![[DOOR FLIES OPEN]](https://doorfliesopen.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/DFO-MC-Patch.png)
Dear DTZM,
I owe you (1) word count.
Love,
Sebastian Blax
PS – Below are your Week 15 Quotables submissions.
2020 Quotables – Week 15 (Submissions)
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46 Comments
I haven’t seen someone miss a header so completely since…[little help, Hippo?]
Jayne Mansfield
“…and then Hillary used acid to wash the servers, which is why COVID was able to commit election fraud…”
“Ha ha ha, dork.” – Eli Manning, drinking out of a big boy cup
This would be a great example of Newtonian physics that can be used to help student athletes relate better to science. Or at least the students taking the courses for the athletes.
And now for your enjoyment, the River of Gravy Dancers.
“Wooo, I’m Pacman Jones!”
“Also, Jim, I just wanted to congratulate you for getting Clemson and Ohio State to play in your head. Because you look like a Sugar Bowl. And, no, I’m not at all upset that I had to blow four different old men to get this gig, while you waltz in here looking like the retarded offspring of Alfred E. Neuman and Dumbo.”
Textbook Wharton Defense, all business decisions.
That should be a banner. Damn, that’s good.
-Where are the Estefans?
-I told them we signed David DeCastro
Last edited 5 years ago by Don T
Can’t beat drinking if they won’t let you beat women anymore.
WHOSE HOUSE IS THIS?
UNCLEAR, OUR HOUSE? POSSIBLY THE GIANTS’ OR JIMMY HOFFA’S?
The ladies love having something to hold onto
I bet they use those ears like the handles on a handheld buffer, to polish their pearl as long as possible.
Last edited 5 years ago by ArmedandHammered
Classic 2020 failing to kill these guys
“THE BEN DIDN’T SAY THE HARD R”
“Doctors say I got the biggest hardest R!”
-S Darnold
If I saw that many fat humps dancing around, I’d surrender, too
You gotta sneak your Carolina BBQ sauce in KC if you don’t want to awaken the…
Oh God, it’s alive.
?itemid=3528773
The Blind Side 2: Without the Annoying White Lady in the Way, I’m Taking It To The House
Let he who is without sin cast the first fatty
“Coaching staff don’t even notice these Five Hour Energy drinks if’n you strip off the labels!”
Gotta get in that [DFO] Headspace.
“Yep — everything looks above board here.”
-D. Brix
VAR has confirmed that the ball boy dove, he will receive a red card and has been ejected from the match
-Ref
Lying down and drinking on the job is nawt the image the shield wants to show
Before Derrick Henry loses the off-season weight
And down goes next weeks starting QB for the Bears.
So you’re saying if I die in a helicopter crash then people will forget I’ve been accused of rape numerous times? Tight.
Last edited 5 years ago by Duchess
There is this hippy place that makes smoothies and everyone is “FANTASTIC! Thank you for ASKING!” that my wife likes. All new age herbal crap and shit. Then they have a poster of Kolorado Kobe on the wall.
I hate those people so much.
I still think she was just in it for the payday.
The criminal case was tossed because she refused to testify because she was doxxed and getting death threats. She only perused a civil case afterward. To which Kobe settled super fast for less than he spent on his future wife engagement ring.
Interesting.
Didn’t realize the Deep State was out to get Kobe too. This only further solidifies my belief that the 2020 election was fraudulent.
Focus on the ears and you miss the real message here. Their blinks just said MF. Now count the ears and eyes you get 6. 4 on the guy 2 on the girl… But she’s talking add 0.
Jan. 6th at 4:20 Trump will announce Military Force…Q is the way.
Last edited 5 years ago by Duchess
The guy on the left is JFK, Jr. The ears are a result of the cosmetic surgery.
Legend says if E. Rutherford Luvu sees his shadow then the Jets have a 33% chance of winning the game.
Fat guy rushing is #4 on the list of best things in football behind #3 any fat guy touchdown, #2 fat guy interceptions, and #1 fat guy pick-six.
Last edited 5 years ago by Unsurprised
“So that’s why everyone laughed when I played.”
-J. Lorenzen
Whatever she’s saying is going in one ear and…. yeah we lost it.
You deleted all the videos, right?
I kept thinking about this all morning or last night or whatever for like a fucking hour that Big Ben isn’t in prison because his bodyguards are off-duty cops who intimidated his victims and I fucking hate fucking cops so fucking much.
It must be awkward having a restraining order against a coworker
You try and resist the urge to pull on those things.
That’s what she said
“I thought the expression was throw in the towel BOY. Ohhhh. Ok just the towel? Well whatever I quit.”
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