Your Thursday Night Football Open Thread

[peeks out from under the covers] Has it started yet? No? Who said I was scared? I’m not scared. Maybe it’s YOU that’s scared. [sighs]

Wash @ NYG: The Giants should  be 2-0. Let’s get that out of the way right now. Howevah, The Catastrophic Meltdowns really like the vibe that this team is giving off. As far as Washington is concerned, if this Matt Jones kid is the real thing and Morris keeps going they’ve got a running game that may take them to the NFC East title. Not that that will be a great accomplishment this year. Ain’t sour grapes grand? Cousins’ play is up and down and he doesn’t have D-Jax but the Giants don’t have Rogers-Cromartie so that should be a wash. Beason is ready to give it a go tonight-maybe he’ll make it through the whole game. You just never know, maybe the Giants finally get their *Coughlin* shit *Coughlin* together. We could be looking at another snooze-fest but, “It’s Still Real To Me, Damnit!” What can I say, the scotch is poured. (into an Oktoberfest-sized stein)

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Senor Weaselo

One first down ends it. So, three and out, punt return TD, onside kick, game-tying FG?

WCS

So let it be written, so let it be done.

MikeWallaceAndGromit

HURL THE YELLOW CLOTH IN THE AIR. MORE POWER. FLAGS FOR THE FLAG GOD.

Claymaker

28 completions for 501 yards? Seriously?

Doktor Zymm

Onside kick time. ALL THE ONSIDE KICKS.

IronAvenger6491

You have got to be kidding me.

JustStopDude

Flashback to the Giants-Ravens Super Bowl

Senor Weaselo

This game will never end, will it.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Derp. Derp never changes.

Thrillhouse

Of course. Of course that happened.

WCS

Sad JV Bengals fans are sad.

Doktor Zymm

Neat!

Dunstan

Ok, even the Giants can’t fuck this up. Good night, you sweet princes.

WCS

You were saying?

Senor Weaselo

Randle did a good. Although that was almost picked.

WCS

Eli gets TWO Capri Suns tonight!

Beerguyrob
IronAvenger6491

Huh….so somebody other than Beckham can catch.

Claymaker

Because fuck you that’s why.

MikeWallaceAndGromit

wut?

Redshirt

The referee doesn’t understand the rules, the commentators are blind, and the defenses couldn’t stop a pinwheel from moving on a gentle breeze. But other than that Memphis-Cincy has been a good game.

Senor Weaselo

And from what I’ve heard everyone died.

JustStopDude

In this situation, why wouldn’t you just take a knee every play as opposed to ru ning it just up the middle? I think a fumble is almost as likely as breaking through for a first down…

nomonkeyfun
WCS

STORNG TAEK

Senor Weaselo

How has Rueben Randle not been cut with how often he seems to fuck up?

Beerguyrob

Solid hands teams on both sides, for sure.

Horatio Cornblower

Timely comment this.

JustStopDude

I will give up sex…hell even masturbation, if the Giants manage to fuck up this lead!

Old School Zero

That was close.

IronAvenger6491

Wait…but they didn’t review it…

Claymaker

“Challenging the Unchallengable: Tom Coughlin and his Battle with Dementia”

-New York Times Bestseller #8: August 11, 2017

Thrillhouse

Someone should just turn the stadium lights off, maybe then everyone will take the hint.

Senor Weaselo

Pity touchdown?

WCS

So… the Giants are going to blow this, right?

Dunstan

The only reason I’m sticking around is that I know they’re capable of it.

Well, that and the dick jokes.

Doktor Zymm

Pointless derp, but still entertaining old man derpery

MikeWallaceAndGromit

No Coughlin, you had to make a moronic coaching decision EARLIER in the game to lose this properly.

MikeWallaceAndGromit

Hahahahahahah fucking Coughlin, this is fantastic!

IronAvenger6491

I really hope the Giants figure it out that they need to play the whole game instead of the first three quarters.

Dunstan

Whew, that decision to start Kirk Cousins in fantasy finally paid off!

WCS

Penn beat Villanova, 24-13. First Quaker victory over the Wildcats in footed ball since 1911.

JustStopDude

Got to love Phil selling this game like its week 2 of the preseason.

JustStopDude

The greatest derp play in Super Bowl history. I refuse to believe to this day, Eli hit the guy he was aiming at.

Senor Weaselo

But we’ll take it.

Claymaker

Is Alfred Morris alive?

Doktor Zymm

I wonder what I did in a past life to end up as a [*Redacted] s fan? I hope it was fun..

Dunstan

Ironically, you were President Andrew Jackson

MikeWallaceAndGromit

Reed garbage time points!

IronAvenger6491

And so it begins….

nomonkeyfun

Donde easta, el Moose?

Dick E. Phuck

There’s still 5 minutes left!!!

JustStopDude

Gruden just looks like the kind of dude that if he was your neighbor, you would hate him. Like he let’s his dog shit all over your front yard, but god help you if you don’t get the trashcans off the curb cause he is calling the HOA on your ass immediately.

MikeWallaceAndGromit

He climbs up on a ladder to hack off limbs from your tree because it hangs over his fence ever so slightly.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Aaaand we are into Yogi Berra rememberances….

Spanky Datass
Old School Zero

OH GOOD YOGI BERRA THIS IS RELEVANT

nomonkeyfun

Thank god I’m listening to the local radio broadcast. Flags in NYC were at half staff today for for the Yog. I loved the man, but my god it has gotten unbearable or even the most enjoyable player in baseball history.

BTW, have any of you ever tried to catch a ball with the old school catcher’s mitt Yogi used. Holy shit were those hard to use.

IronAvenger6491

RIP Yogi Bear

Dunstan

Finally, our long national nightmare is over. Our pic-a-nic baskets are safe!

IronAvenger6491

Boo-boo is still out there.

Claymaker

“They are going to send more people than Washington can block.”

-Defensive mastermind Phil Simms

Dunstan

Which is what, one?

Dunstan

Are we at least close to the record for most flags in a game not involving the Raiders?