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Your Thursday Night Football Open Thread

scotchnaut

/

,

[peeks out from under the covers] Has it started yet? No? Who said I was scared? I’m not scared. Maybe it’s YOU that’s scared. [sighs]

Wash @ NYG: The Giants should  be 2-0. Let’s get that out of the way right now. Howevah, The Catastrophic Meltdowns really like the vibe that this team is giving off. As far as Washington is concerned, if this Matt Jones kid is the real thing and Morris keeps going they’ve got a running game that may take them to the NFC East title. Not that that will be a great accomplishment this year. Ain’t sour grapes grand? Cousins’ play is up and down and he doesn’t have D-Jax but the Giants don’t have Rogers-Cromartie so that should be a wash. Beason is ready to give it a go tonight-maybe he’ll make it through the whole game. You just never know, maybe the Giants finally get their *Coughlin* shit *Coughlin* together. We could be looking at another snooze-fest but, “It’s Still Real To Me, Damnit!” What can I say, the scotch is poured. (into an Oktoberfest-sized stein)

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The Mighty Feklahr

FLAG EVERY PUNT!

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Stabby Pants

Flags for the flag god.

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MikeWallaceAndGromit

Holy shit I am absolutely doing a Warhammer 40k Flags for the Flag God post.

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The Mighty Feklahr

Anyway, good night in the Klingon Empire. My wifey is bringing me home an Italian steak sub and I am nuclear sub on green energy.

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The Mighty Feklahr

I might even actually get 3D glasses and popcorn for this game.

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MikeWallaceAndGromit

These refs are going to have their throwing arms fall off this game.

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WhyEaglesWhy

NFC East Fever! CATCH IT!

*NFC East player fails to catch it*

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Does anyone get the feeling that this Washington team is cursed? Like maybe they built their stadium on a Indian Burial ground, and also they dug up all the Indian corpses and shat all over them while screaming racist obscenities?

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entropy

I think they are doing just fine with only their name, no need to go all Poltergeist on them.

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Sill Bimmons

Actually, yes.

That is exactly how I feel.

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Senor Weaselo

ETERNITY OF THE SAFETY

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Hey, should I not have gotten drunk before the game?

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Sill Bimmons

Does it really matter now?

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Sill Bimmons

THAT WOULD COUNT IN THE INSANITY LEAGUE 7 PTS FOR NYG D/ST

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Senor Weaselo

Can you run these point rules again? I was either not paying attention or sad that all the fantasy signups were in the two week window I was away, or both.

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Sill Bimmons

Check the site under “Scoring Rules.”

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King Hippo

Judge Hippo’s blue shirt = NIGHT OF THE SAFETY!!!

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The Mighty Feklahr

THE PROPHECY LIVES!!!!

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bourb0nblues

The Aristocrats!

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entropy

Safety Cherry Condition: POPPED!!,

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scotchnaut

SAFETY DANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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MikeWallaceAndGromit

How the fuck you doin’ boys?! What we drinking? For me:
http://www.ninkasibrewing.com/images/beers/beers-large/flagship-total-domination.png

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MikeWallaceAndGromit

Holy shit my apologies no idea it was that big.

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VonTazeMeBro

Oh honey, dont apologize for largeness

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VonTazeMeBro

I’m drinking ALL the pumpkin ales

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

I had a Smuttynose Pumpkin this afternoon. It was delicious.

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Mother Puncher

Bought a Sam Adams sampler pack. Now drowning in brownish flavors.

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scotchnaut

Mill Street Organic Ale. I think I’m growing a spontaneous man-bun. Also have shiraz and Dalwhinnie on the go.

/help

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The Mighty Feklahr

They are artificially inventing ways of having the record for punt attempts in a TNF.

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Stabby Pants

Looks like last weeks brief flash of competence was all DC could muster.

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Welcome to Puntoberfest!

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Stabby Pants

Thats the third consecutive week that they’ve run that illegal pick play and gotten flagged for it. No one in NFC East apparently knows how to coach.

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WCS

God, this is going to be a 5-4 final score.

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Senor Weaselo

That’s generous, I was going 3-2.

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Sill Bimmons

GIVE UP THEYRE NOT LETTING THE PICK GO ANYMORE

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King Hippo

are the GREATRIOTS

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entropy

I think that flag was thrown farther than the football.

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The Mighty Feklahr

KOTW

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Stabby Pants

Drew Stanton and Brian Hoyer? How’d Cousins hold off those all stars.

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JustStopDude

Evening you beautiful fucking people! Hope all is well with you and yours.

I’m looking forward to a phone interview in the morning. Dear god I hope I get another job. I got the whole rant prepared for when I meet with HR for my exit interview.

It starts with “YOU FUCKERS CAUSED ME A MENTAL BREAKDOWN” and ends with me being led out by security with two tazer darts in my back.

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Senor Weaselo

Sounds like fun.

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I would like to hire whoever put together that pre-game package to direct my ad campaign for my new line of industrial strength turd polish.

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VonTazeMeBro

Entropy is your auto refresh still not working

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entropy

It’s better tonight, thank you.

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VonTazeMeBro

Sonofabitch, mines not:/

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King Hippo

That will be Cousins’ longest pass of the night.

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The Mighty Feklahr

Kirk Cousins was my favorite kid at little league.

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WCS

There’s no way the Dr. Pepper vendor in those commercials doesn’t have at least 15 corpses stuffed in a crawl space.

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The Mighty Feklahr

In EACH crawlspace!

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The Mighty Feklahr

Josh Brown and Reggie White have something in common imho

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Stabby Pants

Remember when this was a great rivalry? No, because if you were alive for that, you are senile now.

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Sill Bimmons

Steady on!

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King Hippo

Montage theme – these franchises didn’t always suck ass!

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entropy

Ok. I have officially stopped drawing for the evening, and I am now ready to pay full attention to every insipid moment of this collision of single-digit IQ football teams. Let the…… mediocre?….. times roll!

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bourb0nblues

FOOTBALL! NOW WITH 50% MORE FLY FISHING!

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The Mighty Feklahr

Guys, I don’t super hate the CBS TNF coverage. But I am a homer for my fellow UNI Panther Kurt Warner, so it is mostly my fault.

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litre_cola

I knew in week 2 my season was over when I had to pick up Dexter McLuster today.

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Sill Bimmons

hey guys

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VonTazeMeBro

Hey!

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Sill Bimmons

sup hows bein a mom

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VonTazeMeBro

My boobs are huge and I touch lots of poop, so it’s pretty glorious as of now

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Sill Bimmons

sounds like a little slice of paradise imo

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entropy

Nothing better than poop-glazed boo—- wait. I think I said that wrong.

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WCS

sup homie

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Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

Hey Sill!

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Sill Bimmons

Are you someone who can make Derp Condition: Paisley happen?

Because if you are, you should make it and then it’ll be OURS

http://st.depositphotos.com/1008639/1843/v/950/depositphotos_18437937-Paisley.jpg

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Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

http://i.imgur.com/G1aCjnp.png

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VonTazeMeBro

Yall, the Pope is adorable!

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King Hippo

It’s weird living in a world where the Pope isn’t a jerk.

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VonTazeMeBro

Did you see him going into the cathedral? Just non stop smiles and popin’ it up freshness

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KidFlash

Compared to Benedict, who looked and acted like he practiced shooting lightning bolts out of his fingers behind Vatican walls, he’s… a saint.

/I’ll be here all week.

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WCS

Bearcats quarterback did not give the “thumbs-up” when he was carted off. Not good.

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Doktor Zymm

I will be eating lebanese food during the first half

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litre_cola

I went with a take away Moroccan.

How very ethnic.

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The Mighty Feklahr

Kahless on a Kracker! This could be some kind of Holy Grail of Thursday Night Football. We might learn what lies beyond PLAID.
http://i.imgur.com/xnvmcyh.jpg
My official pick is Skins at home by a safety. (0-2 probably)
My official “Derp Warning Level” is “Plaid*”

(*undetermined)

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Sill Bimmons

PAISLEY.

GET ON IT PHOTOSHOP TYPES.

http://st.depositphotos.com/1008639/1843/v/950/depositphotos_18437937-Paisley.jpg

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The Mighty Feklahr

STORNG SUGGESTION, we will have a chance to verify it tonight, it might be the actual “The Washington Redskins Go Fuck Yourself Christmas Special”.

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WCS

Cincy Bearcats quaterback was just murdered. I’m not using hyperbole. He may be dead.

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WhyEaglesWhy

That’s horrifying. They just said they won’t show the replay until they assess the situation (figure out if he’s dead or not).

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King Hippo

I flip, and they show the replay.

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Senor Weaselo

I feel weird for asking this, but how did he get taken off? Couldn’t have possibly gotten off under his own power.

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WCS

The body board. Loaded him right into the ambulance.

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Redshirt

Cincy’s QB just got knocked out.

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Redshirt

Bearcats headsets aren’t working? Are any of Memphis’s coaches related to Belichick?

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Senor Weaselo

No cheesecake? Aww man…

http://blogchef.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/Snickers_cheesecake_2.jpg

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King Hippo

Hee hee, nice cheesecake alternative. Clever scotchy!

Judge Hippo presiding, calling Scotchnaut and Doktor Zymm to the stand. As Most Glorious Baseball Cardinals are getting shitcanned, this game has my full and unadulterated pilled/drunken attention. AS IT SHOULD!

Why should we mildly cheer on your footy side this splendid autumn evening? Will you be drunk and entertaining for the masses? Will it further the goals of Most Glorious Commentist Party? Is the other one a clandestine Trotskyite?

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scotchnaut

Yer Honour,

I’d like to submit the Doktor Zymm has not even appeared yet. AND, I’ve no doubt she’s wearing yoga PANTS. [crowd gasps] I’m done yer honour.

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King Hippo

GOOD points! Preferring the company of real boys to imaginary ones, no doubt. Most unfortunate.

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nomonkeyfun

I would like to make an application to HIzzoner,
I am filing an amicus brief on behalf of Scotch and his case.
Neutral fans should be rooting for the large men, because this will put them on the path to the playoffs. If we get there, our derpalicious leader, the great Elisha, humorous be his name, can lead the men in blue to a third victory over the Patriots in the Superbowl. This will create both a Pats schadenfreude day, and Pey-Peyfreude day. It will truly be a glorious occasion, for all commentists.

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King Hippo

Let January be forever renamed Derpuary. Solid amicusing.

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scotchnaut

There’s no fun like nomonkeyfun.

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His Right Honorable Lord Lordship the Lordly

Tommy Tubberville has had a weird career arc.

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scotchnaut

Weird last name as well.

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King Hippo

Baby, if you ever wondered. Wondered whatever became of meeeeeeee……

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WCS

The fans of Texas Tech hated Tuberville more than WIP callers hated McNabb. It was weird.

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Redshirt

Watching UC-Memphis on ESPN. Seeing tiger striped helmets but not orange and black looks weird.

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WCS

Thanks for the reminder. One or both of these teams will be the next targets of Big 12 expansion. I think. MAYBE.

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Redshirt

I hope its Cincinnati. They had a few years where they were kings of the Big East, but being in between the Big Ten and the SEC, they can’t compete as an AAC member.

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Senor Weaselo

The kings of Big East football was like the one-eyed man in the land of the blind. Or the most loyal Texans fan.

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King Hippo

Aw, WCS. You supposed to come rescue teh Wolfpack first…

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WCS

If it would perpetuate the destruction of the ACC, I’m all for it.

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entropy

Let’s get it started:

comment image

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entropy

I think she’s looking at you, WCS.

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Eliza always gets a like from me.

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entropy

I’m not gonna tell you what a wash outside of Tucson, AZ is called. I’d get killed for it.

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