Your Friday Eve Open Thread

We’re almost there folks. Up here in The Canadia we have a Family Day holiday on the Monday. How will I be celebrating? I’ve no idea. During these sled dog days of winter I pass the time at work developing sales projects so that when the weather turns into something bearable the company that is Scotchnauts R’ Us can hit the ground running. So that’s nice.

Minutiae:

-Anyone need the most toxic, broken-down, perpetually-smirking bridge QB of all time? The word is that new coach Aaron Glenn asked him to ditch the Pat McAfee Show as a condition for him staying with the team but Qaron refused. Why would he voluntarily toss aside a platform that allows him to say anything he wants and not have an iota of pushback in real time? That’s his “Precious” and he’s not going to abandon that. Thing is, if he doesn’t have a job next season what would be the point of McAfee shelling out another million to hear the thoughts of a retired crank?

-You can bet that if Kadarius Toney makes the news these days it won’t be because he pulled someone from a burning building, or anything positive, really. Turns out he was arrested recently for choking a woman to the extent that there were broken blood vessels in her eyes that were documented. (I forget the name of that condition and sure as hell don’t want to spell it-help me out in the comments) Is it wrong to wonder how large his baby oil stash is?

-Pratt Leaving a Sinking Ship: I mean, defense. Cincy linebacker Germaine Pratt can see the writing on the wall that Burrow is trying to erase. What can Brown do for you, Pratt? Not spend money, that’s for sure.

-Travis Kelce will take some time off to bang a hot billionaire on the regular and then tell the breathless masses what he wants to do next year. His other option is to be a part-time player next year and watch Noah Grey grow his wings. The draftheads tell me that this year is rich in tight ends so I expect the Chiefs to draft to that spot no later than the fourth no matter the news.

-We got some quality hockey taking (semi) center stage tonight. Sharpen your wits. Lace up your double entendres. Put on your best game wit.

Give me what you’ve got.