Your “To Taysom Or Not To Taysom? That is the Question.” Sunday Afternoon Football Open Thread

We’re all a bit curious to see how things shake  out down Bourbon Street way, aren’t we? Stupid thoughts to follow…

TO THE GAME!

Eagles/Browns:

Is wr Reagor the next rook to break big? The last 2 weeks his target share has been 23% and 20% and the Browns have given up huge days to eight different wr’s so far this year. Of course, that’s dependant on competent qb play and you’re likely to see none of that here-Mayfield ranks 27th in passing grade, just ahead of Wentz at 28th.

Falcons/Saints:

It’s not really going to be Taysom is it? Football gossipists have spread the news that he was running with the 1st team during the week. How much though? Can he even read opposing defenses? He’s a gadget, one read guy that is 30 years old and has never started a game. Kudos to coach Payton for playing his qb’s so close to his chest but when I thinkify about it, it should be Winston out there. If the latter is out there he should go to Thomas long-he’s thought of as a chain-mover but his catch rate on deep passes last year was an insane 87.5%.

Bengals/Team:

One reason Burrow has been successful so far this year is that after fellow rook Higgins found his feet he’s now tied for 1st in passes caught over 15 yards and is third in contested passes caught with 13. The good news? Cincy has been fantastic at defending the run. The bad? That’s because it’s so easy to pass on them that other teams don’t bother with the ground game that much.

Lions/Panthers:

Who has been sitting on rb Swift all season waiting for him to break out? Moi, that’s who. That Wednesday news that he was suddenly on the injury list was kinda deflating, much like my chances of winning anything in fantasy this year. He’s joined on the bench by Golladay and Amendola and Stafford is banged up as well but will go.

Steelers/Jags:

As someone who is still in Hippo’s survivor money league, I can’t help but think that Pitt is overdue for a stunning, blowout loss. But it can’t happen this week vs the Jags and their wet behind the ears rook qb, can it? But then that would be the definition of stunning, wouldn’t it?

Titans/Ravens:

One of the reasons Baltimore’s passing game is struggling so badly is that the receiver that has the highest target share is frickin’ journeyman Willie Snead. You’ve got te Andrews and Marquise Brown to throw to and you opt for Snead the majority of the time? You brought this on yourself, Lamar. Maybe washed up Dez Bryant is the answer to those woes. [snorts]

Pats/Texans:

Maybe it was the weather, maybe it was Cam’s struggles in the passing game, maybe Bill just likes to run it? Whatever the reason, the Pats went to the ground option a whopping 67% of the time last week. And the Texans rank dead last in yards allowed per run play at 5.2. Speaking of lousy run D you may want to fire up Duke Johnson again despite the egg he laid last week-New England has over the last 4 weeks given up a half first down on every run play.

Do your thing. And I think there’s a inter-site Derby game this morning. Apologies for not getting this up earlier.

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Recovery Whiskey

Even by Flacco standards that pick 6 was elite

Doktor Zymm

The Eagles have a STONE COLD LOCK on the NFC East lead at 3-6-1

blaxabbath

I watch Tannehill with the TITS and, I’m afraid Adam Gase isn’t a good coach?

Recovery Whiskey

Lots of sad ravens

ArmedandHammered

Carr’s fav new band, The Unkindness of Sad Ravens.

King Hippo

el Tractorcito!

blaxabbath

On the BAL/TITS coin toss, the ref mentioned OT ends if there is a TD or safety on the opening possession “or if one team possesses the ball the entire quarter.” Does that mean it is a tie if you just hold the ball for 10 mins?

King Hippo

Think he just meant “that’s how you aren’t guaranteed at least one possession”

Redshirt

Its an unspoken flaw in OT. Theoretically, the first team can kick a field goal with 0:00 and the other team would lose even though the rules says they get a chance to respond.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Doesn’t sound like a flaw to me. Sounds awesome.

Redshirt

They should have did it as if you choose to get the ball first, you cannot punt on the drive.

blaxabbath

That would be awesome.

OT is all XFL rules.

blaxabbath

Makes sense considering Joe Burrows and Lordstown Automobile Factory Workers have about the same bleak future that is sustained only on the sad sad emotion known as ‘hope’.

https://twitter.com/JoeyB/status/1316112669401911299

blaxabbath

Will the Bengals no longer rely on the pass for every single play or what?

Redshirt

Their QBs are now Ryan Finley and Brandon Allen.

blaxabbath

So I’ll clear my FF team of all Bengals?

Redshirt

Keep the punter.

blaxabbath

I got Bernard, IR Mixon, and Higgins.

I guess Higgins can safely go.

blaxabbath

I’m sure there will be no shortage of defenders looking to kill him next year too.

blaxabbath

“Mike Vrabel. He’s a guy who knows how to use penalties to his advantage.”

Unlike all those coaches who…wait. Actually…..

Doktor Zymm

Mmm, yam shortbread is really good

WCS

BANNER THIS NOW

Sharkbait

Maybe Redshirt broke WordPress.

herodotus450

WordPress signed with the Bengals and promptly tore its ACL

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

ALL THE PIECES FIT!

Redshirt

I should’ve picked a better banner than.

Brocky

I’m still disappointed my falcons comment didn’t get more love:.

I’ll never understand why Trump thought it was a good idea to let Dan Quinn run his campaign in Georgia

King Hippo

It WAS banner-nominated within the Politburo, we just have had technical difficulties

blaxabbath

It’s true though.

Why don’t they just send him to Pray It Away Camp?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The Supreme Court just made that legal again. Coney Island Babymaker was so excited about the decision that she showed up for work the next day with band-aids on every single one of her fingers.

blaxabbath

So why is it, smart guys, that my Hulu Live app knows how much time is going to be left on this broadcast when it’s only the third quarter?

Because it’s a corrupt hoax, that’s why.

Brocky

hey redshirt, what’s your ethnic background?

because I’m starting to think one of your ancestors in the old country pissed off the wrong gypsy

Redshirt

English, Irish, Scottish, German, Quaker

So, yeah. My ancestors probably pissed everyone off.

blaxabbath

He comes from a long line of gypsy slayers.

Doktor Zymm

It’s probably whichever ancestors moved to Cincinnati that are really to blame

Petronel

Little Chubb, going long in the damp.

Last edited 3 years ago by Petronel
Petronel

And KHunt to finish.

WCS

Even Willis McGhee is like. “Damn….”

Redshirt

Now I wish I voted for Trump. If I don’t get a future, then no one gets a future!

Doktor Zymm

Will it make you feel better if Trump gets indicted on Jan 21st?

blaxabbath

It’s just the DEEP STATE making up his DNA sequence to match his rape victims who, by the way, if it is his DNA, wanted it.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I can’t wait for him to turn his ire towards Genentech.

blaxabbath

When science is arbitrary, who is to say DNA evidence is to be relied upon?

Bonus: Can’t use to free wrongfully convicted negrites!

blaxabbath

Oh yeah. Because the Bengals were on the cusp of greatness…..

Redshirt

I checked out the Bengals subreddit. It sent me to a dark place.

Doktor Zymm

No one should ever stray outside of AITA

blaxabbath

How the hell can that be an INT when the DPI was so apparent? Literally hanging off of Wentz’s target.

blaxabbath

Anytime you see a FG blocked in the NFL, you can be sure an announcer is within 12 seconds of saying some defender has “big paws”.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

You just reminded me that there will probably be no Puppy Bowl this year and that is sad.

Doktor Zymm

WHAT!?

blaxabbath

Derek Andersen looking like he may have to hand off the Browns Playoffs Crown to BayMay.

King Hippo

Coach Epps gives like, ZERO FUCKS.

Recovery Whiskey

Prater just a bit outside

Redshirt

Dave Lapham said “[*Redacted] s” one too many times.

blaxabbath

The faux wood fence that THEPAULS have on their vinyl banners is….appropriate and funny and pathetic.

clint greasewood

Looks like ole Clint is going to be knocked out of fantasy playoff contention by either the Browns Defense or Eagle Offense pick one.

Mother Puncher

Do not go to the Bengals subreddit right now. Good God

litre_cola

/immediately goes to the Bengals subreddit.

blaxabbath

Is there a linkshare between them and R/QAnon?

Recovery Whiskey

Reddit live threads are known for their calm and rational reactions to game events. — Jon Lovitz.

Doktor Zymm

That is a lot of links to the replay on Twitter

Gumbygirl

That was a gorgeous pass from Taysom, too bad!

blaxabbath

Sad!

King Hippo

Pretty impressive that Lamar! can play this shitty, and Balmer still be up 8 on a team like the Tits.

rockingdog

is walkin mustache
RB Gio Bernard gonna
do anything today?

litre_cola

Safety Dance, sigh.

blaxabbath

Eagles be all like, “Our votes weren’t counted!”

Spur
WCS

Lots of knees going asploidy today…

Mother Puncher

.

FNZ607S.jpg
Redshirt

Cincinnati Bengals 2020 Season: We All Knew It Would Happen

Redshirt

Bengals just got Greg Cook’d again.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Thanks, Yahoo, for letting me know that Joe Burrow is “questionable”. Pretty sure he’s “mostly dead”.

Recovery Whiskey

Nice of RedZone to find the best angle on that Burrow incident

King Hippo

RedZone showed the replay. That’s gonna be the “unholy trinity” of CLs shredded.

Mother Puncher

Eh my dog had the same injury. Was playing football again a month later

King Hippo

What’s your vet’s number? – Mike B., Cincinnati, OH

Mother Puncher

Some old Christian guy that usually works on farm animals out here in the country. Pretty sure my dog has horse tendon in him now

King Hippo

I will give you $20 in concessions vouchers for that number now. – Mike B., Cincinnati, OH

Mother Puncher

This good boy is part horse!

Mother Puncher

.

20201122_151305.jpg
King Hippo

yellow lab? Them’s is the nicest of dogs.

Mother Puncher

Maybe. Some kind of mutt