Your Late-ish Afternoon NFL Football Open Thread

I can almost see the finish line boys. There’s but three tilts to choose from but if you like the footed ball they’re all interesting in their own way. Just like your children. (if you have children, if you don’t, family members work as well)

To The Games!

Cards/Browns:

The Cards run D gives up an average of 4.9 yards per rush so far this year. What I’m trying to say is that Kareem Hunt is going to have himself one helluva day. And really that’s the best thing for the Browns-just having Mayfield hand the ball off because things get dicey when he tosses it. Just ask OBJ. Is Koach Kliff a dumb anti-vaxxer? Back in July he had no idea how many of his players had gotten the needle. Hmmm… Today he’ll be resting comfortably away from the game and in his mistaken beliefs.

Raiders/Broncos:

Both Carr’s and Bridgewater’s early success was due to them stretching the field. As anyone could have guessed, they’ve both started to revert back to old habits. Both were near 9 yards per pass attempt and both are coming back to about 6 lately. Fantasy points-wise the Denver D has allowed the 2nd-least fantasy points to qb’s. NO FLY ZONE part deux?

Cowboys/Pats:

The schedule makers are two years too late with this one. But I guess the Bradyless Pats have to play someone. The Dallas D is second in turnovers produced (12) but are also 25th in yards allowed per play. The sked doesn’t look that bad (yay, NFC least!) so they may be able to sustain their success but that oughta get fixed before the playoffs arrive.

Have at it.

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clint greasewood

Diggs taketh and Diggs giveth away

King Hippo

As the prophecy foretold.

ArmedandHammered

Sudden change part deau

Mr. Ayo

Straight to PLAID!!

Gatoraids

lol dallas The Bourne Derpmacy

Petronel

WOOP WOOP WOOP

Horatio Cornblower

SUDDEN OTHER CHANGE!!!

Also, how do you fuck that up?

Sharkbait

SUDDENER CHANGE

Horatio Cornblower

Tyron Smith knocked Pollard back there.

I know Smith is a legend, but he needs to retire.

Horatio Cornblower

SUDDEN CHANGE!!

Don T

Sudden change!

Spur

FUCK YEAH

Spur

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Sharkbait

Well fuck

BrettFavresColonoscopy

[Doctor Nick voice] Hi everybody! I walked 12 miles to a brewery and just drank there instead of watching the Bears lose. Did i miss anything around these parts?

yeah right

A lovely day with fewer hobo killings than normal.

King Hippo

Captain Bluebunny wants to join the Fangio/Judge sack race. WHAT A WEAK SHITHEAD.

Horatio Cornblower

Mike McCarthy everyone!

Gatoraids

Return of the Mc

Gatoraids

Return of the Mac V2

Mr. Ayo

4d chess!!

Mr. Ayo

5d chess from Belichick!

Spur

I’d run it here

Spur

and Dallas doesn’t and a missed FG

Mr. Ayo

You fool!

Horatio Cornblower

My comments are loading slow, but I’m right there with you. It may work out, thanks to the INT, but you can’t settle for a 51-yard FG attempt, (which would have been blocked anyway if it went straight), on 4th-and-1 in that situation.

Gumbygirl

How can there still be 11 minutes left in this game?

King Hippo

In Denver? God remembered to hate me, and not just Brocky.

Horatio Cornblower

They just don’t even bother calling the “too much time” penalty anymore.

Redshirt

Millions of dollars in profits, but no one bothered to go “Hey, why don’t we put a buzzer on the referees or an audible shot clock that goes off when the Play Clock runs out.”

Spur

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Horatio Cornblower

It’s been a problem for years. They don’t wrap up well.

Or at all, really.

Spur

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Redshirt

Based on how good LV is doing today, I’m starting to suspect the Raiders released the Gruden Emails to get rid of him. Damn.

ArmedandHammered

Holy crap the Liouns HC threw Goff under the bus.

Gatoraids

hell end up missing it

ArmedandHammered

Well if any directions included look east or west, of course he would.

Redshirt

Damn, getting blown out by the Bengals changes a team. He went from crying for his team to blaming the QB like that.

Spur

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King Hippo

I wonder who the Donks will name as interim head coach tomorrow?

Redshirt

Jon Gruden in a fake mustache?

King Hippo

Juan Grudenero!

Spur
Redshirt

Nothing is certain but death, taxes and A.J. Green owning the Cleveland Browns.

A.J. Green Makes Incredible One-Handed Juggling Hail Mary TD Catch! | Browns vs. Bengals | NFL – YouTube

Spur

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Horatio Cornblower

It’s been a long time since I really cared about a football game’s outcome, and I have to say, these constant commercial breaks are really goddamned annoying.

Gatoraids

goto the Red Zone where its always Plaid speed

Redshirt

I was tempted to get RedZone, but my team always plays in the 1:00 hour, so I would only use RedZone for the afternoon games. Also, when I watch it was family and friends, my jumping back and forth quickly enough to watch both would always give them headaches.

Gatoraids

Redzone also good for commercial breaks and halftime, or if your game goes to shit which as a fins fan happens alot

Horatio Cornblower

How much money have the Cowboys bet on the Patriots to win outright?

ArmedandHammered

Did we enter some fresh hell of a time line where the Cards are actually good?

Gatoraids

head coaches are better off at home

Gatoraids

no kliff, no gruden, and does The Beav ever count as there

ArmedandHammered

Beginning to believe that their record is actually a glitch in the matrix.

ArmedandHammered

They don’t actually win that many games, the glitch is the record of being unbeaten.

Redshirt

It may be schedule too. I’d say we wait until after they play Green Bay on TNF. If they leave that game 8-0, then its time to start looking for the black cats.

King Hippo

Ouch, my KHunt!! – Millions of fantasy GMs

Horatio Cornblower

Houston, between 492 and 493

King Hippo

oh you win the day, good sir

Gatoraids

gah going to be some brutal bye weeks now

Spur

Tyron Smith out. FUCK

Horatio Cornblower

OK slapdicks, let’s try to keep this up the rest of the half.

Spur

CeeDee Lamb! Awesome throw by Dak

Spur

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Spur

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ThePirateSloth

JJ Watt might possibly be the very opposite of Mutombo

Last edited 3 years ago by ThePirateSloth
Spur

Havent seen this many dead Patriots since the Battle of Fort Washington

NotShogunButShogun

I enjoy the part where people think the Captain knows what he’s doing.

Horatio Cornblower

I haven’t seen this many Patriots strewn across the ground since Lexington.

Redshirt

MSNBC: “Well, viewing audience, it has finally happened. The conservative extreme right has finally attacked the innocent British soldiers just marching and minding their own business and has led the rest of the Colonies, who only want peaceful relations with the Crown and our British Siblings, into open warfare. And this is only would’ve happened due to lax Musket Control.”

(changes channel)

Fox News: “WAR! Suck it, William Wallace! We’ll do what your failed to do!”

Col. Duke LaCross

Great day for all you Johnny Stanton owners.

Horatio Cornblower

Mike McCarthy is going to try that baby stroller play, and Belichick is going to have his defense stampede the stroller into the ground.

Belichick has also never seen the commercial, and has no idea if there’s a baby in there or not.

Redshirt

Hey, once that baby goes into jet motion against a defense in press man coverage, its fate is sealed.

NotShogunButShogun

Unless they jump into Tampa-2. At which point someone is hanging around.

Spur

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ThePirateSloth

I like how Buttfumble thinks he knows the kinda guy Mayfield is.

Spur

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Horatio Cornblower

Good to see that patented Dallas tackling technique of not tackling is back.

Spur

KILL THE MAC!

Spur

Yeah, Raiders going FU mode. i like it. Mark Davis was the poorest owner now he has Vegas money backing him. Release the EMAILS!

King Hippo

At least I didn’t make a #ShameBet with Rikki. BLECH