Your Seattle/San Fran Wild Card Game Open Thread

Hey bettors, thinking about laying money on the Bills tomorrow? I stumbled upon this nugget during my wanderings-home teams favored by 9+ in the wild card round are 11-0. This stat goes back 30 years. Don’t say I never did anything for you.

To The Game!

Seahawks/Niners:

-Man It Up: Seattle will no doubt have noticed that in their week 15, 21-13 loss Purdy was 11/12 vs zone coverage but just 6/14 against man D.

-Another path to success for the Niners is to find a way to attack Jimmie Ward. He allows an 81%(!) catch rate against the folks he’s defending.

-The Niners swept the season series and home teams playing against a team for the third time are 14-9.

-I do like it when two stats dovetail into one another and it spells disaster for a team. Seattle’s D is 31st in surrendering yards after the catch while San Fran has once again led the league (six years running, btw) in that very same category. I’m guessing you’ll see big chunk plays and plenty of frustration on the faces of Seahawks defenders.

-Geno Needs To Hoof It: In recent losses Geno has run for 13, -1 and 2 yards. In victories he’s gained 38, 48 and 49 yards.

-Let’s Talk About The Weather: Their is a flood watch and a Wind Advisory in effect for Santa Clara at present. Though it’s expected to taper off this afternoon I’d expect some sloppy conditions.

-Rookie qb’s starting their first playoff game are 8-18. Those that have won include Russell Wilson, T.J. Yates(?), Sanchez, Flacco, Ben and Shaun King.

Enjoy the game and come out swinging!

 

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ThePirateSloth

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Recovery Whiskey

Single coverage to Metcalf. Yeah buddy

Petronel

Argh

Mr. Ayo

Imagine being the simpleton that thought 7th round rookie QB would win his first playoff game. What a rube you’d be.

litre_cola

He is against Geno Smith. Equal IMO

litre_cola

Smith throws td….

Mr. Ayo

Rubes, I say, rubes!

litre_cola

Is it wrong that during the fams two hour nap I am crushing wine, smoking weed, and a dart or two? I just don’t want my bad influences to show in person….other than wine drinking.

King Hippo

what is a dart (in terms of vice-induging)?

Doktor Zymm

I believe they are also referred to as ‘cigarettes’ being a sort of tiny cigar

King Hippo

ah, gracias

ballsofsteelandfury

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Col. Duke LaCross

Tanis is such a rocket.

Brick Meathook

Did that dude just get trapped in a flying outhouse in a tornado?

Doktor Zymm

LOL, Vegas had a prop bet on Deebo’s rushing yards – he hit it in the first 6 minutes of the game

litre_cola

One of my best buddies won a bunch on that.

ThePirateSloth

I’m breaking my not drinking much anymore because there’s zero chance I make it thru this game sober. I’m 6 beers deep now. Good times. Poor Mrs. Sloth is in for a drunk Pirate when she gets home.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I like Paul Giamatti as an actor, so it makes me happy to see him rake in big bucks from Verizon for doing that terrible ad.

Recovery Whiskey

Never should’ve let Wagner walk

litre_cola

His plumbing commercials were the best.

Recovery Whiskey

Stop Freakin’ Call Beacon

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Auch9FpDGfo

litre_cola

Oh yes, we are dialled in to your commercials up here.

Recovery Whiskey

That high step was Purdy

King Hippo

Purdy Mouth gots a little swag in him!

ThePirateSloth

Me at every Seahawks score:comment image

litre_cola

*everytime my resto gets truffles this is outside.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Fun fact: Chunk is now an entertainment lawyer, and Data is one of his clients.

ballsofsteelandfury

Koach K right now:

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litre_cola

Legit one of the coolest scenes ever.

King Hippo

they were gonna make me Offensive Coordinator for this
but I wasn’t even in their Army no MOAR…

Doktor Zymm

So looking like Lamar! is nawt gonna play. How fun would it be if he went to the Jets?

King Hippo

Aiyuk was an unsung FANTASY HERO, at least for Hippo

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

He helped me win the Gratuitous Simpsons References league!

King Hippo

No clean sheet for Santa Clara, BOO

Recovery Whiskey

From the Denver salt mine

King Hippo

We know [insert doomed coach here] will save us! DONKS WOO!!!!!

Recovery Whiskey

Got ourselves the illusion of a ballgame

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Casual viewers’ interest SUDDENLY REVIVED!

Mr. Ayo

HOX!!!!

Recovery Whiskey

Got ourselves an illusion of a competitive game!

King Hippo

Can’t believe they are still trying to make Fetchthe USFL happen.

Recovery Whiskey

With Trump not involved it could stand a chance. Just like last time.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’d argue the reverse. Having his cult hurl their life savings at the league to “own the libs” is the only thing that could keep it afloat.

LemonJello

Be right back, I have to put my Jaguras bandana(s) in the dryer so they’re clean and ready for tonight.

King Hippo

Which of the Jello clan did you get to join ya with the bandana thing? Or is your wing-wang JUST THAT LARGE?

LemonJello

Don’t know if I’m going with the teal, the alternate black/teal or the AFC South Champs bandana.

Also, yes.

Doktor Zymm

Don’t forget the anti-static dryer sheet!

King Hippo

Confession Time – I very much get Nick and Joey Bosa a….confused

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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ThePirateSloth

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Last edited 1 year ago by ThePirateSloth
The Maestro

What’s up dicksmokes??

Lady Maestro is in Scottsdale for a work conference this weekend so I am bachin’ it up again here (and by bachin’ it up, I mean mostly work through the to-do list of work and house stuff that seems to be growing by the hour). At least I’ve got the games on to feel better about my productivity getting derailed for the rest of the day!

So here’s something that has somewhat broken my brain, having just learned it today: apparently Lady Maestro has a coworker at this conference, a woman in her late 50s/early 60s ish, who has apparently TATTOOED-ON EYEBROWS INSTEAD OF HAIR. Have I been living under a rock? This is the first I’ve ever heard of anybody doing such a thing. Clearly it’s not very common… but have any of you ever seen this before?? I feel like I’m taking crazy pills.

Petronel

I know someone who has tattooed eyebrows, but because she lost her eyebrows to chemo and they never grew back.

The Maestro

OK, this seems like a very reasonable explanation, actually. Apparently the example ones I was told about today are a vibrant electric blue – which makes less sense.

King Hippo

is it an alopecia or post-chemo thing? Otherwise, yeah…that seems odd,

ThePirateSloth

It IS common.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It’s not *common* but it’s certainly not uncommon.

ThePirateSloth

It really is common:comment image

Doktor Zymm

Oh yeah, that’s a thing. It’s more common in the Hispanic community, but really all sorts of people have been doing it since the 80s or 90s. Not just eyebrows either, any sort of tattoo makeup, eyeliner, blush, etc

Doktor Zymm

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ballsofsteelandfury

We know what you mean

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fleshwound_NPG

23% on third down, how in gods green earth did petey get into the playoffs

Recovery Whiskey

CHEATED.

Mr. Ayo

We’re on to the draft!

2Pack

Can we please start getting some coach Pete unhappy on the sideline shots. I enjoy those.

Recovery Whiskey

Just ask him what was up with Building 7

ballsofsteelandfury

I have to say that I’m not a big fan of the Niners but DAMN those are beautiful uniforms! Best looking unis in the league, I think.

fleshwound_NPG

a lowkey criminal act that that went away from them in the 90s

not shocking the dynasty ended the moment they did (even if they won in 94)

Petronel

The white pants we had for a while were…not good. Red and gold is the way.

Doktor Zymm

A well-executed gold just looks stellar. There are some Washington throwbacks that are pretty fantastic too, with actual burgundy and gold

litre_cola

did not know you were from what Cecil would call Arabia. Gold rules eyes.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

You mean “NFC”, right?

King Hippo

DET would have been more fun, but…I don’t think any of the field was beatng Baby Shanny’s crew this round. Or any round before they play in Philly (if they do).

ballsofsteelandfury

I think the Niners are your NFC Super Bowl representative.

King Hippo

Agreed. But Iggles away would at least be a fight.

Recovery Whiskey

Chuckles in draft picks.. yep more fun for sure

Brick Meathook

They should show stuff like Apple’s headquarters or something, not the Golden Gate bridge.

Actually, this game is sort of Mac vs PC

ballsofsteelandfury

I’d show Gilroy and a cone of garlic ice cream.

Recovery Whiskey

How about some hobos begging on the on-ramp to the 101

Petronel

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Last edited 1 year ago by Petronel
Doktor Zymm

Great America is RIGHT THERE

fleshwound_NPG

bad feeling this whole weekend is gonna be these games

Petronel

WOOP

fleshwound_NPG

big cock brock should not have to throw more than 12 times

Recovery Whiskey

GAME MANAGER

King Hippo

That Santa Clara defense is legit scary. NFC better hold onto its buttholes.

litre_cola

Did you know that they throw fish in Seattle?

ONLY PLACE IN AMERICA WITH SEAFOOD

Doktor Zymm
ballsofsteelandfury

We’re all here just to see something crazy while the Niners beat the Seahawks, right?

Does anyone actually think the Hawks have a shot to win?

Recovery Whiskey

Puncher’s chance.

fleshwound_NPG

the rain apparently is doing the same to big cock brock as it did to lance

Doktor Zymm

I think the rain helps them, but still a longshot

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’m not watching, someone wake me if it gets interesting

ballsofsteelandfury

They’re showing the Golden Gate Bridge even though it’s 40 miles away from the stadium.

fleshwound_NPG

feel like we haveta break out the NOTEBOOK already

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I figured you were a big McAdams fan

fleshwound_NPG

apparently, i have two dfo accounts and wp stole my av on that one

litre_cola

Welcome back?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“And what is the purpose of this so-called ‘notebook’?” – Lea Michele

ballsofsteelandfury

To draw pictures, silly!

Doktor Zymm

Good start!

Friend of mine was Tiger Parenting the Niners the other day:
“You could really stand to improve your secondary”
“Mom! I’m the best defense in the NFL!”
“Yes, but you could be better if you just beefed up your secondary!”

ballsofsteelandfury

Was the Mom Asian?

Doktor Zymm

Indian man, but I just like the mental audio of the 49rs defense saying ‘Mom’ in a protesting manner 😛

ballsofsteelandfury

That fits the stereotype too.

King Hippo

Woke up exactly in time for a pee and then KICKOFF. Hippo content. LET’S GO TOMSULAS!!

litre_cola

Day drunk woooooo.

Smokin ribs with wee man. He has had 2 milkshakes, he is BC Dick’s blood.

Doktor Zymm

What’s the line on how many ribs wee man is gonna eat? I’ll take the over

litre_cola

Ok, it is nap time. (Aka Cotes du Rhone and weed time) There are 3 racks in there. Mrs Cola from working n the bone maro cancer clinic is not down. She gets smoked chicken breast.

I reckon the 5 year old eats a rack an a half. So that means I also get a rack and a half. He is 4’9, I am 6’2…….

ballsofsteelandfury

You’re not watching Puebla??

litre_cola

We won last night, am happy

Petronel

LET’S GOOOOOOO

Doktor Zymm

I am 100% with you today!
Let’s give Trent Williams a playoff win!

Doktor Zymm

Good job making the seats red so it’s not as obvious how empty the stadium is!

Recovery Whiskey

The ol St Louis Cardinals look

Col. Duke LaCross

There’s a lot going on with Daryl Johnston’s coat.

Doktor Zymm

If Purdy wins this game, do you think he’ll undisputedly be the leagues best Brock?

litre_cola

+1 Bomber legend.

Recovery Whiskey

“He’ll never be as popular at Stanford as me” – Brock Turner

Doktor Zymm

The cheap seats in Santa Clara are down to $58, which is insane for a playoff game. If I could feasibly get there via public transit I would totally go, but not willing to pay $50 to park 2 miles away

Recovery Whiskey

Doesn’t CalTrain go right by Levi’s though?

Last edited 1 year ago by Recovery Whiskey
Doktor Zymm

CalTrain doesn’t go to the East Bay

Doktor Zymm

The best way would probably be to drive down to Milpitas, then park and take VTA in, but that’s still a pain in the butt

Recovery Whiskey

Ahha I see your problem

Doktor Zymm

It is SOGGY out here. Most recent forecast is saying it’ll start raining again off and on around 2 pm with 100% of the area receiving rain at 3. It was heavy overnight and has been off and on all morning. My impression of Californians as total weather wusses has been amply confirmed by the assholes going 40 mph on the highway with their flashers on when I only occasionally needed to use the medium windshield wiper setting.

Petronel

Been a long time since I’ve felt a Bay Area winter, but I can still remember the damp smell of the MUNI buses come February.

Doktor Zymm

This is definitely the rainiest it’s been since I moved here, my car is so clean! I’m glad I don’t live closer to the bay, there’s all sorts of sewage backups with old systems in poor condition that probably weren’t designed for this much water in the first place.

Public transit ridership is still low after Covid, and now they’ve gotten on the spiral of cutting frequencies because there aren’t riders then people stopping riding because there aren’t trains often enough.

ballsofsteelandfury

It’s been raining pretty steady in LA since about 10 this morning.

I’m not going anywhere for two days.

Last edited 1 year ago by ballsofsteelandfury
Recovery Whiskey

Seattle brought the rain with them!! Narratives

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

FUCK. AND. YES.

Last edited 1 year ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Doktor Zymm

Good for him!

LemonJello

Karousing Koach Kliff, artist’s interpretation:

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Gatoraids

Coach Kliff renacting all the lyrics of Passage to Bangkok on the way

Sharkbait

Bangkok, Oriental setting
And the city don’t know that the city is getting

Gumbygirl

I get my kicks above the waistline, sunshine.

litre_cola

I knew I liked him

Recovery Whiskey

Nevertheless

Last edited 1 year ago by Recovery Whiskey
ballsofsteelandfury

That needs to be a post

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