Your Week 15 Sunday NFL Football Open Thread

Welp, these will be brief because today is a regular work day. Don’t shed a tear, it’s for the greater good. (The Greater Good) I’ll be free and clear for FOUR complete days, which almost never happens. Every team is playing but somehow there’s only one game that grabs me by the crotch. Nice going, Shield.

To The Games!

Falcons/Giants:

Oh no, ATL is on the road, how will they ever win? Penix gets the start and he’ll be airing it out because he has a much bigger arm than Cousins. London and Mooney should be able to get behind the Giants cb’s just like everyone else has.

Lions/Bears:

Chicago would appear to be cannon fodder as Detroit looks to get right after last week’s loss.

Browns/Bengals:

Burrow is going to be a lovely trivia question a few years from now. It’ll go along the lines of, “Which player threw X amount of yards and Y amount of TD’s and didn’t win MVP?”

Titans/Colts:

Are you up for a punting exhibition?

Rams/Jets:

LA’s offense seems to have found another gear and I hope the Jets get humiliated. Their once respectable defense has given up the ghost and following their leader, most guys are looking to blame someone else for problems of their own making.

Eagles/Commies:

Saquon’s assault on the MVP trophy seems to have run out of gas. Much like always, I suspect he’s breaking down because that’s what he does when gets a fair amount of usage. No worries though, everyone else has got it in a higher gear-that offense is fearful when fully engaged.

Cards/Panthers:

Who dropped this dirty bomb in our laps? Carolina has been keeping it close these days (last week is the exception) so I expect this to be a trap game for an Arizona team that is looking for an excuse to falter down the stretch.

Have fun folks.

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Doktor Zymm

Aw, Happy Holidays Bryce

Spur

YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Fuck da EAGLES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Doktor Zymm

Holy shit, this game is nuts!

Doktor Zymm

Extra fitting since Litre is allergic to nuts

Gumbygirl

And yet, he hangs out here!

ArmedandHammered

Sudden change! Litre perks up!

litre_cola

Blankenship you beauty!!!!

King Hippo

You needed that drop for the cover, even!

Gatoraids

Guardian glasses keeping him safe

clint greasewood

He was close but Rudolph drove the the Tits sleigh in to a ditch.

Spur

When it matters most – that’s the Barkley I know, dropping balls.

Gatoraids

Penix out there tossing a hotdog down a hallway

Gatoraids

Tennessee halftime speech most uplifting for the Tits since the Wonder Bra.

Brick Meathook

This is how I picture Gatoraids staying up all last night writing this joke:

https://ibb.co/DVBvXpJ

Unsurprised

Nice footwork to keep that INT inbound

King Hippo

Wee Kyler does his best Uncle Jack impression. What a window to be alive!

Doktor Zymm

The ghost of the 2023 Eagles has arrived to haunt the defense!

Spur

comment image

Spur

Commies! Commies!

King Hippo

oh, Litre gon’ be angry. An’ Litre gon’ DRANK

litre_cola

I SAID IW ASNT GOING TO TODAY. ENGAGE WINE

Doktor Zymm

holy moly!

Gatoraids

Joe Burrow hoping to be kidnapped from this team if he has to fund a Ace Ventura sequel himself.

clint greasewood

A lot of industry have left the state of Ohio but the Factory of Sadness remains.

King Hippo

BANNER

Unsurprised

Ditto on Banner

Unsurprised

Commies coming back like Vietnam would be quite something

Gatoraids

preparing for this drive to be the Long March

Unsurprised

And in what fashion!

Gatoraids

Kenny Pickett shoulda be examined for a concussion before the game

litre_cola

THis is so painful.

King Hippo

He really is sub-Bosa brother dumb

Unsurprised

It’s interesting to see the scores of games where Defense exists vs. the others.

litre_cola

Oh Browns, never change.

King Hippo

#ThePauls

Doktor Zymm

I’m curious if more players have started wearing Guardian caps over the course of the season, but there’s no coverage of that since October. Annoying.

Redshirt

Factory!

ballsofsteelandfury

They’re consistent. You’ve gotta give them that.

Doktor Zymm

They are a proud multi-generational sadness manufactory!

ArmedandHammered

time to start the meal, later lizard people

Redshirt

Bengals bungling in process.

Doktor Zymm

Fake bobbled snap fumble? LOL
Kinda mean to the poor hapless Bears defense, but also pretty awesome

Col. Duke LaCross

Only the Bears could fall for a trick play that involves nothing but having half the skill players on the field either stumbling or falling down.

Gatoraids

provides them a good excuse since LaPorta was going to be open anyways

Gatoraids

and you’d think theyd be used to that from all their practices

Redshirt

Tee is ded.

ArmedandHammered

As the sun sets further on the British Empire.

Horatio Cornblower

I learned about this movie today, and now I have to see it.

comment image

Melanie Griffith must have owed someone a considerable amount of money.

Redshirt

Meth is a hell of a drug.

Unsurprised

It’s boring

ArmedandHammered

not if your stoned and the over acting was funny to me in, and of itself

ArmedandHammered

it is a lot of fu and also has Tim Thomerson in it. Jack Deth!

Horatio Cornblower

“In a post-apocalyptic California of 2017…”

I’m sorry, what? Even for ’85 or so that seems awfully pessimistic. 2027, sure.

Gatoraids

was surprised the Rifftrax/mst3k guys havent done this one yet.

ballsofsteelandfury

How did you not know about this???

Redshirt

BLEERGH is keeping the Browns in this game.

Gatoraids

Giants offense the gift that keeps giving to the other teams defense

ArmedandHammered

One of these days a defense is going to actually murder their offense.

ArmedandHammered

or vice versa

Horatio Cornblower

“You know T, they called me ‘the Throat Goat’ back in the day”

https://twitter.com/PulpLibrarian/status/1870163123732382060

Horatio Cornblower

OK, that should be the second one the joke goes to, not the first one that wasn’t even on the one I copied from. What the fuck, Elon?

Gatoraids

twitter search algorithm now with Epstein inside

Col. Duke LaCross

Gluck Gluck 9000

blaxabbath

We leave in less than 24 hours. I’m going to pack like a pair of trunks and then Santa’s stuff in a checked bag. Dogs get dropped off with their sitter this afternoon.

I’m beat to shit but, thankfully, my wife learned why we don’t fucking open our house to parties. So long as I can get everything crammed into the dumpster, this fucking place is going into lockdown and everyone else can just suck it this holiday season.

litre_cola

Thought you were already on the island?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

…everyone else can just suck it this holiday season.

That’s the spirit!

Don T

Again, turn off the TEN game before halftime. Not worth the Russian adware.

blaxabbath

You’re damn near a card carrying member of the Nation….

Don T

I’m a sympathizer, yes. Just get Minshew ouuta there.

Redshirt

Орел в гнездо. Орел в гнездо. Лиса покинула курятник.

Don T

🤣

ArmedandHammered

I heard, that their army recruitment ads are all a pack of lies.

Unsurprised

I couldn’t imagine

Fronkenshteen

Arm tackling Jayden Daniels is like trying to take down a deer with a pool noodle.

Doktor Zymm

I think I could manage that if I was allowed to tie the pool noodle to the bumper of my car

blaxabbath

And use said composite-noodle system to strike Daniels in the head.

ArmedandHammered

The Falcons know they are not facing the Patriots right?

Unsurprised

50/50

Doktor Zymm

The Giants seem to be pretty clear on the fact that they aren’t facing the Patriots

Redshirt

Can’t get 45 yards FG but drills it from 59? Sure, why not?!

ArmedandHammered

He’s a sniper.

clint greasewood

The Drones are stalling the Jets offense

ArmedandHammered

Anybody remember this line “Please don’t leave, the drones need you!”

Col. Duke LaCross

Go Bears, I guess.

Unsurprised

Where?

Gumbygirl
Don T

It’s not wrong if you’re bitter 🫠

Gatoraids

Most lost Robinson since Crusoe out there today for the Commies