Welcome back to the Beat, Shempions edition! Where we’ve gotta say, like last year, it hasn’t been a good start for the bounty bots, or legends, or gatekeepers, or whatever you want to call them. But the next of them knows a thing or two about turning around bad starts, so where better to turn the luck around than a bot that was originally symmetrical?

It’s tough to have a worse start to BattleBots than Rotator did. Here’s their Season 2 debut fight vs. Witch Doctor, which still happens to be on the ABC YouTube page.

To say Victor Soto and the rest of Team Revolution have worked their way up is an understatement. Victor Soto is a part of that second generation along with the more recognized members of the Miami division of the Florida Bot Mafia, fighting against them at BattleBots iQ tournaments, placing as high as 2nd with Blue Flame in 2011, and paying off in the 2019 season (Season 4) for getting Vault’s revenge from back in 2009, as Rotator did what his and Marc DeVidt’s collaboration couldn’t do, and tank the Reaper until it killed itself, as Tombstone was on fire the whole second half of the fight en route to the KO. In 2020, it led to going through this gauntlet and beating Bronco, which is how Rotator got here.

Fun fact, the robot that’s beaten Rotator in the tournament has now gone on to win the championship the two seasons Rotator’s made it: in 2020, it was a close fight against End Game that even now one can argue if the judges got it right. In 2021, it was Tantrum popping it out of the arena. So good news whoever wins this bounty—you may have the inner track for the Golden Bolt. Or, you’re Rotator and you defended your own bounty. Which will it be? We’ll see. Onto the fights!

Dragon Slayer vs. Uppercut
Dragon Slayer: 1-2, did not qualify
Uppercut: 2-0, #5 seed, lost to Riptide in round of 16

Well, here’s once again your probable 1-8 matchup. Uppercut blew up yet another fuel canister this year, and managed to get 4 KOs in its 3 wins. Because the win against HUGE was a double KO. They weren’t so lucky against Riptide in what may have been the upset of the tournament. Dragon Slayer… beat DUCK!. They did not get to face Black Dragon, sadly. But they did lose to Minotaur and Blade? That’s not the same.

Uppercut debuted a new disk for this one, referred to as The Hoop. It’s the maximum 80 lbs.. Considering what it normally does, that’s absolutely terrifying sounding.

Like the fight against Minotaur, Dragon Slayer started fast, charging towards Uppercut. And flipping themselves back. It didn’t work against Minotaur, and judging by Dragon Slayer being sent spinning it wasn’t going well on this front, but it had taken off one of Uppercut’s stabilizing bars. But turning turtle against Uppercut screamed danger.

But that stabilizing bar was coming into play. Uppercut wanted to come in at the overturned Dragon Slayer but couldn’t due to the gyroscopic forces at play. This gave Dragon Slayer enough time and enough space to get itself righted and try and get ever-so-slightly around Uppercut. That wasn’t quite enough around Uppercut, which had the reach advantage and sent Dragon Slayer back and over again. Gotta try and go to the sides.

Another few clashes left Dragon Slayer still. Uppercut wasn’t moving great either, but good enough.

Uppercut wins by KO in 1:03.

Icewave vs. Free Shipping
Icewave: 2-1, #30 seed, lost to Whiplash in round of 32
Free Shipping: 0-3, did not qualify

Icewave was in this seat once, the hunted. Now, after losing to Skorpios, it’s the hunter, the one going after the bounty. A 2-1 record might have been enough to save the concept of Icewave, but it’s struggled now against the walls of BattleBots, with losses this year to Black Dragon and Whiplash. Hell, it should have been 1-2, but Fusion stealing defeat from the jaws of victory gave Icewave the final Main Event win, getting it the last auto-spot in the tourney as the 30 seed.

Free Shipping didn’t have to worry about any of that! Because Gary Gin’s bot went 0-3 this year. Eh, it’s fine. Now that Robogames is back, he’ll bolt the lifter and flamethrower off of Original Sin and go ahead and win that without losing in the double-elimination tournament, as of course, is tradition. Also tradition? Going with the plow against the horizontal spinner. See Original Sin vs. Last Rites, parts 1-however many. Even if it didn’t work against Tombstone this year.

A novel idea, to make Free Shipping even more Original Sin—put the lifter in the up position so it won’t get mangled. Essentially turning this into Icewave vs. Original Sin with a flamethrower. And as expected, Original Sin was putting that plow to use, tanking every blow that Icewave could throw. And when getting a chance, pushing the overhead into the short corner and to the (wrong square) pulverizer. Icewave was still enough to slip away and get itself spinning.

After these first couple exchanges it was enough for Free Shipping to get the secondary weapon going, which would be the flamethrower. No, Icewave isn’t going to blow up from it, unless this was Gruff or Complete Control. And maybe even then.

Through some lengthy maneuvering, Free Shipping was able to get enough of a circle around to get Icewave to the screws by the Upper Deck, trying to push Icewave in. (Actually, this felt like a time to lower the lifter to try to end the fight with a well-placed flip.) Instead Free Shipping pushed Icewave onto the Deck. Though it took a few seconds, Icewave was able to get down. But Free Shipping would again head it off.

Kenny Florian noted that Free Shipping had kept the weapon up for most of the fight and he’d be wrong. It’s been the whole fight. But hey, you could argue it was being used as a clamp, as Free Shipping took Icewave to both blue square pulverizers. Hey, it’s the best Free Shipping would do on damage as it went to the judges.

Now, this is, in some ways, the Beta-Rotator fight from last year, and if you could, you’d score this fight 3-0, 3-0, damage is whatever, Free Shipping wins. Like… Free Shipping wins the eye test easy. Buuuuut, let’s talk fallout from that fight. This is from the 2021 Judges’ Guide, Version 2021.0 (currently on the BattleBots site), under Aggression:

“If a Bot has a functional weapon but never uses the weapon, or uses it only with little effect, that
Bot should not receive more than 2 points, regardless of how much aggression it showed.”

And similarly, under Control…

“”If a Bot has a functional weapon but never uses the weapon (or uses it only with little effect), that Bot
should not receive more than 2 Control points.

With that in mind, you have to go 2-1 in both aggression and control. As for damage, thanks to Free Shipping’s plow, no real damage was done to either bot. Sure, there’s whatever dents/gouges in the plow, so that’s what, 3-2 Icewave? So I still would have it 6-5 Free Shipping.

And it was a split decision, with Lisa Winter and Derek Young for the winner. It’s Free Shipping by split decision.

Retrograde vs. Mammoth
Retrograde: 1-2, did not qualify
Mammoth: 1-2, alternate chosen in place of Glitch; lost to Witch Doctor in round of 32

Both bots went 1-2, and neither made the tourney. Technically. Mammoth was bot #35 thanks to the double KO loss to Tombstone, first alternate. So when Glitch couldn’t go, in went Mammoth, I guess over Malice or Defender, which I would have imagined had first crack at it, but who knows? The reprieve did not lead to a late run, unless you’re talking about the one Witch Doctor got by facing Mammoth in the first round instead of Glitch.

For Retrograde, it was a rough rookie campaign for the Bloodsport offshoot. They started off with a win over Rampage, but losses to HUGE and Defender scuppered any chance of tournament dreams.

I mean, this was fairly cut and dry, once Mammoth lost its weapon capabilities. If you look closely you can see something come off from that first exchange, and that’s it. Retrograde slowly took more and more control of this match, and for them it’s the signature win of the season.

Retrograde wins by unanimous decision.

Gruff vs. Glitch
Gruff: 1-2, did not qualify
Glitch: 3-0, #9 seed; withdrew before round of 32 (replaced by Mammoth)

Speaking of Glitch, it’s worked out its glitches. Presumably. Considering it’s here and fighting. Two robots ran the table this year. One is Tantrum, duh, won the championship. But Glitch didn’t lose a fight either, instead having to withdraw due to weapon issues. It had drive issues early on, but by the Hydra and Kraken fights, had them figured out… though yes, the weapon was dead enough to withdraw afterwards. But hey, Glitch KOed Kraken. And you normally can’t kill the Kraken.

Gruff had a down year, going 1-2. Sure, they got a win over rookie Switchback, but getting the first OOTA of the year (via episode order, not filming order) and getting the fuel tank ruptured by Cobalt led to two KOs against Gruff, which is known for its durability.

The fight began and the big question was… was Glitch’s weapon working? At first it looked like it was still out, but after a few seconds, finally started really spinning again.

After this moment of tentativeness from both teams, Gruff finally said “fuck it” and rushed. And got its forks bent from Glitch’s eggbeater. That’s always been Gruff’s weakness, those lifting forks, so onto the flamethrowers.

Glitch had mostly been trying to strafe with the omniwheels, though earlier on they got stuck in a killsaw slot, but finally got a chance to be on the front foot, popping Gruff up and then, for good measure, getting the two-hit combo on the underside. But this should have been a time for Glitch to press, not back away from the flames. (Credit to Gruff for knowing when to dispense the flames for that reason.)

Glitch did eventually press, and when it did, it first hit Gruff’s front and did damage to the plow. First of all, that’s rare enough. Then, it nearly sent Gruff over the pulverizer. We have no idea what happens if a bot gets stuck there, but if Glitch is finally getting its wheels under it, this field might want to watch out.

Glitch wins by unanimous decision and will fight Retrograde next.

Free Shipping vs. Uppercut
Well, without watching this fight, I can predict it.

Let’s see how right we were!

Free Shipping returned with the wedge, rather than the plow from Icewave or the usual wedgelets. After the two bots wheeled around and Gary Gin put the wedge where he needed it to be… Free Shipping immediately died on contact.

First off, that’s surprising because normally you need to take all the wheels off of Free Shipping. I wonder what got pushed into what, or whether a wire got knocked loose. I’d actually gather that one. But this is a Hazard-Deadblow thing… a gash, sure, but shouldn’t be a fight ender.

Uppercut, not realizing Free Shipping was definitely out, went to the side, and you guessed it! Not a big boom, but fuel line cut, fizzle as the fuel leaked out, then flame.

Cue the “He can’t keep getting away with it!” memes!

Yes, that one, thank you.

Uppercut wins by KO in under a minute.

Retrograde vs. Glitch
Well, both bots won by unanimous decision in their first fight, but left a bit to be desired. For Retrograde, they just couldn’t get around Mammoth. For Glitch, the usual drive gremlins.

For this fight, it seems like neither robot wanted to give away how to lead. Which makes less sense for Glitch, which doesn’t have extra armor on the back and would probably win weapon-to-weapon with Retrograde’s undercutter. Retrograde not knowing which way to lead makes a lot more sense, with two weapons and the idea of whipping the undercutter around a la Rotator. This did not work, as Glitch is too low to the ground. You just get mangled lifter forks that way, as Gruff found out earlier and as Retrograde found out now. This was going to have to be vert vs. undercutter for Retrograde.

Luckily the undercutter was working and getting real hits in on Glitch, which was also getting stuck on all the things. And that also meant that the more mobile Retrograde could continuously come around and get potshots here and there off Glitch, trying to get some points back after losing the forks so early. Taking an armor panel off’ll do that, and so will Retrograde’s undercutter getting to undercut and Glitch maybe not so mobile anymore, even by Glitch standards, like maybe Retrograde had gotten to a wheel.

On the other hand, Glitch followed up by definitely getting to a wheel, lopping one of Retrograde’s off. And then the other one. This is not fight over, however, since Retrograde has internal wheels. They’re clearly not as good though as the mobility’s clearly been reduced on the dual robot. But it’s still mobile enough for attacks on Glitch. This one went to the judges and it was definitely too close to call.

I wish I could actually view the fight, but through reports (and this being report of report) it sounds like Retrograde should have won control and aggression, damage would be close, probably edge to Glitch due to the weapon and wheel damage. So it’ll be close, but who would the judges go to?

Your answer? Glitch, by split decision. They better be mobile against Uppercut.

Glitch vs. Uppercut
Well, I guess this would be the top two seeds in this bracket. I mean, if I were to seed it, I’d go Uppercut 1, Glitch 2, Icewave 3, Mammoth 4, then Gruff, Free Shipping, Retrograde, Dragon Slayer? The bottom three’s interchangeable in my opinion. Free Shipping was the lone 0-3 but is better than the record says, and more importantly, moving things around so we didn’t get Uppercut-Free Shipping redux in the semis. But hey, it worked out in the end.

Both these bots have One Punch Bot levels of strength. For Glitch, they sometimes get to show it, but it involves them moving. If they get their drive sorted out, we could be seeing a monster in the making. Uppercut we already know. It’s almost surprising that the knockout artist hasn’t made the quarters yet. Winning a bounty and getting into the Golden Bolt tourney would help the belief that it’s on that level.

And Uppercut came out quick, though both bots got forks stuck in a killsaw slot. Man, widening the killsaws for pyrotechnic purposes and not telling anyone caused some problems, didn’t it? But Uppercut got the first glancing blow on Glitch.

But we saw why Uppercut hasn’t gotten to the next level as well, as again the gyroscopic forces worked against them, opening up a stabilizer for Glitch to clip off and make Uppercut even less stable. In terms of shapes these bots are the opposite, and the low and wide Glitch was making things tough on the taller, narrower Uppercut.

So they went weapon to weapon. And Glitch would have the advantage of shape there, with Uppercut bouncing around the BattleBox. Glitch even managed to take the bottom panel off of Uppercut, where you wonder if we’ll be seeing some electronics strewn about.

We didn’t because neither robot could move. Uppercut was locked up on one side, and Glitch got stuck in a killsaw slot. So guess what? It’s a double KO! This one goes to the judges.

Uppercut probably wins control, but damage has to be either 4-1 or 5-0 Glitch. Aggression could be pretty even. Still, that ends up becoming a split decision, with Lisa Winter and Derek Young again on the same side of the decision, for…

Glitch, which moves on to face Rotator.

Golden Bolt Qualifier
Glitch vs. Rotator
Rotator: 2-0, #6 seed, lost to Tantrum in round of 16

If there’s a bot that can take what Glitch is giving, it’s Rotator. It took Tombstone, it took three minutes of Valkyrie wailing on it, it took End Game. So Glitch better be able to stick and move.

Rotator went to spin up its undercutter blade, going with that instead of the overhead, but turned around forks first. Glitch wasn’t spinning up, presumably because they figured that would happen. The Victor Soto pivot strategy’s pretty well-known at this point. Rotator did turn around to get at the back of Glitch and popped itself up, bouncing around. The undercutter hit a seam or something, since we saw sparks here and there emanating from something, as Rotator came forward, then backed off upon realizing that weapon to weapon would be the definition of poor life choices. Rotator circled, and did go weapon to weapon in a glancing blow, then tried to go again and got a little too close to Glitch.

That was also a poor life choice, as Rotator was sent 10 feet in the air, halfway across the BattleBox, and its guts were hanging out.

What happened was, it did hit weapon to weapon, which bent Rotator’s weapon enough to shear off its own bottom plate. So like the HyperShock-Gigabyte hit, the force of the blow had the recipient manage to destroy itself. That’s what that green arcing was as well and the smoke.

I don’t think I need to say this, but yeah, fight over. Uh, Glitch is really good, you guys. Maybe the control problems are a feature, not a bug, like the Drunken Fist style.

Glitch wins by KO in 52 seconds and earns the sixth Golden Bolt slot.

Well, we didn’t see that coming. As for next week, another eight bots take on Skorpios. Which makes me think: considering the Golden Bolt tournament, this is gonna be a murderer’s row taking on Witch Doctor in the last one, isn’t it? After all, there isn’t a single quarterfinalist in the first three rounds, and seeing the bracket for Skorpios, we might want to buckle in soon.

But until then, we’ll see you next week!