Instant Hippo Thoughts – Wild Card Saturday (2023 Season)

I don’t really have much to say – but what the hell.  A Sunday morning placeholder, I guess!

NBC’s matinee was a pretty compelling football match, for about 35 minutes of play.  #ThePauls even led 14-10 in Q2!  I know, it was cray.  Back and forth, and it looked pretty even.  But then the 500s re-took the lead, and got a stop.  They were able to successfully milk the last 5 and change before half AND convert for 7.  Houston led 24-14, and would receive the opening kick in Q3.  The scene was set for a kill shot.

CJ Stroud had other 230 yards passing in the first half, and both squadrons got explosive plays downfield, from both starting and backup TEs.  I expected the aforementioned kill shot, and was a bit surprised when Houston had to punt.  Perhaps we still could have game?

Uh, no.  Kill shot delayed was NOT kill shot denied, as back to back Pick Sixes ensued.  Coldblooded rookie Stroud sank his teeth into the jugular on the late Q3/early Q4 drive, for the insurmountable 45-14 lead.  The game went into mutually agreed walkon time, earlier than any playoff game I can recall this century.  45-14 it would end, no MOAR fairytale for Mr. Elite.  Still one hell of a ride, though.  When you meet a buzzsaw, shit just happens.

Next, we fire up the tablet to stream Fins Sticks/Chefs on Peacock.  At least the quality was good, and I already subscribed for Premier League footy.  Cris even chickened out!  Princeton Red ain’t much of an upgrade, but really – he was tolerable last night.

Things I surely did not expect – placement men going 5/5 in the first half.  That’s an extra point each, and THREE Buttkicker FGs.  Mahomes had significantly better passing numbers, aside from the jump ball prayer TD that Tyreek reeled in.  Andy Reid was (somewhat predictably) WAY too cute with his playcalling, rather than giving Pacheco 40 touches off-tackle.  But medium slant/cross routes to Rashee Rice were also working, and it mostly bled the LOLfin secondary to death.

A goshdarned FOURTH placement made it 19-7.  Nothing else happened Q3, aside from Mahomes’ helmet cracking (no, not THAT helmet, Mrs. Mahomes).  By now, everyone just wanted to go home, but they made ’em finish the game out.  I quit paying attention at 26-7, though.  Pacheco got to get a score, bully FOAR him.

Sadly, no football until 4:30 on Fox (Cowpersons/Packers), followed by the Fatthew Vengeance game in Detroit (8:00, NBC).  But really…isn’t Baby Buster the one who should feel aggrieved?  Fatthew just asked for a trade, and it was granted.  Where does the vengeance come in?  I wanted to see Mad Max – Snowmageddon Edition in WNY, but I guess at least we get an MLK doubleheader.  Hydrate/nap accordingly.

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King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ok I’ve made my guacamole for the afternoon game and prepped my broccoli and carrots to go with the steak and baked potato I’m going to make for dinner tonight. Let’s do this shit.

Brick Meathook

As part of a healthy low fat diet, I scrambled three large eggs with a dash of Herbes de Provence, a splash of half & half, and a pinch of baking powder, served atop 100% whole wheat toast generously slathered with fresh creamery butter. A cup of coffee and small glass of pineapple juice assisted on the side. The healthy part? All of it.

Doktor Zymm

Funny how no one mentioned this during the broadcast yesterday.

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Horatio Cornblower

Well at least the Browns got…bounced out in the first round of the play-offs using a QB who had been retired at the beginning of the season. So they’ve got that going for them.

2Pack

This would be great…

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Doktor Zymm

I’m in!

Doktor Zymm

And now my new flight is delayed to the time of my original flight, but I’m already on the way to the airport so I guess I will be watching the Obnoxious Bowl at the airport

yeah right

What kind of fucked up football Sunday is this?

Cecil Rhodes

Greetings fellows! The child labourers of Mozambique are on the verge of a historic triumph over the Pharaohs of Ancient Egypt (who have their Redshite talisman in the squad) in the Dark Continent Euros! A fine achievement for a nation that has a Human Development Index below 0.45 — it can only go up from here!

litre_cola

BeIn televised it here

scotchnaut

I don’t like them at all but I can understand if a sportsperson that makes millions gets one-he/she doesn’t have to go out into the workforce and try to get a job.

/god, I sound so old

Doktor Zymm

If I ever get a neck tattoo it will 100% be “I steal from petty cash” in gothic lettering

litre_cola

By God that’s the Shame Pizza alarm!!!

Also, we can put a man on the moon but not make proper frozen pizza

Horatio Cornblower

‘We welcome you to Hartford, Connecticut!” sounds vaguely threatening.

Senor Weaselo

To this day I have no idea how I wasn’t jumped walking from U. Hartford to the train station when I did my Master’s audition there. The only answer is “it was January.”

Horatio Cornblower

Holy Christ. I don’t have a lot of sympathy for people who are afraid of urban areas, most of them are not that bad, but that is not a route I’d describe as “safe for walking without having a rifle platoon to accompany you.”

Next time let me know and I’ll give you a ride.

litre_cola

Spuds are all over Men Untied

Horatio Cornblower

Getting ready to kick back and watch UConn do things to Georgetown that most* people wouldn’t do to a farm animal, with the likely #1 ranking available.

*analogy does not apply in Arkansas

Doktor Zymm

Switched flights so I can catch most of the evening tilt instead of the afternoon one (which I might still be able to watch part of on the plane).

WCS

I just want a big bowl of coffee for lunch. Is that asking too much?

Doktor Zymm

Seems like not asking all that much at all really

Fronkenshteen
ballsofsteelandfury

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WCS
litre_cola

African Euros available on teeeveee, not Asia Euros. Dats raycess!

litre_cola

Tis available on YouTube for gratis. The whole tourney

Doktor Zymm

Unless the Tomlin voodoo is extra strength we should see Texans @ Ravens next week which should be excellent, and KC @ Bills which has a track record of being excellent so at least them’s some good matchups

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I just want for Mahomes to have to play a playoff game on the road. For ONCE.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Let’s see if this gif of Caroline Munro can dispel my dread and cheer me up.

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It worked!

2Pack

How can it fail?

Doktor Zymm

It is too bad I am ready for some football because there isn’t any for hours and hours until it’s time for me to go to the airport

litre_cola

Back to SF?

Doktor Zymm

Yup, I could have scheduled it for this morning, but figured sleeping in and then catching the early playoff games in Chicago including a snow game, possibly with company, would be better than getting up early and catching the late playoff games in Cali where my TV watching setup isn’t quite as good, but then the stupid wussy NFL ruined my plans

Fronkenshteen

Think your boys have a smash and grab in them now that Beto is on, Hippo?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Despite my best efforts I am simply unable to decipher the series of grunts and squeals that the subhuman pig-men of the Kansas City region use to communicate with one another. I assume they are expressing some kind of joy?

Senor Weaselo

Senorita Weaselo is at a student concert for one of the places she teaches at.

I am expecting screaming about one of the students who can’t count, and they’re playing Suzuki Book 4, so you’d imagine that they can count that high.

Fronkenshteen

I hate most commercials like poison, but always tip my hat when I see advertising I think is of real quality. That being said, I think those musical “Don’t make ‘Future-You’ hate ‘You'” investment commercials are fantastic.

Don T

I love LOVE this commercial. Think it’s my fave
https://youtu.be/xIoW6IpicgQ?si=SGBqxLO4D6JBLwRS

Fronkenshteen
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I always thought this one was fantastic.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DcfW_hlYZ5k

BugEyedBoo
Doktor Zymm

Other than eating too much pizza and having horrible taste in men, past me is a good egg

Don T

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2Pack

I was getting a little tired of the TS and gurls luxury box celebration shots late in the game. Felt like sicking Joan and the thug chicks on them. That cat fight would be must see TV.

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Horatio Cornblower

Lita Ford would clean house.

Don T

I skipped a party to watch 4.5 quarters of interesting playoff fitbaw. That’s time well spent, fuck you normies.

Fronkenshteen

You might be having a rough morning, but James Tarkowski of Everton is currently having his eyebrow GLUED back together on the field.

Redshirt
Don T

I figured it out: DeSantis acts with the clueless and feigned humanity than the vampires on What We Do in the Shadows (tv). Still, tall order to say he’s worse than Trump at anything, I think.

Don T

sub “of” for “than” and yeah 🤪

Senor Weaselo

He’s worse than Trump at doing the crimes? Give him time, though, and he could get there.