fucking parades.
I had to march in parades in junior high when I was in the marching band. I fucking hated it and hate parades to this day.
See, now that Brady has left the P*ts, I could hang out with DIS GUY!
My dealer left me a voice mail asking if I was pulling for P*ts or pulling for Brady. Pretty stupid question to ask of a P*ts fan of 52 years. Every one in New England that can afford it ends up retiring to Florida.
I would love to retire to the Keys, but am fairly certain they’re going to be underwater by the time I can afford to retire, and quite possible well before that.
My parents retired there and they lasted five years. Monroe County is more polarized than the USA.
Agree, although they’re not quite as bad as organized runs. Organized runs are just parades with less style.
Long story, but I even managed to weasel out of the pass-in-review parade when my boot camp company graduated.
CEH looks awfully good tonight.
Horseshit PI call. Mahomes is going to be anointed as the new Brady.
I hope not, Mahomes seems legit likable off the field
There were tons of weak-assed PI calls this week. It’s a league-wide problem, not Mahomes-specific.
I think am done. Dallas won and no work tomorrow. Gonna sleep in
Yessss, ALL THE SLEEP
I can no longer sleep beyond 5 or 6 AM, even if I stay up till 2 AM. This really pisses me the fuck off.
Same here, but with like 7:30 as the cutoff time. I can/do nap, though.
#napnation.
Also can only sleep til 7 am
A good nap is WAY better than sex/
Why not both?
First one, then the other! Then the first one again!
Same wavelength Zymm.
Too expensive!
Starting to feel like a Friday night thread here….
Pretty sure I saw this women’s prison movie on cinemax in 1997.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EkGtuBX5nj0
Getting strange hot Jeff Goldblum vibes off this one.
Short list of least viscous liquids:
2. Tap water
1. Plastic packet soy sauce
1.5 Tap water with a small amount of dish soap mixed in
Evenin. 6 moar pts by Jacobs and I survive.
I did indeed use the emerg bowl on the balcony.
He can’t stop at 6, needs at least 3 more tuddies
Excellent planning
Shit, they already done cancelled the Apple Cup?
Gin or rye?
Rye
Gin makes you sin!
/so, gin OBVS
Straight or mixed? If mixed, what with?
Rye would be straight, gin either a g&t or a gin grayhound
ooh, that makes it harder, both sound solidly good
Gin
Gin.
Rye. But bourbon or single malt whiskey instead