Hello there fellow DFO’er.  Hope you’re well today.  And thanks for coming back to see last weeks comments of the week as decided by my brain.  There’s no reason as to why some comments make it and others don’t. Seriously. There isn’t.

This weeks cheesy motivational quote is:
The best inheritance a parent can give his children is a few minutes of his time each day [in bed].
Orlando Aloysius Battista

Don’t skip nap time folks. You’ll be rested and the kid will figure things out on their own. Taking the high road on this one.

As a reminder, Sunday comments stand alone and Monday comments will go on the next week’s post.

Note that during the offseason, I’ll probably look at the Sunday posts.

Without further ado, here are the comments of the week.

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“Redshirt in bed.” – my ex-girlfriend [ on bad endings]
Redshirt

Well, Horatio did ask for fictional sources…
scotchnaut

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“How I Met Your Mother”. Spend 8.917 seasons building up the Mother, showing Ted and Robin are better as friends, and setting up Barney and Robin as an ideal Beta Couple, only to shove mommy in the fridge and pair Ted and Robin because why the hell not.
Redshirt

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Have you had an attorney look into Social Security disability for your [Alex] spinal injury?
King Hippo

More importantly do you have any pills for your spinal injury that you’re not currently using?
Horatio Cornblower

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That’s about five times as much as I accomplished during the entirety of the COVID lockdown, so I certainly won’t be looking down my nose at you. But Horatio’s right – walk those dogs!
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Oh. Saw your comment below. Um…take those dogs recumbent biking?
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Hook the dogs up to the bike and have them pull it like a sled in the Iditarod. I see no way this ends badly.
Horatio Cornblower

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“Oh, sure, but when I explore these kinds of options it suddenly means I’m racist.” – Jerry Jones, upon reading the headline “Brady agrees to terms to become minority owner”
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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Brady as an owner of the Raiders means we should all call Rikki this week to make sure he’s okay
TheRevanchist

Having Tommy drop by as the new landlord in future That’s My Raiders episodes is going to be great.
Mr. Ayo

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And Essendon pulls off the miracle finish to get the win against…a 3-5 team and get back to .500.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Sharkbait

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Evening folks

2Pack

Mike Glennon’s younger brother in high school?
WCS

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I want an emotional support Capybara so bad.
litre_cola

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Think I’m going to go see a Bears game this year while they’re still in Soldier instead of the soul-killing suburbs. The Bears are soul-killing enough without help from a dismal location
Doktor Zymm

Perhaps you should give “Applebees, Brought To You By Home Depot In Partnership With Roto-Rooter Stadium” a chance? Just sayin’.
scotchnaut

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Me, to wife: “Hey, Tina Turner passed away”
Wife: “Aw, that’s too bad.”
Wife, singing: “Simply the best”
Me, singing: “Deader than all the rest”

She may leave me, but it waas worth it.
SonOfSpam

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That’s 12 straight Eastern Conference Final games lost by the Vichy Whalers
Sharkbait

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Don T

What’s undead can’t be killed.
WCS

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Mrs. Horatio: “Hey, I just realized this errand I’m running has me right near that brewery you like, Treehouse or something. If you want to order some beer I’ll pi…”

Me: “The order will be ready at 11:50. The pick-up for cans is all the way in the back. it’s paid for, just make sure you have your ID, and maybe grab a hand truck.”
Horatio Cornblower

“Oh, and maybe get a little something for the dwarf?”
LemonJello

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THIS WORDPRESS I CALL IT A GRANDPARENT WITH ALZHEIMER’S BECAUSE IT HAS A LOT OF TROUBLE REMEMBERING ME AND HAS BEEN KNOWN TO SHIT THE BED ON OCCASION
BrettFavresColonoscopy

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Don T

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Me, going to the restaurant/bar for dinner: “I’ve had over 40 beers, (hop fest samples, mostly), this week. I’m going to stick to water tonight and wait for the actual weekend.

Awesome Bartender Jen: “Hey, I just fucked up and poured the wrong beer for a customer. You want this Counterweight for free?”

Me: “Everything that happens the rest of the night is on you, Jesus. Gimme that free beer.”
Horatio Cornblower

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I have too much fun in Chicago, it’s probably healthy I don’t live here anymore, but enjoying my visits to the full
Doktor Zymm

Awesome Bartender Jen, (see above), is going to Chicago tomorrow. She told us she is going to “raw dog Chicago,” so there’s something to keep an eye out for.
Horatio Cornblower

Raw dogging Chi**** = leaving the Lipitor at home
Don T

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This just in

2Pack

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I think gold diggers get a bad rap. Unjustly. If an elderly wants to dote on whorish individuals, so what? It’s transactional, win – win.
Then again, spending all the inheritance is one of my fave variations of fuck them kids.
Don T

Fuck them kids is the Penn St motto if memory serves me correct.
litre_cola

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It’s a lovely day for some doomed dirt ball!

Doktor Zymm

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THIS DEANDRE “NUK” HOPKINS I CALL HIM ASHLII BABBITS BOWELS SHORTLY AFTER ARRIVING TO THE WASHINGTON HOSPITAL CENTER WITH A BULLET WOUND TO HER LEFT SHOULDER BECAUSE HE HAS BEEN RELEASED!
blaxabbath

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“WOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!”

[runs through clubhouse with a Celtics bandana wrapped 3/4 of the way around his wing-wang] – Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Excuse me, sir, I believe we are all patiently waiting for a story …
ballsofsteelandfury

Forget it Balls; it’s Beantown.
Horatio Cornblower

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My son is power-washing his outboard boat after catching several pike earlier today. He’s blasting C&W tunes and Eddie Rabbit’s “Driving My Life Away” is currently playing.*

*currently debating whether there was a specific point where I failed as a parent or if it was cumulative. I’m leaning towards the latter.
scotchnaut

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DR. MRS. DEADLY: [calling in from Pasadena] I think I left my wallet at home. Can you look around for me?

RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY: [spends ten minutes hunting around the house at her increasing frantic direction]

DR. MRS. DEADLY: Oh, never mind, I’m an idiot, it’s right here, I have it.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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Weber grilled ribeyes, potatoes, bell peppers and zucchini done and consumed. So grillin dun – chillin begun.

2Pack

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Noodles, saying hello

King Hippo

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Between Pickford, Mina, and Tarkowski….you don’t want to have a bar fight with Everton!

Grandson Noodles came and sat with me moments after the goal. Taking that as a sign from God.

Eat shit, Lester!!
King Hippo

If Noodles is your grandson, it’s no wonder Seamus was your friend.
WCS

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The Bulk Barn is also a Canadian gym franchise that caters to obese farmers that want to shed some weight.
scotchnaut

When referring to Canadians, Isn’t “obese farmers” redundant?

-I have American farming family in North Dakota
LongtimeLionsLoser

ballsofsteelandfury

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Just out of curiosity I scrolled back and researched. Not counting travelogs, and guest hosts*, I’ve had 221 actual cooking episodes of Sunday Gravy over nine seasons. Some of the episodes even surprised me.

I already cooked that?

* guest hosts include Our own Game Time Decision, DJ TAJ – several times including a two week stint while I recovered from my 5th knee surgery-, Balls of steel and fury, Low Commander of the Super Soldiers, Why Eagles Why, and Old School Zero.

Kind of blew my own mind scrolling back through all of that.
yeah right

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Thanks for all the comments and funny and everything else.

Stay busy and safe out there.

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