Human Interest is an occasional series of stories investigating the whimsical side of our rich and diverse community.
News 7 Reporter Sandra Santos: Turn on your television, tune in on your radio, and chances are these days you’ll hear people talking about identity. But for one man — local small appliance repairman Omar Josephson — the events playing out in national headlines have a very personal relevance. That’s because Mr. Josephson identifies as on fire.
Local Small Appliance Repairman Omar Josephson: JESUS CHRIST IT BURNS SOMEONE HELP ME SOMEONE GET SOME WATER OR SOMETHING
Santos: As extraordinary as it may seem, Josephson said he has a strong conviction the he was born this way.
Josephson: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT NO I DON’T IT WAS THIRTY SECONDS AGO HELP PLEASE
Santos: But to others in his neighborhood, his unusual self-concept is a mystery. Many have expressed skepticism and even bewilderment.
Retired Neighbor Harrison Wilkes: Say, is that man over there on fire? I can’t believe no one’s helping him! Isn’t anyone going to put him out?
Josephson: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Santos: And doctors say that Josephson has no apparent skin conditions or psychiatric disorders that might account for the burning sensation he reports feeling at all times.
Dr. Cecilia Powell, MD: Well, what I said was actually that that man is definitely on fire, and in fact he appears by now to have sustained third-degree burns over most of his body. There’s very little we can do at this point except to try and make him more comfortable.
Santos: I guess it’s true what they say: You’ve got to be comfortable with who you are. For News 7, I’m Sandra Santos.
This post features original art by make it snow.
I think they prefer to be called “Flaming-Americans”.
You really didn’t have to change JPP’s name. I think it is publicly known now.
I like this god damn site.
/time for bed-SOMEBODY has to work Friday
How do ketchup chips figure into this story? Because I’m eating ketchup chips.
I miss Vancouver! Sigh…
http://www.nearof.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/1122-old-dutch-ketchup-02.jpg
Everyone in this story was eating ketchup chips the whole time, that’s also part of the subtext
Btw, does Sandra Santos look anything like Yanet García?
Speaking of hot Mexican ladies (no ofence), I will be watchng Season 2 of “The Strain” pretty much solely due to Mia Maestro.
Yeah, I could see that
http://www.theplace2.ru/archive/mia_maestro/img/MM1.jpg
Cards up 2-0 on the Dirt Stillers. This one’s for Bill Murray:
Sides with Mr Murray on this topic.
Love you like a brother Mr Hippo but…
Btw sorry this doesn’t pass the Bechdel test
Tyrannacy of the phallus ,, smgdh
BREAKING NEWS!
Ken Stabler might almost be close to not dying! Or not!
It’s confirmed: he’s with Al Davis now.
Sure, like Pol Pot is going to let him into “The Inner Chamber” right off the hop. Rikki, your comment is how I know that you don’t know how Hell works. SMH
Pfft, anyone who REALLY knew how hell worked would be SMDH, because Shaking My Damned Head.
SMDH should be on the indie band list.
Semi-pertinent!
Side note: anyone know how those “Published by…” fancy blurbs show up at the bottom of some folks’ articles? I’m getting all jelly of them.
Hover over your little name/icon in upper right corner, then click “edit my profile.” Go to the “About Yourself” section and fill in “Biographical Info” box. Voila!
/my technical expertise is thusly exhausted
I click on your profile and some dick with anger problems is pointing a gun at my head.
He just rightly notes that this is not Nam, this is bowling, there are rules.
I actually have a King Hippo avatar for this site, but my e-mail address links to another WordPress site (though it does NOT log into DFO, it DOES overrule the avatar for some weird reason ).
Anyhoo, I am too stupid and lazy too figure it out. So Walter Sobchek it is.
Let it be your constant reminder that a Canadian is really just an American without a gun.
Yeah, I “log in with WordPress” every time and it seems to work okay, but God help me if it doesn’t. Or more accurately, God help Chris, because he’s the one who will have to bail me out.
Hey, I’m stupid and lazy too! [declines to make salient/cutting remark about The America’s obsession with guns]
I spent all day trying to figure out how some of these assholes get them to appear in a sidebar next to the article, and this was as close as I got.
well, shit. Now I want to have THAT.
Not now, Willie. Mr. Van Houten has the floor.
He should also identify as A LOUD TALKER.
Well, he’s got important things to say, like “I’M DYING”
I missed that…
It was the subtext
“Man, I hate all the negative press Burning Man is getting.”
–Rich Tech Startup Douche
You know what makes this article? The original art.
You can’t spell article without it
This was EXACTLY what I was going to post. It’s priceless.
We need more individual art. Bad MS Paint included.
I cheat and use a digital camera because it can’t draw for shit.
Everybody today has to be a special snowflake. I’m sure those flames were just mentally induced because he wanted a reality show on E! When are kids going to learn to be happy cogs like me and their grandpa were? DO YOU THINK YOU’RE BETTER THAN US, STEVIE?
HE’S ON THE RIGHT TRACK, BABY!!