Monday Morning Mock Draft: Chapter The 11th, (Because I Forgot Last Week’s Title)

One of the biggest things I miss from our old site was the mock drafts that used to run every Friday. Those were fantastic time wasters, and a good one was a virtual guarantee that you were going to be far from productive at work, as your day instead degenerated into arguments with strangers over who would be the best Saturday cartoon character to have sex with, (and now we all know how that would go), or some other equally inane topic, all of which were still more important than that TPS report deadline your boss was yelling about. Good times.

Well, it’s been long enough. After a discussion in the back channels yours truly is bringing it back, with some slight rule changes. The old site had 4-5 main contributors, one of whom may not have been real. So they’d do 2-3 rounds themselves, then kick it to the kommentariat to draft whatever was left over. You can do that when you’ve only taken 10-15 of whatever topic was up for drafting. We, however, are a much more connected group when it comes to the writin’ and draftin’ of things, so if we did that we’d easily take out 30-50 before we threw the bedraggled leftovers to our beloved readership. That’s no fun. So these drafts, which I expect to last as long as I remember to do them, (2-3 weeks), will just leap right into it.

Also, for content and alliteration reasons, we’ve moved the draft to Monday mornings, so get ready to kill your productivity right from the start.

First come, first served, subject to my randomly assigning the first pick to someone else, generally because they came up with the idea. Or because they bribed me. For now, please wait 10 picks or 30 minutes before making another one. That will be revised up or down depending on how much participation we get, which I hope will be a lot.

This week’s draft comes from the esteemed Rikki-Tikki-Deadly, who in turn was inspired by the original KSK Mock Draft. Apparently the had one where you drafted your rock star girlfriend, (or boyfriend, if that’s what floats your boat), and he made some mention of it. Despite having no recollection of said draft a lightbulb clicked in my head, a lightbulb that said, “Hey! If you rip this idea off, you don’t actually have to do any thinking this week!” Well, that talking lightbulb certainly sold me. With that, this week’s topic is “Rock Star Girlfriend/Boyfriend”

Rules:

They have be a musical act, solo or part of a band, doesn’t matter

They do not have to be alive, but please make sure that you let us know you’re drafting them in their prime, or you will be judged harshly.

The draft, much like the Rock n’ Roll Hall of Fame, is, despite its name, not confined to the rock genre. If he or she is ska, rap, blues or, ugh, pop country, you go right ahead and live that little fantasy.

Finally, please do not use this draft as an excuse to write more fan fiction and send it to said artist. No one needs that, least of all the artist in question. Unless it’s like, Morrissey. Go ahead and bug him.

Since Rikki gave me this idea, however inadvertently, he gets the first pick. I suspect Susannah Hoffs is going to be off the board with a quickness. The rest of you,

— [DOOR FLIES OPEN] —

An incredibly handsome man strides into the room. He’s of below-average height, but is brimming with such self-confidence he might as well be ten feet tall. On his arm is…