TGIF! You made it ! Welcome to the long weekend. Full of so much footy you’ll need three (3) screens to watch it all live! JV footy (OK vs Temple on ESPN now!), Lesser Footy, F1 at Monza, La Vuelta, the TOUR Championship, US Open (tennis variety), NASCAR, and a little MLB if you need a nap. Let’s get to it!
Survival – Personal Edition
Wedding season should be over. But some of your “friends” don’t recognize the sanctity of fall weekends and not only schedule their weddings during this time, but also have the temerity to invite you. After a fit of blinding rage, you may at some point come to your senses and prioritize this “friend” over a, frankly, weak Saturday slate and agree to go. Of course, in your distraction of making sure you didn’t overlook a good matchup, you forgot your precious cuff links. Let’s fashion up some emergency cuff links.
- Remove your shirt. Wait, first, find someplace private. Don’t do this standing up next to the altar or something.
- Thread a ribbon (up to 1/4″ wide) through the cuff holes.
- Tie knots on the outside of one cuff. Start with one as close to the cuff hold as possible. Then do a second knot on top of the first. These knots should be bigger than the cuff hole.
- Check they’re big enough by gently tugging on the other end of the ribbon. If the knots slip through the hold, tie a third knot and check again. Once properly knotted, trim the excess ribbon just past the knot.
- Repeat for the other cuff hole, then repeat again for the other sleeve.
- Put that shirt on and make sure to keep your jacket sleeve pulled as far down as possible to avoid any close inspection of your handiwork.
- No ribbon? No problem! You can also use the following items to use as cuff links:
- Paper clips
- Twist ties
- Rubber bands
- Key chain rings
- Earrings, large
- Cherry stems, tied
- Shoelaces, trimmed short
And problem solved! Now get home and catch that Hawai’i game for your gambling fix.
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Survival – Species Edition
Time to put the sexy in Friday!
Enjoy the weekend, folks! Alright, now let’s get to the comments!
It really has been a bowl of shit stew tonight.
90% sure I’ve caught at least two fatalities meself: one pedestrian run over and splat. Now, a shooting. There’s been at least three of those tonight with casualties.
More to follow.
May or may not have just spoke to an actual hostage. Female said her boyfriend has a gun and won’t let her leave. Then she hung up. GTD may know this, but it came from a 9-1-1 only number, so I can’t call it back to see what’s going on.
Fuck me, I usually enjoy LaboUr Dauy.
I would have to find some serious balance if I were doing your job. Seeing the worst in people at work, I’d need to search for a pastime that immersed me in some of the best. Some sort of volunteer work helping people.
Happy long weekend peoples!
Last full week before vacation.
While I may make a flatbread and possibly a breakfast and some homemade veggie stock and soup for next week and probably a toasted ham and cheese on fresh bread, the Sunday Gravy kitchen is on vacation too.
After this Sunday.
Damn, I feel happy, healthy and it’s good to be alive!
Now I can’t stop thinking about a flatbread breakfast sandwich.
Oh shit!
/ takes down notes
Dude, you roll that dough super thin, fill that with Iberian ham, some local cheese, a couple of fresh eggs, baste with olive oil then throw that in a 550 degree charcoal fired pizza oven.
I’m gonna need a minute.
Oh, that sounds good. I wonder if they have something like that in Spain.
Of course they do.
Once you get past the charcuterie.
/ Never got past the charcuterie.
Oh yeah, talk dirty to me.
My bad, coach.
BLOOD FOR THE EYE GOODS
BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD EYE!
EYE FOR THE BLOOD GOOD!
TREES FOR THE TREES GOD!
Game of Thrones S8 E8 sucks pretty hard for as much action as it has. But it does have…
but y tho?
Because the internet DEMANDED it.
The Hound was mad at his brother from Day 1.
Put his bleeding face in the fire and stole his favorite toy.
Want to get noticed?
Go jogging without moving your arms.
/ is silly enough to try this
A brisk walk in the morning suits me well.
How you doing my friend?
Good Buddy. Things are under control. Couple ladies have told me recently that I don’t look 65. Good man, pretty good…
Stanford and TCU with the an historic ACC-Big 12 game to start the season.
I’m not much of a gamer but l’d play all day and night with lady number 6. Thanks Ayo. Hand grenade pull pins would make some sturdy field expedient cuff links. Pam would approve of those.
This weekend is going to be such a shitshow on like 48 different levels.
Yinz planning to burn a couch, see if Sen. Vance leaps out?
sexy friday indeed!
Lets congratulate JD Vance on the birth of his son!
Ooh, I bet it’s a red hot mess on a holiday weekend. I could never do what you do, but I’m proud of you for doing it. You are my favorite, Prince WCS of the Yinzers!
The clowns have an extra day to get liquored up and make poor decisions.
Rebuttal: Wedding season for me apparently doesn’t end until *checks calendar* the middle of the month.
But one shouldn’t wear white after LaboUr day
Duke is beating Elon, but not the Elon I’d like to see beaten.
Loser has to vacation in ASPEN instead of Gstaad
The horror!
Send the loser to CAPE COD!
The hell is wrong with the cape?
It’s not Kennebunkport, mainly.
So less chance of getting run over by a coked-up Kennedy spawn? I’ll take my chances with the Massholes.
Theres a small batch distiller I hit in Kennebunkport whenever I can…
Gonna be very unsexy for a moment
Poor one out* for my rabbit, Rex, who hopped to the big hay field in the sky tonight. He’s been sick for awhile, so while we will miss him, glad that he’s no longer sick
*carrot juice
Aww, RIP Rex. All the best to the family.
Awwww, Rex was a beautiful bun. I’m so sorry, it sucks saying goodbye to them.
RIP Rex
Sincerely sorry GTD and GTD family, furry and not.
Youngest GTD isn’t taking the news well, lotsa tears
I’m sure he’ll perk right up after a hot steaming bowl of hasenpfeffer.
Lololol, and may God have mercy on us.
[just in case]
So sorry, we have had a few scares lately and I am still worried about one of ours. I still miss all of ours who have passed.
h
ttps://i.postimg.cc/SxH4tG2v/GIF-20240825-135400-412.gif
BIIIIIIIGGGGGGG gif
Fever coach takes C-Clark out of the game because-
1) It’s a blowout
2) She doesn’t want the other team to be embarrassed more than they are
3) She’s a good sportsperson
4) There’s absolutely no accounting for what opposing players will do to Clark given the opportunity during garbage time.
5) She’s late for the Spelling Bee Reunion Special
/I guess I’ve never actually seen her compared to Speeling Bee Champion Rebecca Sealfon, just assumed it was obvious BUT IF NOT I claim credit for this joke
Is there a Bad Boy Pistons of the WNBA?
Indiana Fever vs. Chicago Sky definitely living up to the Toxic WNBA Discourse Bowl IV billing with these techs/flagrants
this game is doin 90s nba bullshit so hard that i am expecting charles oakley to parachute in at any minute
Refs are catching on to the notion that one of the stars of the league can’t be tackled in the open court in a blowout game.
The UNC QB who broke his leg still gets to attend classes for free. Do the NIL boosters just shoot him in the head now and preserve his further “earnings” for NIL players in ’25? No way I’m paying for some kid who is DONE FOR GOOD to sit on the sideline.
And here I was thinking that the only thing you’re paying for these days was surfing lessons. smh…
Hey! The guy I pay to make me feel like I enjoy surfing says I’m really good!
Hookers of the sea, as they are known colloquially.
Is he a horse and can’t ever run again?
I’ve got the fever for the flavor and Caitlin Clark is my pusher.
watching this game and…everything is foul
Seems like she found a teammate that understands the pick and roll and the offense is flourishing as a result because it opens up so many other options/open shots.
/thinking about her and Monika Czinano when they beat undefeated SC in 2023.
#1 looks like she may want to go surfing with me.
THIS OKLAHOMA TEAM, I CALL SAMSON AS THEY ARE BRINGING TEMPLE DOWN.
The Old Testament is just the gift that keeps on giving!
GREAT idea alert – Duke football should have a “poop emoji” helmet
The gamer girl for me.
Digging #10 today. Yowza!
Request Line puzzle answer (given the clue of “kunduz” which is the Turkish word for “beaver”):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4LzQOlX7Xl8
DFO’s expected reaction (artist’s conception):
Damn. My next guess was The Proclaimers, “Belgian Song of the Somewhat Compromised”!
Ned Flanders’ “Springfield Song of the Okily Dokily”
coffee girls FTW!
please God, let Bloodeyes/Trees be entertaining, this Friday slate is killing me