Good evening. The schedule for today was simple: some administrative work, then lunch with Madre and then dog-sitting the bitch on the banner.
How vah, the dog sitting turned into a slumbering journey, which started in the couch and ended in bed. It was long and glorious nap. Anyway,
NFL MEWS
It’s not even June. Dammit.
SPROTS TO MIGHT
All times Central.
GRANDES LIGAS
Doyers (Knack) @ Mets (Senga) – 6:00
NBA EASTERN CONFERENCE FINALS
Knicks @ Pacers (lead 2-0) : 7:00
For those who commemorate:
I think Starks is the most famous inconsistent performer I’ve seen. An All-Timer during, oh… Let’s say the 48 games in his career when he got hella hot.
BTW, the dunk was in Game 2; Bulls won that series in 6 games. But IN YOUR FACE amirite? What a colossably inconsequential milestone.
Yeah I’m cranky AND sleepy.
TOP FLIGHT FÚTBOL
Today is the last day of the club fútbol season. Jesucristo señorrrrr we’re entering Absolute Void.
Bolivia
Guabirá v. Oriente Petrolero – 6:30
Brasil
Fortaleza v. Cruzeiro – 6:30
Chile
Deportes Iquique v. Unión La Calera – 7:00
Costa Rica
Alajuelense v. Hereditano – 6:00
Ecuador
El Nacional v. Emelec – 6:00
Honduras
FINAL – 2nd Leg
Olimpia v. Real España
Olimpia won 2-1 on the first leg.
Perú
Deportivo Garcilaso v. Juan Pablo II – 6:00
Secsi Mexi
FINAL – 2nd Leg
Toluca v. América – 8:00
The winner will be the champion of the 2025 Clausura, the second part of the 2024-2025 fútbol season, which is played as a separate tournament. América won the Apertura this season, and the first leg of this final ended 0-0. So this is a Trü Final, as the announcers will surely state repeatedly.
U.S.A.
NWSL
San Diego Wave v. North Carolina Courage – 9:00
MLS
Atlanta United v. FC Cincinnati – 6:00
FINALLY,
I had never seen this video before this week. I share it with you now.
Fucking brilliant.
Bars are starting to close, so bring on the DUIs and overdoses!
Also, found Moose:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZmIKIbjCMOg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s7PvYLtKynM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3JWTaaS7LdU
Absolutely nuts. What a night.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=coRoVaCR2mY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLsqirPrUPE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3cQNkIrg-Tk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WAoLJ8GbA4Y
JK, this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2EaE0_gQLw0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TdsAa919RUY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzVJPgCn-Z8
Might as well play BINGO…
You can mark “Armed Robbery” on your card.
How many BBQ accidents so far?
Not nearly enough!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZKu_f2qGTVs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qchPLaiKocI
USA! USA! USA!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5pb8-vmamnk
Not… dead? Fuck it, not dead!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dC8XSHbXqPM
Memorial Day weekend: the start of summer, and one of the crezziest times of the year. Who’s ready for 16 hours of fun?
Hey, this is a 24/7/365 operation.
-derelicts
25/8/367
We went down to watch professional rugby (yes, it’s a real thing) in Irvine and while there we stopped at an Aldi’s. In the parking lot on the way out the woman who had been in front of us in the register line – fortyish, Asian – was cracking open one of the beers she had just bought. “Can I party with you?” I would have asked her, if I were a bit more fancy-free.
Certainly appears like a lady who enjoys a party.
Sounds like the lady in front of me at the market the other day except she was black and opened her own coconuts with a machete
Aldi is a strange land.
At least people were wise to save Ufford’s breakup guide from the current owners letting all the content from before 2024 get deleted for lack of payment. Anyway. I hate to have to send it to my bro, but it is what it is.
https://web.archive.org/web/20130609065807/kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2013/06/definitive-post-breakup-guide-ksk-mailbag.html
Those reef girls seem nice.
Interesting to see some old, forgotten names, and some ones that still around. Even I chirped in, which I almost never did for Uff’s fantasy column.
I wonder what Moose has been up to?
Wandering happily somewhere we hope.
Spreading his joyful memes and gifs, I bet!
Some idiot:
Blount did, in fact, make the roster, and got 153 touches for 772 yards and 7 touchdowns.
Deep dive.
I was lurking back then, 2013… Holy shit how time does friggin fly…
Spritsmugglare is the word for bootlegger in Swedish. Excellent word
Oh, the Duck Dynasty old guy died.
Cool, I always rooted for the ducks.
Welp, we’ll see you in another 25 years.
TIL Weaselo is a periodical cicada.
Just in time for the next Haley’s comet appearance.
/not an actual fact.
But you stayed in a Holiday Inn Express the other night.
Based only on these few minutes I have watched (including an “IND LEADS 2-0” chyron), I think the NBA needs to find a new way to seed their post-season so these uncompetitive late-round series dont come up again and waste all their fans’ time.
TJ McConnell was the nice guy player that Arizona fans all looked to for pride when our head coach was a Sean Miller type. Its good to see he’s made a space for himself in the new soft NBA.
I just turned on the Pacers game. Am I correct that, this generation has entered hyperwoke territory and will now have a white guy train an asian kid to pass on the Karate Kid legacy?
I look forward to RFKjr leading America’s schoolchildren in daily Trump Chi Exercises/Prayer.
Wax on/wax off will be instructions for the child laborers in the Trumpmobile factories
I loved John Starks so much! The dude played at three obscure Oklahoma colleges and was a training camp body for the Knicks at the age of 25. On the day he was going to be cut there was a scrimmage and he said, “fuck it”, and tried to dunk over Pat Ewing. He fucked up his ankle while failing to do so and the team couldn’t release an injured player. While he was at the end of the bench a few guards got injured and he was “forced” into a 6th man role. He took it from there. Kinda unbelievable.
Lowratio in PR:
Sabado Gigante?
I think it was another show. It was on Estrella
He blends!
Not sure if I’ve shared this but, I don’t nap.
Of course I could but it just makes me sluggish afterwards and doesn’t produce the desired effect.
Just me I guess.
I feel sluggish for the first 10 minutes after waking from a nap but if I resist the urge to fall back asleep I feel great. Like quaaludes.
Napping is epic. I get the munchies hard after a nap.
If I’m sleeping diring the day, it’s because I’m sick. I used to love naps, they just don’t happen any more.
That video is hilarious.
When the mascot leaves him hanging 🤣🤣🤣
Gonna casually nervous not-watch. Fuck Reggie for eternity.
There are not enough plus 1s in the universe for this comment.
Better than Xanax 💤
Oooof. Yup, there’s some food coma material right there…
But, when comparing it to Xanax, I counter with:
You gonna use that mustard?
That’s mayoketchup, b!