The recording studio at KDFO looks much as we’d remember it from the before-time. There is no evidence of the PRODUCER’s long descent into quarantine madness, or of DJ 3000’s intense focus on performing document review for the January 6th Investigation Committee. The PRODUCER is seated in front of the sound console, cheerfully conversing with a familiar face already seated behind the microphone.
PRODUCER: …and I’m sure it’s been a treat to get the new rookies in for the minicamp.
ANDY REID: It has, it has, but it hasn’t been all rib tips and hot links, if you know what I mean.
PRODUCER: I…think I understand. There’s been a few snags, I take it?
ANDY REID: A few. You see, a lot of these kids, they only know me from what they’ve seen on TV, so they think I’m just this big jolly Santa Claus coach. And I get frustrated because they show up for these minicamps unprepared.
PRODUCER: You mean, they turn up out of shape?
ANDY REID: No, no, they’re all incredible athletes coming out of college programs. Physically most of them are in better shape than our veterans. I mean that they don’t arrive with the proper equipment.
PRODUCER: Equipment like…cleats? Shoulder pads?
ANDY REID: Huh? No. I’m talking about seasonings.
PRODUCER: Seasonings?
ANDY REID: Sure. Let’s start with salt. You’ve got your old familiar high school coach refrain of “take a salt tablet” when the heat starts getting to you. And let me tell you, running around in June in Missouri is no joke, even without pads. But if you’ve been salting your pre-practice brisket properly, that really shouldn’t be an issue.
PRODUCER: Isn’t that something the team nutritionist handles?
ANDY REID: Eh, yes and no. In college, these kids are part of a program that’s going to take care of that stuff for you. They’re with you for every meal. But that’s not how it works in the pro’s. You need to be responsible for your own regimen. Of course the team is going to have resources to help you reach peak performance, but you’re not going to be coddled anymore. And that’s one of the things we try to address right away in these minicamps.
PRODUCER: [incredulous] Seasoning food. You spend the first part of your minicamp focused on making sure your grilled meat is properly salted.
ANDY REID: Well it’s not just salt. You’ve got your four basic tastes – salty, sweet, sour, and bitter. Patrick’s got his ketchup, that’s a good example of sour – acid, really – that adds brightness to your dishes. And then you’ve got your flavors, things that actually bring the food to life. Kelce’s a good example, he’s got all these film caninsters full of oregano that he brings around with him everywhere. Says it helps him stay hungry. Speaking of hungry, my publicist said that there was going to be some kind of cheese plate available…
PRODUCER: Of course, of course. Let’s get the music rolling and then we can dig right in. Let’s go live in three…two…one…
ANDY REID: [into microphone] Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Request Line. You might remember me from my original appearance as one of the last guests prior to COVID quarantine, where we tackled the topic of “meat”. This week we’re going to talk about what goes on the meat. That’s right, we’re looking for songs about flavor. Call in with songs that mention one of those four basic tastes – salty, sweet, sour, or bitter – or any other spices and flavors. I’ll get us started with a self-contained DOUBLE SHOT of two of your basics.
Today’s theme is: Flavors. We’re looking for songs about the basic taste groups, or other flavors. Songs about actually *tasting* things are good too, as well as band or album names that include a flavor. Post links as “https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Th3Rm4L0t” and they should embed in the comments after you refresh. The clue for last week’s puzzle song was “Brandon Spikes” which referred to the puzzle song of “Johnny Hit and Run Paulene” by X. Have at it!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mOj3kJKy-_U
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CO8vBVUaKvk
you almost Blair Witch’d me!
Don’t seem right
Been strung out here all night
I’ve been waiting for the taste
You said you’d bring to me
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ImtdntJQfSs
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=bnzHVGZcP1Y
Needs more salt.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=2aG5RN-33vI
This song tells you everything except how long to cook the turkey.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Jj4s9I-53g
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zqGWrLGaTZc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fa9nN3G2CSg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eHxXsUviKCI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0tauSYtjgHI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DsgYRkApt58
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fB1EpEFz6Lg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CvpMeq_4BPM
oops. replied to wrong post. derp.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BjZpVEMUQ9U
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FCriATVBcWk
I think Beef Reefer has the original down there somewhere, but this cover version kicks so much ass it has to be included. Also comes with the great story that the lead guitarist was sick of doing covers so the lead singer told him that he wrote it to get him to do it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p-cF40OWeak
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1w7OgIMMRc4
Coincidentally, we just had a thunderstorm roll through
Witches can summon lightning…
He’s got the works, He gives you sweet taste
but then you gotta split because you got no time to waste
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YbigVkiAe0s
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0UIB9Y4OFPs
If there was ever a song more clearly written for strippers to make an entrance to, I haven’t heard it.
It’s a full album, but A Mind Is A Terrible Thing To Taste is too good not to mention (fit and quality of music, listening to whole mofo now)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JoXVYSV4Xcs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r7yhIvFG1Rw
oh yeah, I gots a thing for Ms. Mosshart:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KLSXTGmTDtQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=beW9AH1Goxg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6bLOjmY–TA
Kate Pierson has a ridiculously good voice.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uDucg0E4kMI
Here’s Kate just effortlessly blowing Michael Stipe right out of the song. And I like Michael Stipe. Seriously, unless you’re the reincarnation of Freddie Mercury if someone says “Want to do a song with Kate Pierson backing you up”, just concede the song to her and take the backup role.
She’s as sweet as Tupelo honey…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QGkQ4mPiyoU
Great song by a dick human
I know! Sings like an angel, acts like the devil.
Hey hey, it’s the…Archies!
https://youtu.be/h9nE2spOw_o
My favorite STP song
https://youtu.be/YxS4lqppZ6Y
RIP you wacky Scientologist
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sjrdanK4LSY&ab_channel=CartmanBroflovski
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZAN9JIUfpyA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sonW7XyvWsI
“There’s a taste in my mouth
And it’s no taste at all”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S5P63qGTm_g
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nyd5BNkMoJQ
I haven’t heard that in years, awesome!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MyN51_lXyws
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s0kwwHkYdGY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o7Z2I0TqaHI
I specifically move for a House of Pain allowance on account that “Carolina Reaper” is a valid flavor to me.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dy4HA3vUv2c
needs more cowbell….
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8gWbKAcuzN8
Citrus Double Shot!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KaFjxLMsOuo
THIS THREAD I CALL IT LIFE SAVERS CAUSE IT’S GOT YELLOW AND ORANGE AND RED…
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=TZ6B3TAVQE0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qeMFqkcPYcg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H4E2njt3NDk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YEkGqb2wu5k
I can probably do the Candy thing all night…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XPgGjUSEWss
Triple shot!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CyPfb0vOVfo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OtEwfZ2yiuA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zxupnSGDNZE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CtDO3qBo72M
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDfD7M2_geE
Ol man Elvis still doin stuff
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ukPhF9VAo8E&ab_channel=ElvisCostello
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yhwSPRY51gs
Excellent combo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fEH3ubfMw3M
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PlVUEdFkguY
How come you taste so good?
https://youtu.be/Fmfi3UbDPnQ
Fun fact: brown sugar is Andy favorite condiment. He puts it on everything.
The ghost of tWBS compels me!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l03RKO8L-nE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AwWyoc5YfkQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zptC8Oamzwk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F01fzPwBwc4
DOUBLE SHOT!
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=kSOoPk2q280
TRIPLE SHOT!
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=onpuB_6n1PE
Jeffrey Dahmer would hum this while preparing dessert.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1w7OgIMMRc4
maybe some blood as seasoning
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k2WcOdz96ko
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1lyu1KKwC74
It’s a two-fer!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9hGcJA8fXvU
Cinnamon Girl:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u8MGszyeQl8
Cover, featuring Susannah Hoffs, which is always welcome
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aoZEkk2VI_Y&ab_channel=Daburcor
I knew I’d get Blair Witched if I went with this one
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=t2mU6USTBRE