We’re into the meaty portion of the 2021 postseason, and what an occasion for NFL calendar pedantry (2022 starts after the Superb Owl), and also crowing about the Tennessee Titans Tits of Titanium being the AFC’s #1 seed.

Ok.

In reconsideration, more score-settling than crowing.

A. During Weeks 7-17, everyone gave mad love to the Colts. To those I say, from the bottom of my heart: eat shit.

A-1. The AFC hot topics during the season went like this: Bills, Ravens? JaMarr Chase OMG Bengals!, What’s wrong with the Bills?, Jonathan Taylor MVP!, Chiefs turning it around, Jax eliminate Colts. In the meantime, the Titans finished 8-3 against teams with winning records. For the culprits of such a shameful slight, allow me to recommend a classic soundtrack:

Via @RealSardonicus

A-2. Yeah, I’m bailing on this bit.

I’m not even sour or angry. I mean, sheeeeeeeeit. Right now, the Titans are in their best moment of the season: humbled (Jets + Texans Ws), healthy (everyone is active), and rested.

The main problem from last season was the defense: generous at third down conversions, pretty chill as a pass rush. Right now, the Titans defense might be the best unit of the team; it’s certainly their most consistent. TEN is the only team with three pass rushers with 8+ sacks: LB Harold Landry III and DL Denico Aurty and Jeffery Simmons. Remember when the official consensus was that the Bills lost to TEN because Josh Allen slipped? Yeah, slipped, into A MASS OF FURY.

Reminder that Josh Allen did not slip pic.twitter.com/m5KtstQ5Ej

— James Foster (@NoFlagsFilm) January 14, 2022

Simmons is delightful, in a “imma fucking kill ya [snarl]” way. .

But! Titans secondary is no joke. CBs Kristian Fulton (Ja’Marr Chase’s teammate at LSU) and SS Amani Hooker are studs. Janoris d/b/a Jackrabbit Jenkins… Not so much. I’ve never watched film, but in 70% of the passing TDs against TEN, Jenkins was in the neighborhood. Furthermore,

*Facebook has anti hack software covering it*
The Software: pic.twitter.com/J4C6FjAdqD

— Bruno Reagan (@BrunoReagan) October 4, 2021

And FS Kevin Byard bounced back from a terrible year into 1st-Team All Pro, an award that still means something dammit!.

Special teams – Titans got good at kickoff returns (9.8 yds per, 9th in the NFL), and not-bad at punt returns (19.5 avg., 27th in the NFL). The kicker is Randy Bullock a/k/a Fat Randy, who was a steady stud early and mid-season, and then faltered lately. I’ve heard a high BMI keeps one warmer in the cold, so my trust in my husky comrade is full. Punter Brett Kern,

In the KC 3 – 27 TEN three months ago, Kern had two punts, both were INSIDE THE 5. I humbly ask: is this NOT excellence itself?

Ha! Double negative I win woooooo!11!11

The offense:

#Titans PPG by star availability

with Julio, AJ, and Henry: 26.8

with just AJ and Henry: 35.5

with just Julio and Henry: 25

with just AJ and Julio: 28

with just Henry: 24

with just AJ: 18

with just Julio: 16.5

with nobody: 13

— Mike Herndon (@MikeHerndonNFL) December 20, 2021

QB Ryan Tannehill was pummeled between Weeks 1 and…. 13? Pass protection is a real problem for the Titans. So I guess you can understand my personal concern for Bengals DL Trey Hendrickson’s health. It’s self-interested–is that right? No, wait. I meant concern for the other, disn… disinterested. Ay, this English of mine [exaggerated gesturing]

Will say: Ryan Tannehill is one tough hombre. Brave too; he’s not afraid to throw 50 / 50 balls to the likes of TE Anthony Firkser and WR Nick Westbrook-Ikhine down by 6 with 2 minutes to play in the 4th QRT. It has worked. And, now AJ and Julio Jones are healthy. I can see a cottage industry of short-of-the-sticks 3rd down passes converted by AJ or Julio just muscling their way to the marker.

Run blocking by the Tennessee Titans is one of the loveliest things to watch if yer into aggressive shoving (hell yeah kill!). Henry played only eight games, but the raw rushing numbers were not much different:

What the Titans have been able to do with the run game in the aggregate since Derrick Henry went down has been phenomenal.

Henry in 1st 8 games: 219 carries, 937 yds, 10 TDs.

Next 8 games w/out Henry:
Foreman/Hilliard/McNichols/Peterson combined for:
212 carries, 945 yds, 5 TDs

— Chris Harris (@ChrisHarrisWSMV) January 3, 2022

It’s stuff like this that makes analytic types tremble with delight, as the “RBs are fungible!” yappin’ is confirmed. That is, if the neeeeerds! ignore El Tractorcito’s 10 TDs in EIGHT games. Fungi…? gate that!

Derrick Henry is back and I trust Derrick Henry and a kickass OL who is rested and with all 1st stringers back.

I had predicted 12-5, Titans make the AFC Championship. Allow me to add,

The surprise: Mike Vrabel is a wonderful coach. There were no excuses for injuries, and TEN commits very few mental errors. On 4th down, Vrabel goes for it as often as I like. And Vrabel doesn’t fuck up timeouts. The bad: TEN was very conservative at the end of 1st halves. The Week 18 game at Houston was the first time I remember TEN’s offense being aggressive for a score with around a minute left in the 2nd QRT. Titans scored a TD–then the Tits rested at the wheel during the 3rd QRT and the Texans almost came back. Didn’t happen, and a hella healthy-looking Julio Jones caught his first TD as a Titan.

If the Titans go on to the AFC Championship, I’ll tell the origin story of Mike Vrabel’s pledge to cut his dick off for a Superb Owl. The heart warms at the thought of castration.

Banner via @MundoLigreGo; gifs via giphy.com