Hello there fellow DFO’er. Hope you’re well today. And thanks for coming back to see last weeks tl;dr of last week as decided by my brain. There’s no reason as to why some comments make it and others don’t. Seriously. There isn’t.
This weeks cheesy motivational quote is:
Man is not what he thinks he is. He is what he hides [in bed].
André Malraux
Don’t tell mom about the super hero comics.
-Eli
Finally getting and staying warm here. Still colder than the last few years at this point in the season, but it’s not snowing, so will take it. All this means is that I now need to take care of all the stuff outside, so that we’re “not that neighbour”.
Without further ado, here are the comments of the week.
Don T
You’d think the Oilers were the Democratic Party the way they keep looking at the refs to do something while the Panthers run all over them, while doing absolutely nothing about it themselves.
Send some 4th-winger out to take a two-handed axe swing at Bennett’s knee or shut the fuck up.
Horatio Cornblower
THESE GUYS, THE FLORIDA PANTHERS, I CALL THEM AN ICE RAID BECAUSE THEY ARE BEING PRETTY ABUSIVE TO THESE GUYS FROM ANOTHER COUNTRY
LemonJello
Doctor Phil is a real doctor and also a pedophile. Both of those statements might be false.
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025/jun/09/dr-phil-ice-los-angeles-raids
Jimbo
Oprah Winfrey has done far more harm to this country than anyone wants to acknowledge. Phil McGraw, Oz, The Bridges of Madison County. The list goes on and on.
Horatio Cornblower
Cool Protest Sign/Poster is Rocking!
🐻
rockingdog
Don T
I spent a big chunk of the day putting together one of those over the toilet shelving unit thingies. Step 11 was to put it into place and then attach it to the wall and add the final support brackets. It was then I realized that it didn’t fit, and there was not a fucking thing I could do to force it to fit. Did I swear a blue streak, bust it into tiny pieces, and toss it in the dumpster? You bet your ass I did! Like a motherfucking lady!
Gumbygirl
We got home from walking the dog at 4:45 and the Dr. Mrs. asked me when dinner would be ready because she’s really hungry. It is currently 6:10, her dinner has been ready since 5:15, and she hasn’t been downstairs in over an hour. I can hear her cleaning.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
What’s dinner?
Game Time Decision
It’s a meal usually eaten in the evening, but that’s not important right now.
LemonJello
Well that was a quick Civil War.
Redshirt
Well I’m sure with America’s attention span we’ll never forget it and will make rational decision in the future based on our accurate recollections about…
Hey, a shiny new meme coin!!!
Horatio Cornblower
This is devious and amazing:
Sharkbait
This would have worked too:
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Is Senorita Weaselo done with weddings because she keeps getting asked when she is getting married?
ballsofsteelandfury
No, she never grew up with them and has a limited battery for such things (social anxiety being a part of it).
Now, on the other hand, I’m the one who keeps getting asked when we’re getting married!
Senor Weaselo
So. When are you getting married. JOIN US.
SonOfSpam
So in one shift at work, US Senators are being arrested for asking questions and Netanyahu is trying start WW3 again. How long was that shift?!
Redshirt
Last Friday at my brother in laws, watching hockey.
Mrs. Fozz sits down and rattles off the following questions:
“Who is in the white?”
“Are all the players on Florida from America?”
“Is this the regular season?”
My brother in law, nicest guy in the world, says, “I think you need to go outside with my wife and have a margarita. I really think you should.”
jjfozz
So we gonna talk about Senator Padilla getting tackled to the ground by the FBI for “interrupting” Secretary Noem’s press conference?
BrettFavresColonoscopy
Have to keep your head on a swivel at ALL times. This is why you have to attend OTA’s.
litre_cola
Ciao tutti
2Pack
I check the score of game 4, 3-0 after one. Now it’s 3-3. Is it me or do I smell some bananacakes cooking in Florida…
Or it’s meth. It’s Florida, so it’s probably meth.
Sharkbait
Allegheny County police say a 911 call came in around 11:48 p.m. Thursday for a multi-vehicle crash in the 500 block of Pittsburgh Street near Park Avenue.
Initially, police were dispatched to the 500 block of Pittsburgh Street near Park Avenue for a multi-vehicle crash just before midnight.
When I told princess and my parents this jorb will get me on the news, this isn’t what I meant.
WCS
Backpack full of t shirts and soon to be replaced underwear, some gummies and a camera.
In 1979 I spent my nineteenth birthday at Wrigley field. In 1988 I spent my 28th birthday at Wrigley. 1997 was my 37th also spent watching my Cubs. 2010 I turned 50 at Wrigley. This year I turn 65 and on Tuesday I will be celebrating and watching my Cubbies beat up on that pussy Brewer squad drinking beer down the third baseline at Wrigley field.
Tomorrow morning I hop on a plane and head to Chicago. No place in the world I’d rather be for a birthday.
DJ TAJ
2025 I will make my first trip to Wrigley field.
DFO is a land of contrasts.
Mr. Ayo
Very belated good evening to everyone.
Eldest granddaughter is carrying the family torch.
Graduated with honors.
Now she has a day off and goes to work on Monday. Next school starts in August.
She’s pretty amazing.
yeah right
Guess who didn’ have to sign an NDA??? There will be a hell of a BOTG coming soon.
litre_cola
caitlyn jenner is stuck in tel aviv, everything now is an onion article even when not trying
https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/general-news/caitlyn-jenner-israel-pride-visit-disrupted-iran-war-1236290478/
fleshwound_NPG
Oh noes
Did I manage to sound like I care even a little?
Doktor Zymm
My SIL and I just made our signs for the No Kings protest in Riverside. Teargas and truncheons, here we come!
Gumbygirl
I vote for the govts of both Israel and Iran to be massively destabilized by war and give up theocracy in favor of secular EU-style democratic confederation. If Bibi and the Ayatollah end up dying while hugging each other in a bunker after realizing they’re both horrible human beings responsible for thousands upon thousands of deaths then all the better
Doktor Zymm
Oh, and stephen miller is also in the bunker for some reason.
Doktor Zymm
Don T
Wife/kid took me to bar trivia for Fathers Day, because what else could I possibly want?
Yeah, I got gift card action.
SonOfSpam
Just had to talk a frantic wife through CPR on her suicidal husband who she had just taken down off a noose.
WCS
Wife: “OH MY GOD! WHAT DO I DO?”
WCS: “CHEST COMPRESSIONS ON AND OFF EVERY THIRTY SECONDS AND EXPLAIN TO HIM THAT RODGERS IS ONLY GOING TO BE THERE FOR JUST ONE SEASON!”
Wife: “JUST ONE SEASON? I THOUGHT HE HAD AN OPTION FOR A SECOND YEAR?”
WCS: “PINCH HIS NOSE AND BREATH INTO HIS MOUTH! NO, HE’S A BRIDGE QB!”
Wife: “HIS BREATH IS REALLY BAD! AS BAD AS TOMMY MADDOX, AM I RIGHT?”
WCS: “YOU ARE SO RIGHT! CAN YOU TAKE HIS PULSE?”
Wife: “SURE I CAN, BY THE WAY, WHEN DO YOU GET OFF?”
WCS: “EVERY TIME THE STEELERS SCORE SIX. YOU?”
Wife: “….”
Found a funny:
LAPD and LA Sheriffs tried to prevent two large protests from joining together in downtown and both departments ended up hitting EACH OTHER with impact munitions from across the same interesection.
rockingdog
Don T
Happy Fathers’ Day.
Vasectomies for all.
Friggin kids.
Don T
I don’t want to brag, but I got fresh gelato, and “something still in the mail” (hopefully that difficult to find Ramones CD) for Father’s day. Life is good.
2Pack
Actually this Father’s Day we should show our appreciation for Internet Dad and all he did getting the site back online last week.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
My Father’s Day Present:
Wifey and Oldest Skull Fracture Boy deign to swim out to the middle of the lake with me as I requested. Combined, they are 38 years younger than me and made fun of me because I wasn’t able to keep up. Thing is-just like every year for the last 8 years-I’m going to keep on swimming almost every other day and will kick their asses if they accept the same challenge in late September.
/why yes, I am a petty boy
scotchnaut
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Thanks for all the comments and funny and everything else.
NOTE banner image from here
“The Bridge QBs of Allegheny County”
By Mike Tomlin
(as seen on The Oprah Winfrey show)
WCS right now
I’m glad Scotchy’s reply to WCS made this week’s post. That was classic!
when they score six got me another JAAA ja jaA
😃
You want to snuggle with rodents at a coffee shop, I have a few ideas right here in DC.
That’s cool that Coach Kryzewski hangs out at the coffee shops near you and is up for cuddling with random stragers.
Love it, but nawt sure worth Florida
Ole Andre was close to right, a man is what he hides. But like DLR sang, don’t want ’em to get yer goat – don’t show ’em where its hidden.
Thanks for the recap good sir. Don T’s Keith Richards post really tied Fathers Day together…