Hello there fellow DFO’er. Hope you’re well today. And thanks for coming back to see last weeks tl;dr of last week as decided by my brain. There’s no reason as to why some comments make it and others don’t. Seriously. There isn’t.
Haven’t been around much lately, life and work and parents have been keeping me super busy. Things are starting to work themselves out, but will prob be another week or 2 before it’s back to my normal schedule. Honestly., I can’t wait to have nothing to do every night. I do enjoy quiet nights with Mrs GTD and not behind on someone else’s schedule.
And Happy St. Patty’s day for those that do something today.
Without further ado, here are the comments of the week.
I would like to draft the DFO server. Really dropped off in quality of late.
Horatio Cornblower
(pokes Bengals with stick)
Redshirt
Not recommended.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Dumpling and Dim Sum fest? Why yes, I AM interested!
Doktor Zymm
I saw this on Twitter, but it was something to the effect of “Tua is really gonna be bummed about his release when they have to tell him again tomorrow”
Horatio Cornblower
TEN signed Mitch Trubisky. Saving whelm: no more fretting about Will Levis.
Don T
Makes sense he signs with the TITS…
ballsofsteelandfury
saw on another forum
Gatoraids
Do we have a Fozz reaction or is he going to the hotel Crosby is in to finish the job?
Redshirt
Do you think Maxx Crosby was named that because he was conceived in a TJ Maxx dressing room?
Doktor Zymm
it is already a struggle for jason pierre-paul to use a computer
fleshwound_NPG
Found a funny:
crime dog you gotta find some better wording for this
rockingdog
Last funny:
“Hi, I’m Johnny Knoxville. Welcome to the Strait of Hormuz.”
“Watch me catch a shahed drone in the balls.”
rockingdog
I would go upvote that reddit post but I was handed a three day ban for “threatening violence” in that I objected to a suggestion that the U.S. should fire cruise missiles at Iranians launching drones at tankers in the Strait of Hormuz, because we needed to save those cruise missiles to fire at buildings full of schoolgirls.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
You know what’s great? Besides Alex dropping in on us with this fantastic little series, (I would have fanboyed to an embarrassing degree in front of Mina Kimes)?
Volunteering to cover a deposition for another attorney on a Friday afternoon so she could cover something for her kids’ school and then having that deposition get canceled 5 minutes ago. You get to look like a hero while doing exactly nothing.
Horatio Cornblower
I’m rooting for Minnesota to go perfect next year behind Kyler Murray.
blaxabbath
So apparently the USA baseball team had a talk from that asshole SEAL who claims he shot bin Laden, and now at least one of the guys on the team is wearing a ‘Front Towards Enemy’ T-shirt and ohmygod I cannot wait until the DR just waxes these assholes.
It’s like rooting for a team of cops.
Horatio Cornblower
Redshirt
Hear me out…
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
2Pack
I went to my orange tree at halftime and picked the highest fruits. They’re soft and plump and sweet. I’ve been juicing them thus far and the second half is going fine. I got like 68 ounces Fresh.
I’m making some BIG tequila sunrise type drinks tonight and walk around explaining what I’ve known all season.
Arizona IS Big-12 Basketball
blaxabbath
Happy Ides to all who celebrate. Remember, it’s a communal celebration so make sure you AND a buddy stab your boss to death.
obscurejones
It’s a celebration!
Don T
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Thanks for all the comments and funny and everything else.
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Free agency is fuel to our dickjoke fire
I’m never included in SGTDR but instead I’m enjoying this warm apple pie with real vanilla ice cream and real whipped cream and I’m not snowed in. God Bless.
I just paid $5.60 for gas, that was with 20 cents off per gallon with Vons points. I am ready to cut a bitch.
I got a tank at $5.50 on Sunday. Not the worst it’s been but anything over $5 is my unhappy zone. At least it’s goddamn sweltering so I don’t have to use gas driving to my canceled horseback lessons 🙁
Happy anniversary to this gem of a tweet from the Bears
Great Moments In Social Media History.
I remember having to explain the issue with orange on St. Patrick’s day to a very confused person on Twitter. Clearly not Irish.
Whoa.let’s not start that shit again!
I know that I have the surfing bug again because I’m just getting over an illness and I see this headline…
…and I’m all…
Analytics you can use
https://bsky.app/profile/cjzero.bsky.social/post/3mh7rwlwvj22b
Couscous?
On this St. Patrick’s Day let’s remember the real heroes
Popped into a tavern for lunch and they actually have “Irish Car Bomb” on the special St Patrick’s Day menu.
I do not think I’m the one who should tell them this is offensive.
leave it to one of those filthy Papists.
Offensive? Sure. But also a very good drink!
Also, let us remember the greatest Tweet reply ever:
Wow.
Doing that uniquely California experience of having my car smog checked.
It’s a fucking scam, man!
That’s why I drive a car that doesn’t need it!
Did you get a smug check too?
And maybe do a Smaug check, he’s been sleeping in really late, even for him.
Hopefully a British lass gave him a snog check
I am NOT going to use the word smegma twice in one week, because I am a fucking lady!
The Straight of Hormus was a thing I swear I learned about only one time. Like someone showed me that map and the Mighty Mississippi Size (i dont know…) waterway And the takeaway I had was, “oh yeah, that’s just so obviously something you cannot effectively control and secure by force.” I understood how At The Table Iran was and knew it.
And for the next 15 years, I figured everyone had just also seen this map at some point. Like early internet. And that’s why like everyone understood why we didnt attack Iran when we had them sandwiched between Iraq and Afghanistan deployments.
But now — and this is my fault for being surprised in 2026 — I’m realizing a lot of people have not, in fact, seen that map and, as importantly, the joke that the most practical option here is trying to have the tanker jump the point.
As we say here in America, those who don’t learn history vote Republican.
I’d set the O/U on Americans who could find Iran on the map at 41%, and then I’d take the under.
It’s a bit harder now that all those [Krygscipnzsk]-stan countries exist. It was much easier when all those places were just one lump of Soviet Union red.
Be surprised if it was over 30%.
sponsored by MapKings
Thank you Sir.
Sup?
https://youtu.be/2JywkrIiXW8?si=aqhtHBZgF7pPsilU
Double up the opiates, Hippo’s comin’ home loaded!!
https://bsky.app/profile/ml-j.bsky.social/post/3mhbb7fa4ok2b
Miami is gonna have their clocks set to the wrong time zone (Israel) in their War Room and miss getting the first four picks in on time.
Meant to put this in random thoughts at the top:
Stages of Spring:
Winter
Fool’s Spring (The first warm day where everyone wears shorts)
Second Winter (It snows again) <================ Currently Stuck here
Spring of Deception (You think it’s finally over)
Third Winter (The final, cruel freeze)
Mud Season (The ground thaws)
The Pollening (Yellow dust covers everything)
Actual Spring (It lasts for about a week)
Summer
We’re looking to set the record for EARLIEST 100 Degree Day this year. Since we’ve about maxed out every other heat record the last three years.
This morning started out nice and sunny, warm. Then around noon winter be all… Not so fast. Cool light rain and a barometer drop that’s putting the whole family in drowsy mode.
What about LA Spring where it’s going to be 98° today?
think you skipped step 1: Winter
Happy St Paddy’s Day, you degens. I just drove past a dispensary with a sign that read “Why wear green when you can smoke it?”
Por que dos?
Anche tu
She looks like a witch doctor got interrupted when he was shrinking her head.
Welcome to the KOTW club, @obscurejones!
I see the USMNT jerseys are ass again this World Cup
As is tradition
Is it a good sign when you go to retrieve your Irish flag that last night’s howling winds tore off the house, then go to put it back on the house but the flag pole is bent, so you bend the (cheap-ass aluminum) pole back straight and the flag pole holder that’s been on the house since you bought the place back in ’98 snaps in two?
I’m not finding a pot o’ gold today, am I?
Wait, does that mean Lowratio doesn’t get to wear his outfit?
He’ll be so disappointed!!
Oh there’s no stopping that.