Author: Horatio Cornblower

Monday Morning Mock Drafts: Wait, Don’t Spoil It For Me!

Horatio Cornblower -
173

Guten Tag, degenerates.  It's another Monday morning, which means another mock draft.  This week I was scrolling through some old drafts, waiting for inspiration to strike, and stumbled upon a comment from BFC in which he said he still hasn't seen Titanic and that would be a good topic for

Monday Morning Mock Draft: Don’t Get Board

Horatio Cornblower -
137

Inspired by some controversy in last week's draft about movies based on disasters, this week we're going to be drafting board games.  The rules are, I hope, very simple:  if it's a game that involves a board, you can draft it.  If it's a game that does not involve a

Monday Morning Mock Draft: Jesus, What A Disaster

Horatio Cornblower -
187

Good Monday morning, drones.  This weekend we had to go away for a funeral.  The funeral itself was fine, as were the after...parties(?), no, that can't be right, given the circumstances.  Let's go with "functions."  Those were all good.  Lots of chatter, good memories of the deceased, solid food and

Monday Morning Mock Draft: Boots (Literally) On The Ground Edition

Horatio Cornblower -
69

Greetings fellow denizens of the internet.  I am writing this from the glorious metropolis that is Millinocket, ME.  I'm sure it was something before the timber companies all bailed out, but now it's just a place to stay at a relatively cheap hotel before, and after, climbing Mt. Katahdin, Maine's

Monday Morning Mock Draft: Oh Brother Where Art Thou?

Horatio Cornblower -
127

I was trying to work on a different topic but it wasn't working to my exacting standards and seemed likely to age badly, so I had it step down from this week's topic nomination and reached into my 'Suggested Topics' file cabinet and pulled one from frequent contributor Rikki-Tikki-Deadly. This week

Monday Morning Mock Draft: What’s HE Doing Here?

Horatio Cornblower -
60

Good Monday Morning folks.  As I write this on Sunday night I am exhausted, having spent most of the day outside either on a deck or in a lake. Oh, do you not have friends with a lake house to which you are invited when it is hot out? Pity. Anyway, like I

Monday Morning Mock Draft: Let’s Hit The Road

Horatio Cornblower -
98

Ok, we won't go into 'Horatio climbs mountains' again, because frankly two mentions on consecutive days is probably one mention too much.  But I did in fact spend a lot of time outdoors today going uphill, (it's pretty funny seeing my Fitness Calculator just fucking spin at how many calories

Monday Morning Mock Draft: Let’s Coach ‘Em Up!

Horatio Cornblower -
131

(this fucking guy shouldn't even be an undrafted free agent) This week we're drafting coaches.  I got the idea while watching the Red Sox steal 9(!) bases on the Yankees while Aaron Boone did nothing about it, other than keep pulling receivers out of his overworked bullpen and seeming surprised when

Monday Morning Mock Draft: Hey, Not So Loud!!

Horatio Cornblower -
107

(I can't think of a decent featured image for this one; someone hit with me some little people!) Greetings, folks.  I write this after having gone out to dinner with some friends who know the owners of the restaurant, (and who I suspect bankrolled at least some of it), and let