• Reflections

King Hippo - October 3, 2016October 2, 2016

61

It's not the most glorious thing in the world, but we sports fans get overly used to the idea/extent of the "doormat" designation. It seems unthinkable that Team X could ever get their shit together...and then they are down to their 3rd QB. But lo and behold, things

• Reflections

King Hippo - September 26, 2016September 25, 2016

41

Week 3 brought us multiple safeties, and multiple fat guy TDs. It was fun that way. It was also plenty surprising, as we will discuss below... Holy shit, Philadelphia. I very smugly dismissed you in the late games preview, and you done showed me fer what. More

• Reflections

King Hippo - September 19, 2016September 18, 2016

41

Hey howdy there! We sure did get some exciting (and derpy!) footballing this past Sunday, did we not? BLEERGH be praised. Remember Lawrence Taylor winning League MVP honors as a defender? Von Miller does, and says HAI. HODOR probably winced in pain just by my typing that

• Reflections

King Hippo - September 12, 2016September 11, 2016

70

Yes, football is back and our lives, shitty as they may be, finally feel complete again. Huzzah! Speaking of life, one wonders why philosophers, authors, and poets devote so much time, effort, and ink to describe the futility and meaningless of life when they could just be all like "Look

• Reflections

King Hippo - January 25, 2016January 24, 2016

32

Bear with me, folks. I am REALLY crunk. This has almost happened before. The Hippo Bowl. My favourite team, since I was two years old (the Denver Broncos - it makes no logical sense, but my mom will attest that it is indeed true), and the team that

• Reflections

King Hippo - January 18, 2016January 17, 2016

58

Holy fucking shit, I need a cigarette. Or more my style, a pipe chock full of opium. Did God decide to take the Sabbath off? Or go see the new Star Wars movie, now that the crowds have thinned out? Or maybe He just doesn't control football games

• Reflections

King Hippo - January 17, 2016January 16, 2016

39

Saturday's theme? Coaching dumbfuckery. Don't worry, there was more than enough to go around. Andy Reid did every Andy Reid thing in the Andy Reid book (well, I dunno if he ate an entire ham, but I am not willing to rule it out, either), especially on the clock

• Reflections

King Hippo - January 11, 2016January 10, 2016

91

The games were better, the results were not. In Ice Bowl 2: Electric (Bench) Boogaloo, the SeaTruthers did absolutely fuckall for 50+ minutes of game action. Minnesota built a 9-0 lead on three very strong kicks in ridiculous conditions, and the "insurmountable lead" jokes were plenty and deserved. But

• Reflections

King Hippo - January 10, 2016January 10, 2016

31

Well...that kind of blew all the goats in Pakistan, didn't it? Turns out the Texans really didn't belong in the tournament after all. And my God, is Bill O'Brien ever a stupid, stupid man. The game ended less than 10 seconds into the action, before either team even huddled

• Reflections

King Hippo - January 4, 2016January 3, 2016

59

So much sadness - the regular season comes to an end. The playoffs remain, sure. But the onsalught for the senses of a full slate of games...that is the essence of the NFL, what keeps us drooling on the couch like Mongoloids. Wait, can one still say

• Reflections

King Hippo - December 28, 2015December 27, 2015

20

Hey, that weird shit all totally happened. Not a fever dream or acid flashback, that I can gather. First, let us go back to Saturday's Thurday Night game and congratulate the Redacteds on clinching the Special Needs Division title. They did it in fine/fitting form, with Kirk Cousins making

• Reflections

King Hippo - December 21, 2015December 20, 2015

45

These be all half-hearted again, as Denver shit the second half bed even more mightily this week, losing the 2nd half 21-0 in Yinzburgh. All 3 AFC Wild Card contenders (well, 4 if you count Denver now that they are in the midst of blowing the division to the