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2020 Quotables – Week 14 (Submissions)

blaxabbath

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,

Everyone getting ready for some fantasy football playoff action this week? Me too! You know, I had an autodrafted squad and didn’t even touch the roster until week 2 but I locked up a postseason spot last week actually and —

“No one cares.” “Doesn’t matter.”

Anyways, I didn’t catch a lick of football this weekend so you’ll have to HippoTalk for any thoughts on, you know, the NFL. For me, I’m a little sick, a lot of tired, and just really phoning this in. So, yeah, I guess you could go ahead and call me Carson Wentz — except Nick Foles has never won me a Super Bowl.

Anyways, you can find your Week 14 Quotables submissions below.

“What do you mean she ain’t verified, Pornhub?” -D. Haskins
I’m pretty sure no team has been the butt of more Quotables submissions than the Detroit Lions.
“That’s cute boy but rock music is ours; Elvis took it fair and square.”
I mean….this is actually just good football.
“Are the bounty payments prorated if they haven’t graduated yet?” -Cesar Sayoc
Bill Barr already on to bigger and better things, i see.
I assume the rest of you understand this….
When you gotta drop a Baltimore…
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blaxabbath

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“:: Maniacal Laughter:: “

– L. Christmas

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LemonJello

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I’d say “Look at all this cannon fodder,” but the truth is these wannabe Pattons will get a lot of young enlisted soldiers killed because of their poor decisions.

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LemonJello

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♫♫ Fat Humps, Fat Humps, My gravy has no lumps. Fat Humps Fat Humps Fat Humps ♫♫

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Don T

?solid. solid like a rockXCUSEME solid. solid like a…?
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Don T

Answer her: am I wearing clean underwear? See!
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BrettFavresColonoscopy

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Balls thinks these guys talk politics too much

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

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Petting someone on the head in a “good boy” fashion? Seems like a Jerry Richardson move.

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Viva La Tabula Raza

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*Pete Townshend files trademark infringement lawsuit.*

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Duchess

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Breaking News: 3/4ths of the teams in the NFC North have petitioned the league to allow them to designate Aaron Rodgers as “Permanent QB” in the remaining conference games.

2
Duchess

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Why is it if you were to add the Team with No Name to the Team with No City you would still get a Team with No Playoff Chances?

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Duchess

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I think this is called “Catching the Whoa-vid”

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

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“Great things happen in Glendale!”
–Nobody

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

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“Dan Snyder won’t pay for unlimited data”

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

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HAND UP, PLEASE SHOOT!

1
BrettFavresColonoscopy

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/Marvin Harrison cocks gun

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Downfield Matriculator

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“Back in my day, we had standards. The ref is right there — throw the flag!”

— H. McCringleberry, Penn State 2012

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blaxabbath

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Sorry to be crude with this submission. It’s real low-hanging fruit…a dingleberry, if you will.

1
BrettFavresColonoscopy

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/sphincter flies open

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blaxabbath

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“Ah yes, this Michael Flynn Clone Army will easily crush the #succession/#mashalllaw rebellion.”

-Empress K. Harris (Feb 1, 2021)

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LemonJello

This is so good.

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LemonJello

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Is this Gritty’s love child from that one spring break in Ft Lauderdale?

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Redshirt

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(play music in the background)
NFL Flims- The Equalizer – YouTube

“Lamar Jackson valiantly takes the Browns to the Super Bowl.” – Ghost of John Facenda

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King Hippo

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Man, I NEVAR had this little problem when I had access to the Senate cafeteria THANKS OBAMA!!!1111

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LemonJello

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Oh! That’s what he meant by saying “Be back after dropping crab pots in Baltimore Harbor!”

Last edited 5 years ago by LemonJello
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BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

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These whipper snappers with their Snap Tok dances and Tik Chat memes. Git off my lawn

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BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

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The door was closer to containing Lamar then the Browns.

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BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

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Today we honour our tributes to COVID

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SonOfSpam

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“Welcome to Miami, where the fans are enjoying the ‘Body Fat Percentage Jersey’ giveaway, sponsored by Papa John’s and Crisco.”

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SonOfSpam

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Rookies nowadays are responsible for providing the head coach with enthusiastic directions to the nearest Hometown Buffet.

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LemonJello

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Yakety Sax, Sad Trombone and the Price Is Right Loser Horn all fight for the honor of NOT being used in this clip.

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BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

I’m kinda surprised they even made it to the LOS

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LemonJello

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♫♫ “I’m a little gravy boat, short and stout!” ♫♫

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Dunstan

“Gravy, you say?” — A. Reid

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BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

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He did it all for the dookie

1
ballsofsteelandfury

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I CALL THIS COVID CHARLIE BECAUSE IT’S GONNA WIPE OUT MORE YOUNG SOLDIERS THAN THE VIET CONG!

4
SonOfSpam

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This must be that rare “Hilton with a bunch of black guys” video where Paris isn’t cum-engulfed.

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BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

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She’s from Canada, you wouldn’t know her.

1
ArmedandHammered

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Wait, you mean you can actually see them when you talk to them? – Manti T.

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litre_cola

I cam here to make a Lenay Kukua joke. Glad to see it taken care of.

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ArmedandHammered

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Damn! You almost scared the shit out of me!

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ballsofsteelandfury

This is brilliant

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ArmedandHammered

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“I cannot have anyone on this team show more competence than I possess – get rid of them!” – D. Snyder

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LemonJello

Toady: “But, Supreme Leader Snyder, they’re the other team…”

D. Snyder: “I SAID GET RID OF THEM! EXECUTE ORDER 66!”

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