Not-Yet Chilly October Nights – JV NFL-palooza

I hope the early fixtures amused and/or delighted you.  Here’s a 2nd helping, getting up limbered up for tomorrow’s MANDATORY 14 hours of NFL glory.

Ballsy:  I’m back! I do not guarantee attendance at tomorrow’s mandatory Footy. I will do my best, Mr. Hippo, but I needs my beauty sleep!

Kenfucky (+14.5) at Georgia (7:00, ESPN)

Prove It week again for the Blue Moons, between the hedges against a vulnerable Jawja squad.  Kenfucky never, ever capitalizes on circumstances like this.  But this seems like waaaayyyyy too many points, and I feel like UGA just might see its luck run out this week.  Thanks in advance for the Cats making me look like a dumbass.

Ballsy: I always read Hippo’s “Jawja” as “Jawa” and that gets me thinking of Jabba The Hut and that gets me thinking of this:

Which leads to

And then I forget what we were talking about.

Michigan (-19.5) at Minnesota (7:30, NBC)

Really hope for something, ANYTHING to shake things up in the B1G.  But one suspects we will be waiting for 2024 on that front (all the new “middle class” teams).

Ballsy: USC is going to come visit you in North Carolina and take away your pills if you call them middle class again. Go ahead, USC DARES YOU!

Fresno State (-6) at Wyoming (8:00, Fox)

This is Wyoming’s SECOND network TV, primetime showcase.  They beat Guns Up! in a CBS-aired thriller, now they get a chance to ruin Fresno’s Cinderella run.  Looking forward to a tough, physical battle.

Ballsy: Our local Fresno State fan will let us know if the Bulldogs will cover. These Bulldogs are much cooler than the Jabba The Hut kind, but are their cheerleaders hotter? You decide!!

Texas Tech (-1.5) at Baylor (8:00, ESPN2)

Sometimes, you just need to highlight a fun, shootout-type game.  This is one of those nights (plus the cheerleaders).

Ballsy: You said cheerleaders? Also, FUCK YEAH cowboy boots!

Oregon State (-9.5) at Cal (10:00, PAC-12)

Again with the PAC-12 network bullshit.  The only even slightly watchable Tweaker Fixture, no less.  Cal is a tougher out than usual, and Niiiiiiiice Beaver could use a “no drama” road win.

Ballsy: I guess the Beavs are trying to drive up the value of the PAC 12 Network before it becomes their and Washington State’s property? Good luck with that!

/ checks box on “post armpit fetish pic” row

// closes “DFOTODO list.xlsx”

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King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
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ballsofsteelandfury

That was a crazy ending

Last edited 1 year ago by ballsofsteelandfury
Brick Meathook

Dang USC! OT2? I had the sound down!

Mr. Ayo

This wouldn’t happen if I was there. Just saying.

Brick Meathook

I’ve got a weather board down below (assembled in Photoshop) that I don’t see enough likes. Just sayin . . .

Mr. Ayo

If you could slide a little Seattle tile in there, that might help.

Brick Meathook

It ain’t SoCal but I’ll see what I can do

ballsofsteelandfury

I gave a +1!

Last edited 1 year ago by ballsofsteelandfury
Brick Meathook

I know! Thanks!

Brick Meathook

My posts have the most effort behind them but get the the least likes.

Try clicking the “like” button once in a while. I know you’re out there.

My content is all free, mostly tests, lots of man hours, I just want a Neilson score.

https://vimeo.com/715267604?share=copy

Mr. Ayo

Just post up some Achwood strips. Those are always a big hit around these parts.

Brick Meathook

Honestly, what is your deal with Achewood? If you don’t like it just ignore it. You act like it sexually assaulted you.

Mr. Ayo

I’m just trying to get your +1s ups. I’m here to help, man.

Brick Meathook

We’re going to meet one day, Ayo. And I’ve got a present for you, because I’m a cool guy like that. I’m either going to give you an Achewood book or else a decent manual on engine lubrication principles and practices.

Mr. Ayo

Can’t wait!

Brick Meathook

Betcha can’t! Now go down the line here and let’s see some +1s

Brick Meathook

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Mr. Ayo

You got it buddy!

ballsofsteelandfury

Hey, I +1ed the weather board!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Found a funny:

Well, if there really are Jewish space lasers, we’re about to see ’em.

ballsofsteelandfury

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Brick Meathook

Okay folks, one last look at the DFO SoCal Weather Board!

Well now, who’s chillin’ and who’s illin’?

Glendale, Pasadena, and Anaheim have finally achieved beach weather. The Inland Empire just can’t let go of that heat, but Peedro looks quite nice.

And Playa is practically Stalingrad right now. Dammit I’m wearing shorts!

Thanks for playing and remember to drink heavily for a better life. See ya!

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ballsofsteelandfury

I need to go outside now. It’s hot inside the house!

Brocky

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Needs more Stephen Miller as Salacious B. Crumb.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

And Steve Bannon as this guy.

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Last edited 1 year ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
ballsofsteelandfury

OMG that’s so good!

WCS

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Senor Weaselo

You don’t smell like a peasant, you don’t dress like a peasant, and you’re certainly not on fire like a peasant!

SonOfSpam

I feel like there’s a “When Keeping It Real Goes Wrong” thing here.

herodotus450

7) Miami crowd immediately throws trash on the field

Brocky

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That…. is not an accurate headline

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Happy Notre Dame Schadenfreude Day!

I’d like to also point out that the real Fightin’ Irish won 36-14 today.

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Horatio Cornblower

Nice showing, you mangy Scot gits.

Mr. Ayo

A truly incredible choke job

Brick Meathook

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Horatio Cornblower

Fat Guy INT!

Not even close to a TD. You expect that man to run 50 yards!?

Horatio Cornblower

Sundial my ass, you need a calendar to time that man’s 40.

And I love him for it.

yeah right

Made some chicken tinga enchiladas today.
Little beans on the side.

Living Pedro life, Holmes

clint greasewood

I can’t close this one out

THIS NOTRE DAME I CALL HAMAS BECAUSE THEY ARE RELIGIOUS EXTREMIST THAT…

Brick Meathook

With this loss Notre Dame moves up to #8

Brick Meathook

Somebody didn’t say their prayers before the game.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I love when defenders are angry with themselves for dropping fourth-down interceptions which would have actually dealt their team *worse* field position if they had caught it.

Last edited 1 year ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Brick Meathook

Touchdown Notre Dame!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“A correctly called penalty against Notre Dame that negates a big play? Oh, that referee is going to wake up with a coathanger in his bed tomorrow morning…” – a very angry Amy Coney Barrett

jjfozz

So I walk into the basement today.

My 15 year old is sitting with his friends.

It’s 1 pm.

“Why is there an open beer on the table?”

“Oh, that’s from last night.”

I pick up the beer. It’s ice cold.

I’m doomed.

SonOfSpam

Did you teach them a lesson by shotgunning it?

jjfozz

I have to hand it to him, he is an expert in shotgunning.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

As punishment you should make him watch two full episodes of Emily In Paris. And of course to ensure he actually watches them you’re going to have to chaperone.

Sharkbait

Mrs sharkbait is deep into that now. Its…something

Horatio Cornblower

Maybe tell your kid that if he gets drunk in your house at 15 and one of his friends gets hurt as a result he has financially fucked his entire family, because I promise you that not only do you do not have insurance that covers underage drinking in your house but that I’ve handled cases with injuries resulting from that underage drinking that you do not want to know about, that will get through to him.

jjfozz

I covered that, extensively, and loudly with him. I know that post sounded like it was being treated lightly, but I was fucking pissed.

jjfozz

I know people on Facebook, and I would block them, but they’re such assholes that I enjoy seeing their posts.

jjfozz

My knees shouldn’t hurt this bad at my age. Fuck.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

You should make a deal with the universe that if your knees feel better tomorrow, you promise to watch an episode of Emily in Paris and write it up for DFO.

ballsofsteelandfury

I said it before and I’ll say it again.

Some people want to watch the world burn and others want to vacuum it.

jjfozz

Good God – I can only go so far.

Brick Meathook

It could be a classic, like Balls hate-watching Love, Actually and blogging it.

yeah right

If you need knee advice I’m right here.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Right where You’re kneeded

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Ha ha, I knee what you mean!

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jjfozz

It’s been chronic my whole life. I had Osgood-Schlatter disease when I was 13, add in sports, drunken falls, and nasty ass genetics, and you gotta deal with it.

Plus, there’s always bourbon and heroin

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I knew a kid with the last name Osgood when I was a kid. One time he was riding on someone’s back bike pegs and slipped off and landed crotch-first on the spinning tire and tore his sac. He had to go to the emergency room and everything. They sewed him back up and he was okay, though.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Man, I don’t want to have to get up at 4 a.m. to watch rugby tomorrow, but that’s the only interesting game (Argentina vs. Japan, basically a playoff game).

jjfozz

Arrival was excellent, but you know Amy Adams could have shown a little more skin…

yeah right

For Don_T or “Stagger Lee if you will…”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m463sDOYxPY

Sharkbait

Hey Washington State

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SonOfSpam

Bruins’ defense is legit. WATCH OUT 2024 RUTGERS!

Mr. Ayo

I’ve got one thumb, two turntables, and a microphone.

Where I’m at!

Gumbygirl

Bottles AND cans!

Gumbygirl

I was flipping through the channels and I blew past my Blazers because they were wearing weird uni’s!

SonOfSpam

And Lillard’s gone to Milwaukee.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

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Gumbygirl

Not those Blazers.