Your Thursday Night NFL Football Open Thread

No doubt somebody is going to say that the Panthers (2-7) “are only one game out of second place!” and that silly person should be hung under a Banyon tree.

Newsy Notes:

-Oh Glory Be! The Commies are the subject of yet another investigation. Lil Danny Liar Face (I came up with that one all by meself) has now dragged the league and Goodell into the hot miasmatic mess that is this franchise! The sun shines a bit brighter today. (there was no mention of this on NFL.com’s front page. huh)

-It Gets Worse: Rumor has it out Vegas way that both Waller and Renfrow are being thrown on IR. The poor get poorer.

-So Many Buses: Pete Carroll was talking about how Geno and the OC are actually on the same page and that the former ‘doesn’t question everything’. I guess this also involved wearing a wristband of plays. Old Petey giving us a bit of insight on how things were while twisting the knife at the same time. Well done.

To The Game!

Falcons/Panthers:

-Apparently Hurricane Whatever is gonna make the field a slippery track so I’m thinking both squadoos stick the passing game even further down their back pockets.

-Didn’t these teams just play? Why yes, and they racked up 71 points between them so there’s a glimmer of hope.

-P.J. Walker, who threw for 317 yards in that game is the starter again but maybe not in the 2nd half if he struggles?

-Remember all those “Thunder and Lightning” backfields from back in the day? Well, Atlanta (third in rushing) with Patterson, Allgeier and Huntley (the lightest guy weighs 220) feature a “Fuck It, We’re Thunder X3, What Are You Gonna Do About It?” backfield.

-They all might have a day, what with Carolina being on short rest after getting gashed by Mojo Mixon.

Enjoy.

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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SonOfSpam

And unironically the lawsuits will be Whitey Whackers.

herodotus450

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ballsofsteelandfury

Man talk

Gumbygirl

I couldn’t watch the game because we were unable to cast it to my SIL’s tv. Sounds like I didn’t miss much.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It would be infinitely more interesting to watch a matchup between a real falcon and a real panther. Even if the falcon just said “nah, fuck this shit” and just flew away.

SonOfSpam

I’m no orinthologist but that seems like the right falcon move.

SonOfSpam

ornithologist you dumbass spelling is important

ballsofsteelandfury

Isn’t that what Atlanta did?

Brocky

I owe shanklor a sacrifice. My fantasy opponent was starting the falcons kicker.

SonOfSpam

Shankl’or (sp?) prefers the tips of the recently circumcised. So get on that.

Brocky

I’m 2-7 for a reason I guess

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The game’s over already? Am I the only one who noticed?

ballsofsteelandfury

I’m watching Goldfinger

Brocky

I saw goldfinger as a kid but I someone didn’t realize that version of James bond was the guy with the white beard from highlander.

I was young.

ballsofsteelandfury

I love the golf scenes.

herodotus450

Is that a Slazenger 7?

SonOfSpam

Was watching Goodfellas instead and had to look up “Pretend You Don’t See Her” because I forgot it was Jerry Vale and holy shit what a heartbreaking song.

Brick Meathook

dude likes her hat

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Redshirt

Welp, off to “The Rock”, which is a James Bond movie, despite what anyone tells me.

Brocky

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Redshirt

You cannot convince me that #76 isn’t a double-agent. No one can be that bad a pass blocking.

BugEyedBoo

Wife’s theory was that they just don’t like Mariotta.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Aw, but he seems so nice!

Redshirt

If niceness counts, Andy Dalton would be a five-time Super Bowl champion and I’d be married to a supermodel.

Redshirt

22-22 and 25-25 would be Scorigami. But of course, that would result in field goals and extra points being reached and SHANK’LOR has gained so much power this game alone, he may be able to take on Godzilla by MNF.

Col. Duke LaCross

HAIL SHAN’KHOR

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

ten episodes in and not a single light saber or use of The Force in Andor. I recommend this show unreservedly.

Redshirt

A Star Wars show without Star Wars? This sounds more like a Seinfeld plot than a Star Wars series.

Last edited 2 years ago by Redshirt
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It’s really good.

King Hippo

Of course, THIS is the week I finally benched Limey Duck

Sharkbait

Meanwhile on Twitter:

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Last edited 2 years ago by Sharkbait
WCS

To be fair, Musky is trying to contact OJ for tips right now.

King Hippo

Grimes is fucking a Jewish waiter, too?

Recovery Whiskey
herodotus450

People forget that the Edmund Fitzgerald was longer bow to stern than the depth of the water where she lays.

herodotus450

People also forget that the 20,000 Leagues in “20,000 Leagues Under the Sea” refers not to the depth but the forward choo-choo motion achieved by the submersible, presumably powered by some kind of monkey wearing rocket powered roller skates.

Brick Meathook

It was nuclear powered. Been there, done that.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

No, no, you’ve got this all wrong. It was jet-powered, monkey-navigated.

Last edited 2 years ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Redshirt

How did Atlanta win four games again?

King Hippo

Very sloppily

Sharkbait

Another panther FG and we’re in business

Recovery Whiskey

God damn ATL is bad

Game Time Decision

One could say that they are a hot mess

TheRevanchist

Matt Ryan maybe wasn’t the problem? Not the solution, either.

Redshirt

I am a complete fan to the White Bengals helmets, but these black Panther helmets are my favorites. They must become their official helmets faster than immediately.

Last edited 2 years ago by Redshirt
King Hippo

Co-signed. Is a pretty slick look.

Recovery Whiskey

This one?

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Recovery Whiskey

Shank’ lor speaks

Sharkbait

These missed PATs have me thinking a Scorigami might be in play.

King Hippo

I used to think Pitts must have fucked Arthur Smith’s daughter. But now I think it must have been his dog.

Recovery Whiskey
ballsofsteelandfury

Who is actually watching this mess?

King Hippo

I mean, the sound is off and playing Footy Manager on the other laptop. So….minimally I guess?

WCS

“Soap dispenser!”

— Trent G., “cooking” an old boot that isn’t his over a lamp without a bulb

Sharkbait

I just put it on. I’m playing the “Who will score more: the Falcons or the Rangers” game. The Rangers are winning by 5 at the moment.

Recovery Whiskey

Ditka reference, drink*

*I was already drinking

Last edited 2 years ago by Recovery Whiskey
ballsofsteelandfury

I’m actually drinking. It’s a good thing tomorrow is a day off

King Hippo

Yeah, being stuck at work hungover is a bitch

Recovery Whiskey

8 am meeting for me. I have a whole system of hangover recovery that usually works. My alcoholic grandparents are smiling down.

Sharkbait

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

We’re watching a different kind of mess – Nailed It!

King Hippo

Marcus Mariota should own that Florida license plate

King Hippo

Arthur Smith said BAD WORDS

Sharkbait

Is this game going just as well as the other Thursday games this season?

Recovery Whiskey

Best TNF I ever watched was during a tarmac delay in Houston watching the Hox and Tomsulas on my phone during a ground stop in IAH. You didn’t need this information. But TNF has never been as good since

Sharkbait

Was it the best because it was a good game? Or because it made the delay go by faster as a distraction?

Recovery Whiskey

Yes.

Recovery Whiskey

“You just don’t do this” says the guy that drunk-crashed his sportscar before banging on his inlaws door at 2 am

King Hippo

Experience- the greatest teacher imogodbless

Recovery Whiskey

Richard Sherman is a flawed yet at times brilliant individual.

Brick Meathook

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King Hippo

I mean, it’s FLORIDA so no doubt factually correct.

Recovery Whiskey

Could be 90 Day Fiance’ marathon

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Have you tried vacuuming? I find that it drowns out the volume of the television set.

Recovery Whiskey
King Hippo

Younghoe be all wet and shit

Recovery Whiskey

So much of this would have been called good football before the new concussion protocols

King Hippo

Can’t wait to see this Mariota 2-minute offense

Recovery Whiskey

You can really tell Al is just sleepwalking through this because it’s not on broadcast.

WCS

He’s reached professor emeritus at this point, and acting like every one I’ve been around.

Recovery Whiskey

“Without that effort” could sum up this broadcast as well

Horatio Cornblower

I think I left Carolina’s D in on my FF team. Oh well, good luck guys.

Horatio Cornblower

My first three draft picks were Jonathan Taylor, Javonte Williams, and Josh Allen.

I’m doing great.

WCS

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King Hippo

Looks like your subconscious did a good!

clint greasewood
Recovery Whiskey

Mickey’s Big Mouth was my first high school alcohol puke! Memories.

Last edited 2 years ago by Recovery Whiskey
Brick Meathook

In Living Color – BOLT 45 COMMERCIAL

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IlR-I57nmr4

Last edited 2 years ago by Brick Meathook
King Hippo

That show was genius, especially for its time

Mr. Ayo

DOINK!

King Hippo

You’d think a guy named Philip would throw more to Terrace

King Hippo

Charlotte really does have a pretty skyline. Hometown bias acknowledged.

litre_cola

Shit, am playing teh Hippo in freezer vodka lge. We have 3 players in this game.

We are in 8th and 11th which would explain that.

King Hippo

8th required a 4-week win streak, that’s how bad my crew be

King Hippo

Wonder how complex Al’s prop bets are tonight

JimU

Kyle Pitts with a rare reception.

clint greasewood
King Hippo

I am against Patterson in both leagues. At least I am doped up for the inevitable.

King Hippo

Nap was a mere 3 hours today, I must be re-gaining the will to live!

But probably not.

King Hippo

Consider tonight like kegel exercises for Sunday’s mandatory sentry duty.

Gatoraids

Definitely any fantasy interest in this game is a flex at best

litre_cola

Hear me out, know what would would be better than 2 Chainz? 3 Chainz.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JB2di69FmhE

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Followed by Ch4inz.

King Hippo

As opposed to 4chinz, aka Fatthew

litre_cola

What did you say? – B. Parcells

litre_cola

I am only here so Hippo doesn’t fine me.

SonOfSpam

Oxy fines are expensive.

litre_cola

I am aware.

RIP Oxipug.

herodotus450

Both teams are playing hard out there.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Apparently the Raiders released Jonathan Abram, which is irritating because now I’ll have to write him off of That’s My Raiders!

https://raiderramble.com/2022/11/08/johnathan-abram-reasons-raiders-released/

Brick Meathook

Keep him in as if he doesn’t realize he has been cut.

WCS

Josh McDaniels is capable of that.