Ain’t Gonna Spread FOAR No Roses? Saturday Night Thread

What a cracker between City and Arsenal to start 2022.  City are basically the Roll Damn Tide of the EPL.  They just keep coming, and coming, until the dam breaks.  And it ALWAYS eventually breaks.  Like Bama denying the likes of Notre Dame, I am satisfied to have a team who I have neutral feelings about…crush the dreams of shitbirds like Chelski and the Redshite.  They face off tomorrow, but they have no chance at the title and they KNOW it.  Fookin’ lovely.

Were the Gooners hearing this in their heads?

Tonight’s pseudo-entertainment!

Utah (+4) v. Theeeeee Ohio State (5:00, ESPN)

It will never be not weird to me, this game being on not-NBC.  Team Secular Big Love is very happy to be here (too much so for it to feel like a normal gameday?), tOSU maxed their opt-out potential.  But, you know, their 2nd string has laughably better recruiting ratings than the Utes.  But Kyle Whittingham might be the best pure head coach (ie, factoUring out the GM component) in the JV NFL ranks.  In short…don’t bet this one.

Baylor (+1.5) v. Ole MIss (8:45, ESPN)

Every pundit was lining up to shit all over the SEC’s performance in exhibition season.  But then…uh…yesterday kind of happened.  Look, I was asleep well before midnight on NYE, the odds of me staying up for this is quite slim.  Can Johnny Reb really function as the “white hat” squadron?  With Koach Kiffin at the helm?  I’ve been told that a pre-game walk through The Grove is as neck-spinning as it gets for the pervert.  So, I will say yes.  Show them Texas Yankees what ol’ Johnny Reb can do when he puts his’n mind to it!! 

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King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
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Mr. Ayo

More like Ole Loss

Horatio Cornblower

A game between Baylor and any team coached by Lane Kiffin has me scanning the skies, just hoping for a fast approaching comet.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Come on, 2022 has to get way worse first

Redshirt

https://twitter.com/espn/status/1477478843950804995

At least he’s able to get started networking for a job as a Graduate Assistant. But seriously, my heart breaks for him and good for him for not staying in back and pouting. The fact that he’s able to go on crutches and be on the sidelines should be a good sign its nothing too horrific.

Last edited 2 years ago by Redshirt
Horatio Cornblower

Plus it gives Kirk Herbstreit a boner, so there’s that.

Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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litre_cola

I don’t think it will hurt his draft stock. I think if the kids want to play they should play. If they want to sit out then sit out. Should be 100 percent what they want to do. We make decisions every day, yes there is risk in playing a meaningless game, but really aren’t they all? He could be a Leaf, or Akili Smith so this could be the apex for him. You just never know.

SonOfSpam

“Wait, you’re saying he might know a guy???”

-T. Marinovich

Brick Meathook

That kid’s just having fun out there.

Redshirt

With the way social media is now a day, there is no way Ryan Leaf gets drafted #2. He would’ve tweeted himself out of millions of dollars and saved the San Diego Chargers some headaches.

Gumbygirl

I don’t know, there was plenty of public evidence Johnny Manziel was a trainwreck, but that didn’t stop the Brownies!

Horatio Cornblower

Yes, but those are the Browns, and Manziel still fell to 17.

Gumbygirl

He did fall, didn’t he?

Horatio Cornblower

He did. I have very specific, and terrible, memories of being convinced that the Cowboys were going to draft him as he was falling. There’s a story that Stephen Jones actually wrestled the phone away from Jerry and kept that from happening. Probably not true, but I choose to believe it.

Gumbygirl

He still went in the first round though. Lol Browns gonna Browns!

SonOfSpam

SODDEN CHANGE (regarding my underwear)

litre_cola

As soon as Golden Corrall went down I had an inkling my gamblor ticket was fucked.

Forever fuck Herbstreit

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

SÜNDEN CHANGE

Horatio Cornblower

If there’s an Allstate Sugar Bowl why can’t there be a ‘Mel Gibson Presents The Sugartits Bowl’?

SonOfSpam

Jews can attend but must wear stars of a certain color.

Horatio Cornblower

And none of this “last call in the 3rd quarter” shit, either.

Horatio Cornblower

Dean Evason mention! Drink!
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