Went down to the local at which I have been a regular for over 15 years to have a glass of wine to celebrate Sox victory. Apparently some other regular pointed me out to some forty-something year old newcomer, who approached me and the following exchange ensued (keep in mind I’ve already been alcoholically lubricating myself for several hours and am usually a little more verbally aggressive when such conditions occur):
HIm: “I’m told you were in the Navy.”
Me: “Yep.”
Him: ” I was in the Navy, flew F-14s and F-18s. What did you do?”
Me: “I was enlisted swine.”
Him: “Aww man, don’t say it like that. They said you’re a Democrat too. Really?”
Me: “Yep. I prefer to belong to the party that prioritizes the well-being of people over corporate profits. This is not the philosophy of that stupid orange motherfucker in the White House.”
Him: “What? Dude, he’s doing a good job!”
Me: “If you are a college graduate and can listen to that guy talk for more than two minutes without concluding that he’s a complete idiot, then your education was a complete farce and you were completely ripped off and should ask for a refund.”
Him: “Not everyone agrees with your opinion.”
Me: “The number of ex-Navy officers I know that think that Trump is a smart cookie has led me to conclude that I was taking orders from complete morons during my time on board. I don’t know how our ships even found port, and am thankful that I survived it.”
Down glass, “good night,” and out the door.