Mini-Hippo Wild Card Thoughts

Good morning, fellow dick joke enthusiasts.  You may have noticed that Super-Duper-Mega Wild Card Bitches! weekend began yesterday.  Two FITBAW games on the docket - well, one game and one brutal skullfucking. That's Rikki's Raiders! met up with Team WKRP in what was, despite the shambolic officiating, an excellent game.  A

Instant Hippo Thoughts – Week 18, 2021 Season.

Yes, Mr. Potamus gets bumped this week.  Because 2021 season playoff history will be HER-story too! Damn, was that ever some valiant shit, or what?  The Tomsulas were deader than ded.  Like, bottom of the ocean with cement shoes dead.  17-nil down, on the road (to a team with plenty to play

Instant Hippo Thoughts – Week 17, 2021 Season

There were too many fixtures crammed into this singular day.  I liked the spreading out.  So many #WhitePplProblems up in this muthafucka. Look, I am not a doctor - or a Doktor - but as a Son of the South, ah noes my Antonio Brown diagnosis - nuttier than a shithouse rat.  We

Instant Hippo Thoughts – Week 16, 2021 Season

I hope everyone enjoyed their time with family this weekend.  And by family, of course I mean FITBAW! If we learned nothing else in 2021 (and we mostly didn't), it's this - don't go pissing Joe Burrow off.  Balmer was down to its third string QB, but Josh Johnson played fairly well. 

Instant Hippo Thoughts – Week 15, 2021 Season

December is a Glorious month for FITBAW, even with #TransformerNuAIDS trying to shit in the punch bowl.  The Shield's "don't ask, don't tell" policy sure cut that advance off! I am sure that the professional footballers of DUUUUUUVVVVVAAALLLLL are glad to see the back of Urban Meyer.  But it's still a

Instant Hippo Thoughts – Week 14, 2021 Season

Man, is Scotchy's banner quote about the Clapton-ish window ever...evergreen.  At least with respect to the early games.  One keeps thinking "it can't get any shittier" and every week it does.  MOAR BLEERGH-centred as well. The game that stayed close-ish the longest was Truthers/500s, but Seattle broke it open late.  Russ

Instant Hippo Thoughts – Week 13, 2021 Season

Oh my cats, apologies to yeah right.  That had to be brutal to watch. Because the walk-off winner today belonged to...Baby Buster and the No-Fuck Lions, an 11-yard TD toss to Amon-Ra on the last play of the game.  The most unlikeliest of heroes, for sure.  It was a bonkers game

Instant Hippo Thoughts – Week 12, 2021 Season

Welcome to the year's most depressing of Mondays! A strange JV Saturday presaged some oddball stuff at the varsity level.  And I guess we shouldn't be surprised that the helmet-less motorcycle rider that is Yinzburgh slammed into reality (h/t, Game Time Decision).  But doesn't it look weird to see...Cincinnati 41, Pittsburgh

2021 Afrikan-American Friday Mini-Hippo Thoughts (and JV Preview)

Congratulations on surviving another gluttinous holiday.  We will speak softly out of respect for the massively hungover. The Shield paired the traditional No-Fuck Lions with the Bearistocrats! this season.  You might expect hilarity to ensue, and the participants did NOT disappoint.  The game was close throughout, a fact overshadowed by its